Mother Seeking Advice

I think what I would do is take my child out if I had concerns about the care my child is getting, but at the same time I would try to help this lady if I could in other ways.
(You shouldn't feel bad for doing something you feel is best for your daughter. )
I would definitely try my best to help this lady through some of her rough times, if I had the resources to do so, and it dosen't have to be $$$$$$$-- I don't know her whole story and everything she's going through but I bet you could help her in other ways.
Good luck.

You child's well being should come first...no bad feelings should be invloved when doing what's best for her.

You certainly are empathic about this lady's situation. I agree with a previous response that your child's safety and care should come first. You might, first, tell this lady that you have some concerns. If she is able to change this disconcerting behavior, maybe she can put her personal life to the evenings - outside of the time she should be doing her day care job.

Personally, it doesn't sound like she will be able to do that. Still, it will feel better to warn her than to up and skip out on her.

Good luck!

I think you should have a heart-to-heart talk with your friend and tell her that, if you were in the same situation, you would seek a full-time job until things stabilized. She has a lot going on, on many different fronts. She needs to focus on all of that so her divorce can go smoothly, so her injuries can heal. A full-time job will at least give her a constant paycheck (maybe even health benefits?) that she can depend on and budget for, as well as lift the worry about finding new clients. And if she was in a bad accident, I'm sure her doctors have told her not to pick up anything over 10lbs (that's what they told me!)... So running her own child-care which requires lifting children is probably not the best environment for her.

She could probably get a job in a daycare, working with older children who don't require being picked up. Or perhaps she can work as a Nanny.

Once everything stabilizes, she can then reopen her home childcare.

if you really feel your daughter isn't getting the care she needs, then that is your top priority! stepping on someone's toes or whatever takes a far 2nd from your daughter's well-being. may sound harsh, but it's my honest opinion.

As you stated the daycare worker has her troubles, but your obligation goes to your daughter. I understand you want to help the worker, but right now the help you give will not make her situation better. You will feel bad, but think of your daughter; she is the most important thing you have.

With all that your childcare provider has going on in her life, I can't imagine that she's able to give anyone, including your child, 100% dedication and focus, which is what your child deserves. If I were in your situation and I had the concerns that you've expressed, I'd find another childcare arrangement ASAP. Like the other mothers said, your child's well-being comes first. I know how you feel...not wanting to make a bad situation worse for the caregiver, but I'd still put my child's needs first.