Would This Bother You? - Bloomington,IL

Let me guess...you are concerned that he might be gay because he plays with girls?
Nope, boys playing with girls or girls playing with boys does not make a child gay. All it makes them is a child playing with another child.

When I was that age my bff was a little boy. Don't get too hung up on gender. Kids are kids. Let him play with whomever he likes and don't worry about it.

Kids pick their friends because of their personalities, not their gender. When I was a little girl I preferred playing with the boys over the girls.

Nothing to worry about! We are way too hard on gender issues in this country. Whenever my husband would get worried that my son liked to play princesses with his sister or push around her pink stroller, I'd remind him that he had no issue with our daughter playing with trucks or hitting a baseball. Let's take it easy on our boys. Having them enjoy playing with girls or having an emotional or sensitive side doesn't make them less of a boy/man. And, let's make sure we aren't sending the message that feminine traits are lesser or weaker. Here is a great article/web site on raising boys: http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/how-raising-em...

All the best!

No, why does it matter.

Well...what are you thinking you should be worried about? Usually when you worry it's because of something you are scared of for the future.

For me...no I would be fine.

uuumm...I've got 4 boys....they play Star Wars...and one has to play Princess Leah....they all take turns...

There's not a problem here. Why are you trying to make it one?

C.,

Welcome to mamapedia!!!

I think you are over reacting. Your son is normal. What are you freaking out about? You think because he plays with girls there is a problem with him? No. No problem with him. Nothing to worry about...move along.

Having done daycare for a long time I can assure you that there have been plenty of boys who were just like you described and ended up very "manly" as jr. high kids. One such boy is now in 9th grade and up until 6th grade would come down and play with my daughter (same age) and younger daughter (3 yrs younger) ALL THE TIME. He preferred my daughters and his sisters to any boys cause the play was more engaged and complicated he said, and "smart". But in the last 4 yrs he switched to being all about doing boy things and abandoned playing with girls. This was a boy exactly like you described, dressed up in all the girly clothes even.

So, rest assured, it's normal and good. That's the kind of boy that will make a great husband some day. Another boy I can think of is now a Dad of a little girl and is a wonderful young man.

You are writing about something when there is nothing to worry about. Honestly...let it go. Making a deal about it will cause YOU problems in the future.

You know, biogry, prejudice and sterotyping are all LEARNED. If you don't change your thinking, these are the things you are going to teach your child.

No, there is absolutely nothing to worry about. Again, you need to come into the 21st century and adjust your thinking in order to NOT pass unwanted ideas to your child.

Why worry? There's not much you can do about it anyway. And if your son was gay, would you love him less? No! So just go with his flow.

When one of my sons was 3, he loved dressing up in princess dress up clothes. It didn't bother me. When he was turning 7 or 8 (I can't remember which), instead of having a party, we opted to let him take 4 friends to a local indoor playland. All the friends he invited were girls. I thought it was cute. Now that he's in 3rd grade, he's gravitating away from the girls and playing more with boys. He's happy with his friend choices, I'm happy for him, whichever gender he gravitates to.

On the flip side, my 11 year old stepdaughter mostly plays with boys. We are fine with that too...for now. LOL!

It pains me to think that what you're afraid of is that he's gay. He will still be your darling boy, following what his genes tell him. I hope you'll support his happiness in all things.

He sounds well-balanced.

No. Why does it bother you?

I think it's fine, personally. As long as he doesn't have a problem playing with boys his age, what's the harm? Pretty much my entire life, I always got a long better with boys than girls. I always had more boy friends than girl friends.

