Keeping It in the Family.....

I think lots of people do this type of thing. If they don't think it's weird, why should you? Just wish them the best.

My thought is "she found a better match" and it doesn't really matter to me if she dated one brother and then the other as long as she didn't date them at the same time. I put it in a similar category of dating someone in the same close social circle and that happens all the time.

Don't see it as a problem.

As long as they are okay with it, I don't see any problem.

at first I thought you meant marrying HER younger brother....that would have been awkward.

If the brothers don't have a problem, I don't see why you would.

It happens! My FIL dated my MIL's sister before he dated her. There were no hard feelings, as a matter of fact the family joked about it often.

I don't think anything of it. It's fine. I don't even consider it weird.

Not optimal but unless she dumped the older brother for the younger brother, I don't see the problem if both brothers are ok with it. These things happen. If she and the younger brother are a great match, I'd just be happy for them.

Yeah, why not. Obviously there's something about the way those brothers were brought up (they probably resemble each other too, and that may be her "type") that is very attractive to her. If the older one wasn't her perfect guy, maybe the younger one is. Why should she let go of her perfect guy just because she once dated his older brother?

my SIL married my husbands older brother after my husband did pretty much all throughout high school. It was a little odd at the beginning and now I dont even think about it.

It's not for me to be judgmental about. I don't think anything about it except that peopIe meet their spouses in countless different ways. It's not like she's marrying her own brother or there was cheating going on. So why would you judge it as weird or gross or spend any time thinking about it beyond, "Good for my husband's cousin!"

I'm sorry, I just really find your attitude about this to be really juvenile.

somewhat unlikely, i guess, but nothing wrong with it at all. i don't understand why it weirds you out.
khairete
S.

it's creepy-I guess no one will be shocked when she moves on to the next guy and his family? She sounds like a real....

First, not my place to judge. Second, and since you asked opinions, I don't see the harm. If all involed parties are ok with it, why should it be an issue? Weird? Certainly it is.....but who cares? Maybe the younger brother had the missing qualities the girl was looking for in the older bro.....best of both worldsif you think about it! :o)

I've heard of weirder, and worse.

I mean, yeah, she slept with the two men at different points in her life, but, really, when I think of past boyfriends, I don't instantly think "OMG, I had SEX with this guy!" I mean, sure it crosses my mind, but not frequently and certainly not immediately.

It actually reminds me of Little Women, but with sisters instead of brothers -- Jo and Laurie and Amy. And presumably no premarital sex involved ;)

I dated an older guy for a couple of years and turns out I really like his younger brother way more. It was a clue. But geography separated us all too much and our outcomes were different.

Not weird S., just honest. I doubt there was much sleeping going on towards the end anyhow.

I guess when I read it I originally thought, "Meh...no big deal!" But that is because it doesn't register in my mind that they had sex and were that intimately involved. My mind doesn't go that route because that is not how I "dated". My husband and I saved intimacy for marriage.

Sooooo, yes. It would be a bit strange. But I guess I would just be glad they weren't married and had kids then divorced and moved on down the family tree.

Soooo, yes it is a bit uncomfortable for everyone else. But as long as it is cool with the brothers and they are cool with having "shared" her then no one else should be bothered. One big positive is the older brother can always give great advice....because of how emotionally and physically involved he was with her first.

Ugh. My BIL recently married my husband's first serious girlfriend, who he dated for more than 3 years. My husband is NOT OK with this and we avoid small family gatherings where we can't avoid being in close proximity to them. I think it's creepy, gross, and immature. Find a partner who hasn't already f-d your own brother, right?

My first thought was that is really weird. Then I remembered a girl S who dated my oldest brother. My mom and I both thought the girl S was better for the younger of the two brothers! Although the girls heart was broken by the older brother and wouldnt be bothered to have to see him around durring the holidays I doubt either of my brothers would have been offened or thinking it was seconds to date the girl. I agree that is very odd.

As long as the brothers are OK with it, I would be OK with it.

My college roomate dated a guy casually for about 6 months and then married his younger brother several years later. Problems arose because they didn't tell the younger brother or the older brother's wife. Essentially... the secret broke their marriage and it was unnecessary.

Strange, but not unheard of at all.

Heard of it a few times. Seems to only cause problems if they don't let the sibling know up front. I would think that may be an awkward convo...

I know a girl that dated one guy and then married his twin...