Shocked by Daughters Drawings

This is the first time that I have responded to an inquiry. I felt 'compelled' to tell you that I really don't think you have anything to worry about. The 'parts' are just parts - in the right place, like she has probably seen on mommy and daddy.
Try dealing with this one....
The other day, I walk in on my 18 month old baby girl and her 4yr old brother playing in the family room. She has this BIG wad of toilet paper stuffed in the front of her shirt. I ask my son, "What is THIS???", he (without looking up from his Bob-The-Builder set) calmly says, "I put paper in her shirt to make her look like a REAL woman." (???!!!)
I didn't know whether to laugh or vomit....so I just walked back out of the room..... ;)

I agree with others, nothing alarming.. she is getting it.. what boys have and what girls have... i would just teach her they are private and you keep them Under clothes...

is your daughter in school?
I'd go in & talk to the school guidance counselor.
it's probably nothing, but...
6yr olds don't just get these ideas out of thin air- she most likely saw this somewhere...
I'd be curious to know where...
HTH
L.

I am glad that your daughter opened up to you and explained everything and my advice is to have a talk with the teacher just because the kids in the classroom should not be aware of any sort of favoritism toward students.The fact that your child knew that the teacher liked the other student enough for your kid to think she would not be believed is wrong. I have a six year old girl and I would definitely be at the school to solve the issue.

Certainly speak with her school or daycare provider. Maybe she saw a poster in the nurses office at school or found a book in the library that showed photos of men and women. Maybe you two can sit down and draw together and see if she will talk about it while she's drawing?

My daughter has been drawing private parts on people since she could draw the people. I hate it that she's so focused on things of a sexual nature, but just try to explain that if she must draw them to only do so at home. Sunday evening I brought her into big church with me & the entire time I was freaking out watching her, waiting for her to put the parts where they go on the people. When she didn't do it, I wanted to praise her for following our rules, but thought it best not to make a big deal just in case her "phase" is over??
I think some children are a little more precise in how they express themselves, is all. Like my daughter, yours is the oldest & has a brother (mine has 2). And you probably have a healthy outlook on nudity. No worries, the hoochie skirts and heels will just have to wait - HA!
Take care, B.

Hi S., hope all is going well with you and your family.

I also have a six year old daughter. A few months ago, an issue came up at her home daycare that she attends. She and another little girl (whom happens to be her cousin) had been drawing mermaids. On this particular day, they drew these mermaids without tops on. Of course, the babysitter had a major issue with this and my daughter was disciplined there for it. I strongly dissagreed with the fact that she was disciplined, but that is a different subject all together.

That evening at home, I discussed with my daughter the importance of keeping such drawings to the privacy of our home. I explained to her that those drawings were not appropriate for daycare, and so on. I never made her feel that she was in trouble with me here. I teach my daughters to be comfortable with themselves and am very open with them in every aspect (age appropriate of couse). Seeing mom without clothes on at home is nothing out of the ordinary, and is very common during times of rushing around to get ready to go somewhere.

Once in awhile she draws pictures of women, and once a man, without clothes. It doesnt concern me. As long as you are sure that she is safe, and isnt seeing certain things, than I would say everything is okay. Just curiousity, mom. Just wait, has she asked about sex yet? Thats when the real hard part begins, lol.

I feel you DO NOT NEED to be OVERLY concerned. I would do a research on all places she goes, but seriously, shes six, she has to have seen you naked,i mean its just natural. For two years, all of my daughters pictures had giant boobs on them! we laugh about it still. I always talk to my kids about that stuff, make sure theres no funny business, and keep clear lines of communication. But you might be scaring her if youfreak out, so bring it up in a normal tone and normal conversation. good luck and relax.

Hi S., first of all, you shouldn't feel embarrassed about asking such a question. Obviously it disturbs you enough to where you would need some feedback on it. In my opinion, sometimes children are just naturally curious about sexuality and unfortunately, other times, children are curious about sexuality because they have been innapropiately exposed to such things. Don't be quick to dismiss such behavior without doing some research. And like another response said, don't freak out about it because it will make her feel as if she did something "bad". Just be calm when approaching the situation. I don't intend to alarm you, but speaking from personal experience, SOMETIMES...and I really mean SOMETIMES... children who show this kind of behavior have underlying issues. Good luck S., and please don't feel embarrassed about the situation. You definitely must feel uneasy about something for some reason and you are a great mommy for being concerned. :)

I would say it is perfectly okay. There is nothing wrong with her understanding of the human anatomy, as long as it is appropriate. You talking with her and letting her know she isnt in any trouble was good. She sounds like a smart young girl and is just explore/learning the world around her. Just let her know that if she has any questions to come ask you. And that she can't draw stuff like that in school and stuff and the reasons why.

I would not be overly concerned. I think that is normal for kids to be curious about things like that. I also don't think it's odd for them to draw in parts that they think belong on a person. Some of suggested that she must have seen it somewhere, and she has, at home. Even at school she has probably seen others draw them. I would still keep an eye out for any other actions that may be disconcerting, or any major change in character, but if nothing else seems off I would just have a calm normal discussion about peoples differences. I would also ask her to keep drawings like this at home, and just explain that some people feel that private parts should be covered or not shown.

