Thinking of Enrolling My 20 Month Old in School/childcare

Updated on July 26, 2009
J.F. asks from McKinney, TX
8 answers

Hello moms! My son is about to be 20 months and he is currently very much a mama's boy! But he has never been away from me more than a day since I am a SAHM. Yes, although he can be very clingy, he is also very sweet and loving. The problem is that I am 5 months pregnant and I am worried about how he (and I ) will cope when the new baby arrives. Several family members and friends have suggested that I enroll him in a childcare program, like a montessori school, so he can learn to be more sociallized while giving me a break at the same time. So my question to you mamas is this: Do you think he is too young for school? Also, if you have been through this before with your kids, do you ever regret this decision, or was it one of the best moves you ever made for them??? I think socilaization for him would be good (esp. before the new baby comes); however, I am worried that his sweet personality will change and he will pick up bad behaviors, like biting, from other kids. Please tell me what you think...most places begin en rolling next month in August. Thanks so much!!!!

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S.L.

answers from Dallas on

the rule given to me by a child care worker: a day of socialization per year of life. so 2 days a week would be plenty. it could be as informal as Mother's day out, but yes personally i'm all for a school environment. both of my boys have been in child care to some degree for their entire lives. no i don't feel like i missed their lives at all. i feel like i've given them the best start that i possibly could.

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A.M.

answers from Dallas on

Have you tried joining a mom's club and taking him to playdates? My son was 16 months old when his brother was born and he has never been in a MDO or other childcare. He did just fine. I go to playdates about once a week and he does really well.
Email me if you want more info.
A.

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H.B.

answers from Dallas on

I put my daughter in montessori school at 20 months (she is 23 months now) and I am glad I did. She goes 3 days a week. It took some adjusting on both parts. She does not get enough sleep at school and it has taken her some time to get used to that; some days she is still really fussy in the evenings after school from all the stimulation and short nap. I had to alter her schedule a little so that it would be more like the schedule at school.
She has never started biting, but she has hit me once or twice. I don't know if she gets this from school or if it's just a 2 year old thing. Her vocabulary is growing, she eats with a fork and spoon now, uses a napkin, and refuses to use a sippy cup at meals, she wants the lid off! She can put on her own pants now and asks to use the potty sometimes. She understands the concept of sharing and taking turns and she puts up toys when she is through with them. She cleans up her own spills and likes to help me do whatever she sees me doing. I use my days off to run errands, shop, craft, and clean house so that on the days she's home, I can just spend fun time with her.
If you start him in school, I would do it well before the baby comes so he can have your full attention while he is adjusting.
Good luck with the new baby.

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D.L.

answers from Dallas on

I think you should enroll him in a school or a daycare program. My daughter started school when she was 2 and she learned so much from teachers and her peers. She was sweet when she started and she is still sweet now at 4 1/2. You can just enroll him part-time if you like and I think it's the best thing for any child. Now it will be hard when you do it, but you have to think of the best interest of your child. He will pick up more than socialization skills when go and plus this will make going into preschool 10x easier rather than keeping your son home before going into preschool.

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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

My son was in an in home setting from 4 mo to 26 mo. At 26 mo the woman keeping him couldn't anymore so I was forced to find childcare. I chose a preschool because I was not happy with the inhome setting. The first 2 weeks was a little rough but the teachers said he only cried when I dropped him off. They said he played and was happy the rest of the day. It has definitely been a great move. He has learned so much there. He's barely 3 and knows the alphabet, can count to 20, knows his shapes and colors too. My son is still the sweet little boy he was when I enrolled him. He has never hit or bit any other children. If anything he's learned to be more patient and share more. Hope this helps. Good luck. BTW, my son goes to Merryhill Preschool off of Rufe Snow in Keller. They have full and part time programs.

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M.H.

answers from Dallas on

I started my dd in a class 2 days a week for 4 hours when she was about 20 months. She LOVES it, and when i go to pick her up she wants to stay and play. I as really leery about doing it, and the first place i took her i cried every time, but we switched to a new place, she never cries when i take her, she has a BLAST, and has new friends, and loves her teachers. And now that i have to go back to work during the week, i dont feel stressed out at all about it, because i know she is happy there.

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K.F.

answers from Dallas on

I work part-time so I put my youngest in Mother's Day Out for two days a week starting last year - she was 17 months old. I was a little worried that she was too young to enjoy the other kids but she LOVED IT! It was hard at first leaving her b/c she cried, but only for a minute after I left. I don't think you'd regret it. But I do encourage you to look for a two or three-day-a-week progam raher than something full time. My oldest was in full-time day care for the first three years of her life (I worked full-time) and I feel like I missed out on so much, although she is a wonderful, sweet girl. Good luck!

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M.W.

answers from Dallas on

I just wanted to say that you don't need to place a child into daycare or MDO for socialization. None of my children have ever been to so much as a day of outside-of-the-family care and so far so good. :) They're able to get along in the world & with others despite never having been in any type of institutional socialization. Infact, my eldest entered public school for the first time in first grade & was able to acclimate just fine. And my girls certainly aren't an exception. So I totally wouldn't worry that you'd be holding your child back or keeping him from anything by not putting him into care.

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