Is there a certain age limit by law when a child can decide if she wants to go to school with mom or dad? I know every state is different and that it depends on the maturity level of the child as well. Child is always excited to start school at current school, but always questions when she can go to school where her Dad did.
Has anyone else run into this problem? How did you resolve it?
Dad is really involved with his old school and even on the school board. He goes to all the sporting events so she knows about his school and spends hours there at different events. She has even made friends there that get to come over when she is at her dads house. He isn't pushing the issue about where she goes to school whether it be where she goes now or where he went and has lived his whole life. Basically I think she is just wondering about going to a different school with her other set of friends.
Confusing question. Could you please clarify if this is a custodial issue or a child just arbitrarily wanting to go out of district to the school her dad went to.
I'm not understanding the question.
Like a previous poster mentioned, it sounds like her dad is trying to coerce her to go live with him. You don't say how old your daughter is. Are you and her dad involved in a custody dispute? The best person to ask would be your attorney if you are going to court.
I can tell you my experience, but everyone's situation is different. My ex and I had a custody battle. I let my daughter go live with her dad when she was 12. Even though I had physical custody, my daughter had problems at school as a result of her father's constant coercing. Our daughter became very difficult to live with. It became so unbearable at my house that our school suggested she go try move in with her father. I let her go and it helped in some ways.
The lesson learned in my situation is that no matter whom the child resides with, there will always be problems unless the two parents learn to work together instead of against one another.
Sorry to ask for further clarification, but I'd like to help if I can....
So basically if I understand correctly - Dad went to, say, LaLa Prep Academy, and your daughter has a bunch of friends who are current students at LaLa.
But you do not want her to go to LaLa Prep? Or you are just worried about her switching schools?
Can you clarify some of those details?
Is this a private school or a public school?
If public - do you and your ex-husband live in the same school zone/district?
Would this change custody from you to him and you don't want that?
What do YOU want?
Does your daughter state/demand she wants to go to Daddy's school?
I'm sorry - I've NEVER had this problem. One of the schools I attended was in Hawaii and my husband turned down the job offer he had for Hawaii so my kids couldn't go where I first started school. And California is bankrupt so we aren't moving there for my kids to experience any of my other schools....and we won't move to France or Boston for them to go to schools my husband/their dad went to.
Sounds like you need to sit down and really figure out what YOU want and what your daughter wants. Is this other school BETTER than the one she is attending?
It appears I have more questions than answers. I didn't come from a divorced home so this was never an option for me. With my daughter - who is now an adult - we didn't live where either her dad or me went to school either. When we divorced, she came back to the United States a year after her dad left.
Sorry - wish I could be of better help to you!
I don't understand, why can't she go to the school she wants to? When can she decide, sounds like she already did. Are you asking when she can force you to accept her decision? She could make you accept it now but she probably doesn't know how to get an attorney to represent her.
You are the adults! Act like it. Make a decision.
Now if you are hearing from your ex that he wants to take you to court so your daughter can be allowed to go to a different school I can assure you the courts will more than likely listen to her and allow the change even at a young age. If you really need a number seven is the youngest I have heard of the court listening to a child in all matters.
Could you clarify your question? Totally confused.
Sounds like a custody question - you need to discuss it with your lawyer.
It also seems Dad is feeding her info in order to get her to questions your decisions.
She wouldn't be bringing up other schools unless someone was telling her about them.
Typically, the child attends school in the area where their primary physical residence is. So if the Mom has primary custody, the child goes to the school where Mom lives. If Dad, then Dad's school. If there is 50/50 custody, then the parents just need to decide which school would work best for the child.
Call the district and ask. Here it's fairly easy to change schools within the district, but if a child lives outside the district it's much harder to get in. And obviously the paperwork needs to be submitted by an adult, not a child. Children don't sign themselves up for school until they go to college!
In most states a child of 12 can go before a judge and say who they want to live with. The judge does not have to allow them to move to that parents home but if there are no legal reasons for them to not go then they'll likely sign custody to dad or mom depending on the outcome of that court hearing.
