My 14Month Old Will Not Sleep in Her Crib

Honestly I let all my babies sleep with me, it just seemed so much more natural and it broke my heart to think of my little baby waking up alone at night... I don't even like sleeping alone!

That being said :D, this is a decision only you can make, and it needs to be made based on your personal feelings & needs. Once you've decided where she's sleeping, you have to be resolute.

If you really want her sleeping in her own bed, make that decision (remember that to 'decide'means to cut yourself off from any other option), and take the steps to make that happen.

1. Make sure you spend lots of cuddle time with her before bed, read her a story or whatever you do in your little bed time routine with her. This will send a clear signal that she is loved & truly cared for, which is very important. And Explain to her (you'd be amazed at how much these little guys 'get', even if they don't understand all of the words.

2. Proceed to put her to bed in her crib/bed and tuck her in, perhaps get a new bedtime buddy to ease the transition, and leave... Really. Even though she cries, you must stay resolute & not give in, and once she sees that you are serious & there's nothing she can do about it, she will accept the situation & learn to live with it. Now is a good time to get out a box of tissues... you may need them.

You could also plan something you can do in the room with the lights down low, such as read a book, organize, etc. This will send her the signal that you are 'there' & therefore are not 'abandoning' her, but are still the boss & things must be done your way. She may cry, kick, throw toys, etc. Remain calm through this and ignore the behavior. Eventually, she will get tired (especially if she is crying), and she will fall asleep.

This will take approximately 3 days (I have done this with several babies I cared for, including a set of twins), but in the end they come to understand two very important things:

1. That you are the boss.
2. Their crying or ill behavior is not going to make you change your mind.
3. That they are still loved.

It is very important that you show her lots of extra love during this time (during the day) to reassure her that even though you are having to be strict & set some boundaries, you absolutely and completely love her & are there for her. And remember (through your tears)that setting standards & boundaries for your child is the cornerstone of having a happy & loving family experience!

I heard something once from the dog whisperer that I thought applied very well to children as well. He said that you have to establish discipline first(for children translate to setting standards & enforcing them), and then love.(And there are s And he said that most people try to do it the other way around, and end up with disaster because their pets just run wild while they are trying to be a 'loving parent'. I have four children who are completely happy, intelligent, and well adjusted & behaved. I get so many compliments on them and I know it is because I have loved them deeply & upheld & enforced my family's values & standards with them.

Best wishes to you, A., and don't give up!

Sincerely,

E. :)

I just went through that with my 17month old after her first ear infection and molars coming in at the same time. She did better with me just sitting (or laying when I was tired) by her crib. I rock her, put her in her crib and sit beside her so she knows I am there but am choosing not to pick her up. I started Monday and by last night she was in her crib all night sleeping through the night again. She cried the first night on and off for 40 minutes, 20 the second night and didn't really cry at all last night. The longer you wait, the harder it will be. The important this is to stick with it. No contact or talking, just reassuring presence.

I know this will be hard, but you may have to put her in her crib and let her cry for a bit. Go back in her room, after maybe 10 minutes, and reasure her (don't pick her up) then leave. I had to do the same with my son when he was about that age. It took about 2 nights and then he was sleeping in his own bed again.

I had kinda the same problem with one of my twin girls. I had to just let her cry in the crib. I would go in every 5-10 minutes and let her know that I was here but that she needed to be in her bed. After about 40 agonizing minutes she went to bed! After a few days she was back to normal. Now a whole year later she does not even want to sleep in my bed if I offer. She loves her room and bed!
Good Luck!!