Just to be prepared I would also discuss the importance of things like not letting others look at or mess with those parts, because her private parts are private and shouldn't be messed with by others. That if anyone tries to do anything like that or anything that doesn't seem right she should always talk to you or dad about it. Also that if anyone tries to make her keep a secret about things like that, she should talk to you about it. Reassure her that she never has to be affraid to talk to you about things like this. I myself was very afraid to talk to my mom about such things, and anytime I did get the nerve to ask questions concerning anything like this it was quickly brushed aside and avoided.

I have to agree with everyone else, don't be too alarmed. As long as you asked the right questions (and you did), you can be assured that it is normal kid stuff...
My step mom is a substitute teacher and one day in 1st or 2nd grade the class was making pictures of dogs. One little girl drew a dog with all of it's parts! Needless to say it did not make it up on the wall outside of the class. When talking to the reg teacher and the child's mom, the child always drew everyone with their appropriate parts and did not have a dog at all! All the teachers thought it was hilarious, but I am sure the mom was embarassed but is hopefully laughing now.

i don't think you shouldn't be overly concerned. she is six. like the other lady said, she's sure to have seen you with no clothes on, and possably father too (she knows where the parts are supposed to be). kids are going to be curios of the differences between boys a girls. why are her brothers parts different than hers. when my son was in kindergarden i started talking to him about the bird's and the bee's. its never to early to start bringing up things like that. espicially in the times we live in now. they do make some good books for kids that explain differences in a very tasteful way. i actually live next door to a couple, they are lesbians, they have 2 kids artificial. which brought on alot of questions from my son when he was 5, because, doesn't it take a man and a woman to have a kid he would ask. i do agree if you feel it was more than out of the ordinary, investigate.

Its very important to make sure she isnt being exposed to sexual material or some perv., maybe it's just normal but these days nobody would blame you for investigating. It is the responsible thing for a parent to do, you are not being paranoid or jumping to conclusions, just investigating.

To draw them she must have seen 'something' - possibly nude photos or nude people - so try to find out where she learned how to draw the parts.

You could talk to her daycare and also the school should have a counselor to discuss it with, and they should be able to say if it's normal for her age and stage of development.

Keeping secrets from her Mom is a reason for concern. Keep trying to get her to tell you where she learned about the private parts, & try to find out if she knows much about what those body parts are 'used' for.

KIDS PICK UP STUFF LIKE THAT FROM OTHER KIDS, I'M SURE IT'S A PICTURE SHE SAW SOMEONE ELSE DRAW. HOWEVER MAKE SURE YOU KEEP AN EYE ON HER. HER CURIOSITY HAS BEEN PEAKED NOW YOU'LL HAVE TO KEEP A CLOSE EYE ON HER. PLEASE DON 'T GO TO SLEEP ON STUFF LIKE THIS,SOME PARENTS DO AND WHEN IT'S TO LATE THEN THEY REALIZE THE PROBLEMS.

P.

P.

Hi!! I am a 23 year old mother of 2 in SE Cape Coral looking to meet and make some friends. My husband and I moved over here from West Palm about 6 months ago or so and I haven't really had a chance to meet anyone or make any friends. I stay home with my two little ones, work for my husband part-time from home and run a daycare from our house. If you're interested in going to the park or something on a weekend (sounds like you're busy!) I would love a chance to meet some new people around here!

OK. I would def check to makes ure that nothing has happened to your daughter BUT. This is my issue. In America everyone is so concerned about children being exposed to nudity. It's like if someone sees a boob it's such a big deal! I come from Europe where people sun bathe topless and nudity is just natural. My daughter is 4 yrs old and sees me naked getting dressed all the time. She has asked me what my boobies are called and what they are for so I told her that they were to feed her with when she was a baby and to feed her brother who was breast fed for 4months and is now 7 months. She would go around the house when my son was crying saying "Mommy Lukas needs his boobie milk now" It was funny.... At 4 yrs old she knows the correct terminology for Vagina and Penis although she rather call her Vagina her PRIVATES and a Penis a Pee pee. But now that she knows and nudity has never been a big deal I have no problems with her. I'm sure your daughter is not thinking of the naked body as sexual. She is just exploring the differences in the gender of the species with no sexual connotations attached to it. I would not be concerned at all.

If you are concerned yo should talk to a professional, someone who has dealt with things like this. Not someone who will put ideas into her head, but someone who could either give you advice or just talk to her in the right way. Regardless, I'd keep a close eye on her when she is with other children. My sister-n-law found her son in the closet with one of his close friends (both 5 years old) and one came out with an erection. She freaked out. When she questioned her son she said that his friend asked him to touch him. I have a good friend who is a child psychologist up in Boynton and she talked to him and said it was probably nothing, but to stay away from the other child, or at least not leave them alone when they were together. If it was me, I would get professional advice on how to handle it. Even if she does not see the professional, you'll know what is the best way to react and the right things to ask. I would not take a chance, even if it is probably nothing.

You have nothing to be embarrassed about. You do have good reason to be concerned though. If no one has exposed themselves to her... how did she know what to draw and where to draw it? I would definitely take stock of who she has been around (neighborhood kids, family, friends, etc), and ask yourself if any of them has had the opportunity to be inappropriate with her. If so, ask her about the time she spends with these people (no leading questions though). It may just be normal curiosity, but I wouldn't just write it off as that without pressing the issue a little bit more.

If it makes you feel any better when I was in kindergarten my mom said I did the same thing for no reason. Sorry about your divorce. I was also that age when my parents went through a divorce and my mom and I did wonderful! And she eventually met a wonderful man. www.DiscoveryToysLink.com/LisaRyan LisaM