Teaching a 2 Year Old to Take Turns and Share

My daughter who i now 2 had a sharing problem for a little but it passed. We hang around kids that do and I believe that every child is different. However, I always preached(in a fun way) before we did anything out in public where their would be kids or at anybody's house to remember to share because its nice and that way you'll get to see and play with more toys and meet new friends. I had an Elmo book and Nick Jr. Yo Gabba Gabba video about sharing and that really worked. The main thing is is that youo HAVE to be so consistent on this issue like every other. Good Luck

Most 2 year olds are not cognitively and socially able to share yet. Sharing skills develop during the third year of life.

One thing you can do at home is model sharing and turn taking and practice, practice, practice.

I actually have an example from last night at our house. My son is also 2 years old and is unable to share. My husband was looking at his new Matchbox car and my son ripped it out of his hand. So we then practiced sharing the car with each other and asking, "Can I have the car please?"
It actually became a game and we passed it back and forth to each other and asked nicely!

Find any opportunity you can during the day to practice these skills and make it fun. Your child will be sharing in no time!

This probably isn't helpful, but it is really hard for kids this young to share. My experience is that you can only begin the process at this age, trying to talk sweetly and negotiate. I'd say to help them put away the toys they just won't share before company arrives, if that's the issue. Some things you might be able to have more than one of. It's a maturity issue more than anything.
Good luck!

Sharing is just not in a 2 year old's nature. Your best route is to lead by example, praise the successes, and gently discourage unacceptable behaviour. I have had success by enrolling my children in a local play group. (it was sponsored by our community enrichment office) It gave my kids the opportunity to be in a semi-structured environment where they could learn to interact with other children with parental guidance. (there was a "teacher" and activity centers featuring preschool skills)

If your community doesn't offer something like this, almost every library has a lapsit or story time program for parents and young children.

Good luck!

It's a waiting game; but what we do with my 3 year old and my 19 month old when they share really well is give them lots of praise. My son is learning to share and we started around 2 as well. When the baby has a toy he wants and he starts to throw a fit, I crouch down to his level and say, "Nayomi is playing with the truck right now. When she puts it down and picks up another toy, then you can play with the truck." If he calms down and plays with something else and doesn't take the toy from his sister, then after he eats his dinner, I give him a cookie instead of fruit and tell him, "this is for being such a big boy and sharing your toys with your sister." It seems to be working. Good luck.

I asked my sister about this who has 5 kids: 13, 11, 6, 5, 5. She said that she is still working on the sharing with all of them. She has had a slightly easier time with the younger two since they are twins. I guess I have no help for you, just letting you know to expect to be working on it for the long haul.

Dont know if this will help or not and i'm still working on it with my son who is 2.5yrs old and an only child, does not get out much and doesn't go to daycare. I just sit him down and tell him that if he doesnt share then when friends do come over they will not want to play with him and they will want to go home or go play with someone else. he's been doing a little better but if it gets bad i take the toy away and let him know he can't have it back till he learns to share.

Kids learn from examples (I am not saying you don't share)What I mean is show her how to share. Most kids especially at that age do not even understand what the word share means. Suggest taking turns with a specific toy so the child understands that she will get that toy back. At that age the child fears that the toy will not come back. If you set a 2 minute time limit and explain what will happen I have found that this works really well. I also try to explain how I share all my stuff with my kids. (this may be too much for a 2 year old though).

Didn't use love and logic, but the best way to teach is to demonstrate! Show your little one that it's her/his turn, then help her/him give the toy to you and tell her/him it's my turn now...the whole time repeating 'your turn' and 'my turn'. Repetition is the best teacher in this case...but remember, the child is only 2 so praise, praise, praise...even the slightest bit of progress!

~L.

We started playing REALLY simple games, like memory and moved up as he got a bit older (3.5 yrs now) to Candy Land, Shoots and Ladders etc. Try finding something you can do together, but make your child wait for you to take a turn. We also often would get one dessert (typically a smoothie or something like that) and would make him take turns with me. I get a sip, he gets a sip etc... good to start working on to set up the basics but like another mom said, they don't really get it until about 3-ish (developmentally not ready). Good luck!

Just keep working on it, teach by example Most 2 year olds just don't get it. Be patient.

N.:

I have 3 two year olds - the best thing is Love and time.

I make sure and bend down to thier level first. Or hold them and talk to them directly with a calm voice and make sure and give them a smile afterwards!

If they are absolutely not sharing, I simply let them know that each one gets 5 minutes, and I will time them each. I have found they actually wait for thier turns.

It just takes patience - and its not easy, it is easier to yell and put them in another room or ignore it - its harder to be a parent that takes the time, but I believe our patience will be rewarded.

M.

N.,

Children this age are pretty self-focused and not too interested in the feelings of others. The world revolves around them. All you can do is kindly intervene when you see your two year old not sharing as many times as it takes until he/she grows more aware that she is not the center of the universe. I don't believe in scolding, spanking or punishing a child for not sharing because they just don't get the concept yet. It has to be taught and that is your job as a parent, over and over again. Learning to share isn't like learning to read or right, there is no defined guidelines, it comes intuitively and children that young are still focused on self. I wish there were an easy answer but from what I learned after raising two to adults there is never an easy answer. Sorry to tell you the challenges only get bigger.

My best to you,
S.