Hey Mama...
I'm a worrier, too, and my son (2) goes to daycare. Every day I ask him "who did you play with?" And every day it's the same thing..."Claire." Coming from him, it sounds like he ONLY plays with Claire and that may be the case...evidently she's a real cutie! (I haven't met her yet as her mom and I pick up at different times.) At first it bothered me (probably for the same reasons it bothers you) but my husband is a sweet man who loves the ladies (raised my mom and has a sister) and in my opinion, my son is just honing his skills to be a "ladies man"! I know he plays with the other boys, too, because I've seen him and he loves to rough house with Dad. He also loves to sit quietly and read by himself, which made me worry that maybe he was anti-social or autistic - he's not.
I believe the problem is that we are constantly bombarded with stories from other that portray our own worst case scenarios, when in reality, this is just normal childhood behavior. I know my mom didn't have access to so many other people's lives and problems because if she did, she would have questioned EVERYTHING I ever did...she's a worrier too.
Continue to let your son be a kid, pray for him daily, and leave the rest up to the Lord...and (I'm preaching to myself) stop worrying so much! :) Merry Christmas!

I wouldn't worry about it. Very normal at this age.

He is a loving tender boy. I have one of those. He loves the girls!!!! That is what boys were wired to do.....

Him playing with mostly girls would not bother me anymore than my girl playing mostly with boys would (she does so it doesn't bother me at all). Growing up, I always had more male friends than female and it looks like my girl may be the same way. In fact, one of her favorites just had a birthday party and only invited boys. Then, decided he wanted to invite my daughter...except for family she was THE only girl there. She plays TNMT & DC Nation with these boys at recess. She is the biggest girlie girl and loves her dresses but can also be the biggest tomboy while wearing them. My guess is that your son is the male equivalent.

my son is 5. in every school he has been in (4, includes k) he has always had a close friend who was a girl. He even told me he was going to marry elizabeth (two friends in two different schools were named elizabeth, kind of comical). The next day he divorced her, lol.

My sons best friends are our neighbor girls 8 & 6. Great girls! They play boy games and watch girly tv shows. The time you need to worry is when they start getting a little curious with each other (kissing). But overall...Your son will be just a well rounded child who can be friends with anyone.

dont sweat it now :)

I don't think there is anything wrong at all. If he is healthy, what could be wrong.

Do you think he should have a more diverse group of friends? You can't pick his friends.

When my daughter used to talk about marriage and future life, I would just tell her she has a long time before she has to worry about that.

Like most of the others have said it is nothing to worry about. By the sounds of it he is more attached to the girls because of his sister, that and he is wired to like girls.

I was this way myself mainly because there was nothing but boys around where I grew up. I had a few female friends but I was also closer to the boys. I am still this way to this day, I only have one close girlfriend and the rest of my close friends are guys, with me being an acquaintance with their other halves.
My daughter is also the same way at the age of 6, she has a couple girlfriends but with being raised around her 6 boy cousins and 1 brother, she is happier playing with the boys. (out of all the kids she is the only girl).

This stuff is harmless at this age. It's the adults that make more out of nothing at this age. Kids need to live their childhood as children not having parents think that everything they do might turn out sexually (not that, that is what you are doing).

Theres nothing to worry about! Let him enjoy the fun, before you know it he just might end up marrying one of those girls! :)

Maybe she's a nice girl. ;)

At that age, they don't always think the other gender has cooties. My son still plays with my daughter, and they 15 and 12. And they never stopped playing with each other. Even his friends have always included her as "just another kid". And when friends of the family who ONLY had girls came over, he played with all of them and they played with him equally. One of the girls sought him out b/c she loved being outside constantly... and they had a lot in common.
When they are hunting dinosaur bones and exploring treasure maps, it doesn't matter if they are a girl or a boy. A kid is a playmate. Fun times, before all the drama and "flirting" mess starts later on...

Don't worry about it.
Let him enjoy being friends with whomever he makes friends with because you can't dictate whom he has the most in common with.
Just be happy he has friends he enjoys.
My son's best friend is a girl. Yes he makes friends with boys but again...
his best friend is a girl. They are adorable together. They play outdoors
and have a lot of fun.

Not a problem at this age. My daughter's best friend was a boy until they hit age 8 or 9. Then they'd hang around a bit together but not as much. Little kids don't see gender as much as they see children with like interests.

As long as he has friends and is happy, I wouldn't care. My 7 yr old son plays with the 5 year old girl on our street. Kids love kids.

I really don't get your question. You think there is something wrong with a child having friends the opposite gender?

Wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

Hi. No, it would not bother me! In fact that was my son up to about age 6. Till he was 5 his very best friend in the world was a girl (then she moved away, sadly). I started inviting more boys over (one at a time) for a playdate. He just gradually grew to have a best friend who was a boy. But he is 9 now and he will happily play with both boys AND girls. He sometimes invites a girl over and sometimes a boy. He gets crushes easily. He used to only like to play with girls and do the things they do...but now he is into boy type games (nerf guns, playing war, spy games, video games). He likes girls still and gets along very well with them. He has a lot of friends at school. I think he will grow into a young man who naturally has both men and women friends. He can relate well to girls (unlike some of his friends who are boys).

Don't worry, at 6 this is fairly common. You said he plays with his sister so he obviously likes girls. My youngest Daughter preferred boy toys and had mostly boys for friends in kdg. She just was more sporty. At 16 she's a very well rounded and confident young lady. Let your son pick his friends no matter their gender.

At that age, I played with a neighbor boy...only kid around.

I had a neighbor that was concerned about her son only having girls as friends, but he's in 6th grade now and hangs out with the boys.

Let him decide...at that age kids are kids...boy or girl.

Most of my son's favorite school friends are girls. He is 7. He does often play with boys during recess, but I think he _likes_ the girls better. Most of his friends outside of school are boys, but I think the boys at the school tend to be pretty immature. His female classmates are less rowdy and rough, which suits my son's personality better in an educational setting.

I wouldn't so much worry about it but keep an eye on it. For me, the concern would be as he gets older. Boys with mostly female friends in elementary school tend to have a harder time in middle and high school. The girls who provided their primary social support system start becoming interested in more traditionally masculine boys as they get older, leaving their former male companions somewhat adrift. The book "Why Gender Matters" by Leonard Sax discusses this phenomenon. It's a very interesting book in general. If you can get your son involved in activities (like sports or clubs) where he has an opportunity to interact with boys with similar interests, that might give him the opportunity to widen his social circle.

Oh, I just read some of the other responses. You're not really worried that your child is gay, are you? That wouldn't even have occurred to me, especially considering he is talking about marrying his little girl friend. That wouldn't be my concern at all, if that's what is bothering you.

Nah, no worries, sounds like he'll make a fine husband one day! My boys love ICarly, My little Pony and Star Wars and super heroes. My oldest gets along great with girls, for all his wild energy levels he has such a tender heart. I love that about him! I say you are worried over nada :)

Your question and many of these answers allude to an underlying fear that your boy is Gay. I cannot think of any reason to "worry" except the possibility that your son is Gay. Maybe he is, maybe not, but playing with a girl in Kindergarten is not some early sign IF that's what you're asking.

Love your boy for who he is, support him in his life not matter who he loves and be thankful he's healthy, happy and has friends of either gender.

I would not bother me in the slightest. I would be proud of having such a sweet, confident-in-himself little boy.

Honestly, what you've got is a little boy who wants to marry a girl, and who's sweetly attuned to that girl's feelings and interests. So he's all set up to be an uncommonly fantastic husband and father.

How in the WORLD could that ever be a problem -- for anyone???

Not a thing to worry about. My son has both gender friends. He has a best friend that is a boy and one that is a girl.
He plays girl stuff at home (he has older sister) and boy stuff.
I think you are worrying over nothing. Great that he has a variety of friends.
many blessings

He's barely had any time in this world to meet people and make friends. Give him some time.

He likes to play with girls probably because he has a sister and is familiar with playing with her.

You are worrying about nothing.

C.,
Nothing to worry about. My son did the same thing, and pink was his favorite color. Does that make me a bigot, or prejudice, or think my son is gay? Hell no it doesn't. It makes you a concerned parent, like most of us are.

Would you feel the same way if it was your daughter who was mainly playing with boys? I don't think you have anything to worry about at all.

Absolutely nothing to worry about. There are always some boys who have mostly girl friends and some girls who play with the boys. There is nothing wrong with it. In a couple of years, he may change his tune and think girls are gross. Or maybe not. But at six, I think a lot of kids are still in this stage. My son is also six and, while now he plays mostly with boys, he still has a lot of girl friends.