Seeking Advice/resources to Help with New Baby Transition/avoid Sibling Rivalry

I have two boys that are roughly three years apart. I have learned that they are and will be naturally competitive. Dr. Kevin Lehman's book The New Birth Order Book helped me and so did Dobson's Bringing Up Boys. We have always emphasized a strong relationship between the two and encouraging them to be best friends. This took time. They are now 4 and 7 and they share a room. They are best friends now and hate to sleep apart. Does this mean they never fight or squabble? Of course not! Now we are teaching them to work together to solve their differences.
Best advcie for the short-term---three year olds love to help and be considered "big". Get him involved. Practice on a stuffed bear what it looks like to take care of baby brother. Let him have special big boy privileges (ie: slightly later bed time or two books at nap time instead of one). God will give your family grace to add this newest one!

I have a girl (3) and a boy (19 months) I am sure rivalry will come with time, but for now just love on them as much as possible. Read up and get great advice, but remember no to children are alike so there is no perfect solution. I came froma family of three 2 girls 1 boy and we never had any problems. I guess my mother did a great job I need to ask her how she did it. I do remember that she never compared us (which is hard) always told us each and everyday how special we were and how much she loved us. Our father did the exact same so I we grew up very confident. If you do this then your children will have no reason to compete with each other. I would buy Steve Chapman (sp?) 10 Things I Want My Son to Know. My husband read it and I read the girl one. I loved it and hopefully you will love it as well. My doctor told me when my son was born all he really needs is to be loved, feed and cleaned. They sleep so much just remember your older son will need you a little more.

You can only avoid sibling rivalry by not having more than one child.

To help minimize it just try to make him as much a part of it as possible, and provide him with his own alone time with you each day, even it's only a few minutes.

Also, this is advice for pets that I heard much later after I had my 3 kids, so I couldn't try it on them, but it sounded interesting.

The advice was... make the time the baby was awake a great time for the pet. Give him treats, pat him, play with him. And when the baby sleeps, leave the pet alone. Now I'm not saying to do this on your child, but I had thought that maybe if I'd heard it when it would've counted for me, that I might have tried a modified version on them. Just a thought.

My DH and I have read Bringing up Boys - James Dobson. It has helped me better understand men in general. :)
I have two boys who are 20 months apart. I made sure that when I was feeding his brother that the oldest had something special to do or his own baby to feed so that he would feel involved. I think involving them is a big part of the process. If they feel like you are always pushing/keeping them away from the baby, then they feel left out and angry at the baby. The oldest got to hug, touch and hold as much as was reasonable. My boys are now best friends, they will fight over toys and the usual stuff, but they are very close.
You will love it - congratulations!
L.