Just Found Out Im Pregnant with TWINS

They should be excited about the twins if they aren't feeling pushed aside for them. Inclusion is great, but also, remember to give them "special time" when you don't have to worry about the babies. Get a sitter later on and take the older kids to the movies or do something special just for them.

I would suggest keeping them as involved in the process as you can depending on their ages. Talk to them about what is happening, how the babies are growing, what your plans are.

Perhaps even help them with decorating the nursery and picking out names.

Congratulations A.!:)

Your concerns for their feelings are very normal. If you can, take them with you to appointments so they can see what the doctor is telling you. Allow them to hear the babies heartbeats. That will bring the reality of their siblings to light. That might get them excited. Maybe take one child, alternating each month would be an adventure for them.

After the babies are born, I would continue to have the kids involved such as, tossing the diaper into the trash.....helping feeding (with you or your hubby's assistance), sharing the alphabet with the babies, reading books (short 5 minute kiddy stories and rhymes), anything simple and fun. Us adults sometimes forget that kids need a lot of things explained to them. Even if it's simple.lol. I've done it.

Good luck with everything!
M. :)

A.,

Good for you for being concerned about the other two kids' feelings. I would sit down with your husband and work out a plan, then have him talk to his kids about the twins. You don't say how old they are, but keep everything open and honest, and on their level.

My son was three when I was pregnant with my daughter. We took him to the pre-natal visits. He loved being able to help the doctor find the baby's heartbeat, and measure Mommy. He had nightmares after the ultrasound visit though. He was 3 years 5 months when she was born, and the first words out of his mouth were: can I hold my baby sister now? Not Hi Mom, I missed you Mom, How are you Mom? Nope, was all about his baby sister and still is today, 16 months later.

Hope this helps,
Melissa

HI A.!
Congrats & Congrats!!
I've actually been in your shoes. I am a step mom of 2 children prior to my girl/girl fraternal twins.
What we did is we actively have them involved in the care of the twins and they were involved in the whole process of pregnancy helpin me stay nourished bringing me water, food, toting some heavy items for me. Running for groceries... (hardly :) I was so big when i was pregnant I used the store scooters to get around the what seemed a gigantic store toting 2 babies around in my tummy. the stepchildren would help me with getting the keys to the scooter grabing things for the cart all around useful helpful things. when the twins were born they would help feed, change, dispose of and entertain the twins. I think with twins it def. takes a village. have them get involved there is enough love & support to go around. let them know that it will be all of you in to win! build them up for the big day and the sleep deprivation after the big day and how it will take a toll on energy and homelife... but it gets easier as the twins sleep longer and have a nap/sleep routine. then in the off times sit down and have your time with the older stepchildren like talk about their "worlds" and/or watch a movie or snuggle with a nap when the twins are napping. I often will run to the store with one kid at a time for QT.
keep them involved everystep of the way & it will be fine! :)
oh, and get involved in a twins club you'll need it! where are you located?

Do everything in your power to make the pregnancy and birth of the twins a family project. Let your two stepchildren help in any way possible, that way they know that they are just as important to your "family" as anyone else. Let them help plan the nursery, let them help you think of names, let them rub your back, feel the babies kicking, and any of a million other things that will help get the party started. Let them know that love shared is love multiplied. Tell them that "big" brothers and sisters are the BEST thing that a baby can have. I know that you will help them to know and love their siblings. Good luck!

Your step children may be thrilled - or ticked -- you have no control over THAT - but - you can say -'''' boy, I'm glad there are two of you guys - cause I will surely need your help - with two babies - thank heavens You guys are my angels - babies are cute - but you can talk, and tell me whats' on your mind - we surely are going to need you now!!

Also - depending on their age- when the babies are born '''' look at how he smiles at you - he really thinks you are MAGIC-- and he always will -- when he can run and play like you are doing now- he will see you driving a car!!-- He's always going to know you are amazing!!!""" ( change the specifics to fit the situation- but big kids often love the adoration and delight that little babies provide)

You could include them in the birth as well - I hope you can take your time to find a good midwife who will support you in giving birth naturally (most doctors automatically do C-section with twins). And you can talk with them about their feelings all during the pregnancy as well and reassure them of your love.

You're worries are normal. The responses below are amazing. What a group of women/moms.
Look for parenting books on the subject. I'd bet there are a ton.
Where will you be delivering at? Let me know if you have any questions on that front as that's what I do for a living...help women and families who are having babies.

Ok. I have an 8 year old stepdaughter and I also have a 4 year old son. My son was unexpected, but we were all excited about it. My SD was very happy about getting a baby brother. She has had some concerns about how bubba gets to be with daddy all the time, and also how his mommy and daddy live together and she has to go between the two. We have explained everything to her, she knows that mommy and daddy are not getting back together, but we have also tried to make it very supportive for her. She likes to help, and although she is living with us right now, when she was not living with us and only came over on the weekends, we have always tried to make it special for her. Things are going to change for them, but we found that just being honest with her has made it easier for her, and giving her the environment where she feels comfortable to voice her concerns, unhappiness, or anything else she feels.