An odd question, what do you say to your child when you need to get away? I have times where I am just so stressed and need to step away for a moment. My friend tells her two girls "Mommy needs a time out." Have you found anything that works for you? My son doesn't understand that phrase, and I'm looking for one that works.
On a lighter note, do you have a weekly/daily tradition with your kids? My son and I find and bake a different cookie recipe every Saturday. If so, has it brought you closer together?
"Just give me a minute, ok? I am not feeling very good right now, & I just need a minute by myself."
Each weekend for at least one of the weekend days, husband, kiddo, & I eat breakfast/brunch while watching Doctor Who on Netflix, & then we play board games.
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S.W.
answers from
Detroit
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Great question.
My DS, now 13, learned the word decompress quite a few years ago. He knows that means I need some time to myself and he should be independent for a little while and/or ask his Dad if he absolutely needs adult intervention. The time has grown over the years but it's usually between 30 to 60 minutes. One word?? Homework. :-) S
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J.C.
answers from
Philadelphia
on
"Unless the house is on fire or you are bleeding profusely, give me a few minutes of peace" 😉
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G.♣.
answers from
Springfield
on
You could say you need a break or a moment to yourself. I think using the term "time-out" implies that you've done something wrong or that you are about to lose your cool. I know sometimes I need a break when I'm about to lose my cool! For the most part, I just tell my boys that I need a minute to myself. If they question that, I let them know that I'm starting to get overwhelmed, and if I don't get a minute to myself I'm afraid I'll get upset with them. My oldest is 8, so he very much understand what I"m saying. My youngest is 5, and he kind of gets it.
If kids know a break makes for a happier mommy, they will support you.
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S.T.
answers from
Washington DC
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i don't think i ever had a set phrase. it was more something along the lines of JC's 'unless the house is on fire, leave me alone. i'll be reading in my room.'
i love the cookie recipe idea! if i'm ever blessed with grandkids and they're close enough for me to spoil, i'm totally stealing it.
we did breakfast as well as bedtime stories. my poor boys got read to a LOT! they loved weekends when daddy was on deck, and often had one-on-one daddy/bebop and daddy/dink adventures. but i can't recall any particular weekend specific ones with me (but i often worked on weekend nights.)
i also love canuck's sunday night WD ritual. now that the boys are gone, it's my own treat. sunday is my ironing night, and i despise ironing, so i entice myself to get it done with WD and a special snack of some sort. i am so bereft when it's off the air and i'm all caught up on netflix!
:) khairete
S.
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S.G.
answers from
Grand Forks
on
I just say "I would like to be alone right now. Do not disturb me unless it is really important."
We have lots of traditions. I cook a big supper every Sunday, with dessert, and we watch The Walking Dead together after. We hug and kiss good night and say "I love you" at bedtime.
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B.C.
answers from
Norfolk
on
On one occasion when our son was a toddler I said "Mommy needs a nap".
He said "I don't want a nap".
I said "You don't have to but I'm going to go lay down. If you can be quiet you can go with me".
He always had to be with me so he came with me and before you know it we BOTH had a nice long nap and felt much better afterward.
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*.*.
answers from
New London
on
If you use time out for discipline, I would not use the same term for your time to step away !
Gidget said it great---Keep it simple and short.
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H.W.
answers from
Portland
on
Mine is seven; I just tell him "I need a break from talking. Please go play/I'm going upstairs and just need a bit of quiet." Then I put on a timer so he knows when I'm available again. Usually 10-15 minutes tops.
I like baking with Kiddo, but don't do it too often-- more in spurts to use up our berries and cherries from the garden. But we have daily traditions: walks to and from school when I am solely focused on him, "ice cream/smoothie pop walks" when we go outside and saunter around the neighborhood on a pleasant evening with his dessert. And those heart-conversations right before bed. All of those are opportunities for conversations, so we can stay connected at transition times. They let me know what's on his mind, in his heart, and help him to feel more secure.
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S.H.
answers from
St. Louis
on
"I am going to hide in my room. Do not disturb me."
Tradition...too many to list!
But daily, I'd say it would be the dog care. When my sons were younger, they had to spend time wearing out the dog. I joined in & it was fun.
Weekly, up until maybe 6 or 7...we'd do recycling together. Sorting, piling, etc was actually fun...especially throwing the glass in the big bins!
Seasonally, we'd take rides to "look for signs of Spring/Fall/etc". Great way to get to know your locale. (small town excitement)
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M.G.
answers from
Phoenix
on
I love the idea of baking with your kids! how awesome. I loved including my kids at any age in the kitchen. The Kitchen is the heart of the home. I use to say Mommy needs a time out-because lets face it time outs don't really work for the kids they are always more to our benefit. Check out this free online event: http://www.amotherstimeoutglobalgathering.com/
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L.U.
answers from
Seattle
on
"get away from me"
No no....seriously.
I will often say, "I need a break!!! Please do not bother me unless you are bleeding or the house is on fire" (usually said as I am heading to the bathroom, sigh)
I don/t know how old your kid is, but mine are 3, 9, and 12, and they ALL get it when I say, "Get away."
(Disclaimer: I LOVE my kids...but sometimes I just need 5-10 minutes alone)
L.
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M.C.
answers from
Norfolk
on
I say "Mommy needs some quiet time". Usually I can throw on a movie for them or send them to their playroom.
No weekly/daily traditions here!
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S.S.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
I need some quiet time. My children are drawn to me when I try to do that:)
Every Saturday morning we swim together. I hope it brings us closer. It's a good time to work off some energy and play games in the water together.
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G.B.
answers from
Oklahoma City
on
I'll be back in a little bit. I have some other things to do right now.
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C.B.
answers from
San Francisco
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I just say it's "my time." They've been told that that's why they have a bed time - it's more for me than it is for them - adult time. Now not only do they have a bedtime, but they also have "room time" which is a time before bed time that they must go to and stay in their rooms. I got that from a poster on this cite who said her kids go to their rooms at 8:00 every night. I love that! I do 8:30.