Hey Ladies
I am so irrate right now my friend has been dating a guy now for 8 mths ..In the beginnig everything was peachy "you all know how that goes " lol Well he use to give her money to do her hair and he would take her out to dinner etc,, But let me tell u guys a little bit about him he was living with someone for 12 years she supposely cheated on him and they broke up they had two children my friend lives with her mom and has one child doesnt really cook and is very out going Now .Back to my friend at one time he insisted she move in with him but she said she wanted to wait ..Well Thank God she did ! He has been gradually changing he tells her she should wash his clothes and cook and even take care of his children which he has every two weeks ? but this is the frosting to the cake Today he told her if she ever wanted to get a ring from him she should earn it !!! lol What do you guys think ?
My comment back to him would be "if you want to put a ring on this finger you have to earn it". He is a jerk. He is using her as the maid and babysitter. She needs to run and quickly and NO MORE BABIES!!!
the first thing that pops to my mind? RUN FORREST RUN!!!
Sounds like she needs to get away from this guy and never look back...learn from this and know that she is not his maid or his nanny....
However, if she still wants to stay with him EVEN after hearing this from him? nothing you say will convince her to leave....you will just have to tell her - I'll be here to help pick up the pieces..
JERK OFF ! sorry for your friend - tell her to RUN the opposite way !
THE GUY IS A JERK AND POTENTIALLY ABUSIVE... AND SHE SHOULD GET THE HECK AWAY FROM HIM.
He is, weird and really full of red-flags.
It's not about what we think it's about what your friend thinks. She knows what he expects from her and she knows what her expectations are. If she's not married to him, not living with him, and if he isnt the father of her child she can decide if what he wants is what she wants to do, she has nothing binding her to him. It's her choice.
My husband pretty much expects me to cook and do his laundry, just like I expect him to take out the trash and wash our car. It's give and take. If you love someone it isnt a chore to take care of them.
I think she should put in an application elsewhere.Her earnings might be better.
I think he's an idiot.
ok, so he does all this for her and buys her things, meanwhile she lives at home and doesn't cook and you are hinting that she is a flirt. Yet he still wanted to advance the relationship. And now, over time, he has decided that he doesn't want a one sided relationship that is not going anywhere. He wants her to step up. Show him that she is willing to be a wife to him, not just take his money and let him buy her things. She doesn't want to cook or do laundry or bond with his kids or work a job. Would you marry a man that had not shown any willingness to be a husband?
well its up to your friend, if she is willing to wash his clothes and cook and care for his children for a ring that is her choice. If she is not willing to do so then I guess he isnt the one for her.
Sounds to me like someone else tried for 12 years to 'earn' a ring and look how that ended up! She finally realized what a d-bag this guy is and found someone better (if that's even the real story, everyone knows there are two sides and I'm sure he painted himself out to be roses). Ask her where she wants to be in 12 years!
What does SHE think about this?
You don't earn a ring.
It is given out of love.
Tell her to run!!!
LBC
i think he is a supremo jerk!!!!!!! she should tell him to bug off and never see him again. what a jerk!!! he is probably very controling and abusive, this is usually how they start.
Leave him. There's a reason the mother of his children is not around. 6 months is the infatuation period. They will do anything for you. She needs to lay down her own laws and tell him if he expects her to accept a ring from him, well then he needs to earn it. Bullies never change and he sounds like one. Good luck.
She should tell him to stick that ring where the sun don't shine and get rid of the loser.
Are you kidding? You know what we think. We think what you think! RUN!! The only good thing is that she doesn't have to move her stuff out because she never moved in.
Perhaps they need to sit down and have a conversation about what they expect from a spouse.
Is a wife a servant?
Is a husband her master?
What are the duties of a husband?
What are the duties of a wife?
What kind of relationship does he want his wife to have with his children?
What kind of relationship does she want her husband to have with her child?
Why do they love one another?
What qualities do they see in one another that they'd like to work on?
Lots of questions that they probably haven't discussed yet, but really need to. Based on what you have reported, he SEEMS to be the type of guy who wants a servant, not a mate. But, we only have your friend's side of the story, so it is not fair to make a judgment.
Kick him to the curb. Things will only get worse especially if she keeps doing what he TELLS her to do. Earn a ring?...Please!
Tell your friend to run - not walk - out of this relationship. No woman should be forced to cook and clean for anyone. Additionally, no one EARNS a wedding ring. It's a gift. This is not healthy for her or her child and certainly not for his kids!
let me see, she is expected to babysit his kids for FREE, and he is trying to trick her into believing she is un worthy.. please. he sounds like an abuser, who is looking to lure her into moving in with him so she can cook and clean for his entire family, without pay, of course. tell her to leave him now for her own safety
K. h.
