R.M.
I am struggling with how to answer this question and not sound ridiculously light hearted or flippant...because I do NOT mean to be that way at all..I have struggled with family issues during my 61+ years..a daughters' .teenage pregnancy,a daughters attempted suicide, another daughters divorce and marital issues with my husband of 41+years. I do know that the way to survive these times is not to lose sight of the fact that EVERYTHING in your life isn't a negative...you have to look for the positive things and spend as much time focusing on them as you do focusing on the negatives. I don't know what type of difficulties your daughters is experiencing but count your blessings that you are able to quit your job to be there for her!!! How many families would never be able to give up one income for a significant period of time? Can you imagine dealing with this and holding down a full time job at the same time?? Your MIL is having difficulties adjusting to her new surroundings BUT she has a loving family that is there to be supportive and loving...and she will adjust eventually...it just may take a while longer than you would like. I wonder if it would be easier if your MIL and FIL were in a joint facility...even if one was in the nursing home wing and the other were in the assisted living wing...at least they could spend time together without you having to be the transportation.
You need to be patient with your husband....he is dealing with all of these issues too..and as you probably know...men deal with things SO much differently than we women do!!! He is probably feeling like a bit of a "failure" because he isn't "in control" of everything...so many times men see family difficulties as "their fault" or somehow at least something that should have foreseen and avoided all together!!!
Your daughter leaving for college is a big step for her...and for you!!! Concentrate on the new adventure...see if she wouldn't love a girls day at the mall...shopping for the things she needs to supplement what she already has there at home for her new dorm room or apartment. Sit down with her and make a cook book of some of her favorite "comfort foods" that she can prepare while she is away at college to help ease those homesick evenings.
But...don't forget about yourself!!! And your marriage!!! Make date nights with your hubby...I am sure that money is a little tight since you have quit your job...but plan times together that don't hurt your budget too much. Rent a couple of movies, and spend the evening together cuddling on the sofa as you enjoy them. Go for a long walk together, talk about all of the good things that you have in your life and remind yourselves why you fell in love in the first place.
And for yourself...pamper yourself...find a good book that you have been wanting to read...or spend an afternoon at the local day spa....call a girlfriend and make a lunch date...something to make yourself smile and feel good about your self!!!
FInd a good friend that you can trust to share your worries and fears with...a trouble shared is a trouble halved!!! You can do it...just take it one day at a time....one minute at a time if that is what you need....keep putting one foot in front of the other and you will come out on the other side of this!! I promise!!!