Help with My 2 Year Old!

M.,

First of all, congrats on your pending delivery! I have a two year old daughter who is dealing with these same issues. She is my first so I'm still trying to figure this out as I go. Potty training has been a sometimes thing for us so far. I wouldn't worry about it too much just yet. As long as you're introducing it and giving him opportunities to try, that's what is important. He'll take to it when he is ready.
Pacifier, well, we're still doing that too. We HAVE restricted it to bedtime/naptime and make her put it in her bed when she wakes up. She whined for a day or so at first, but then she accepted it. I think we'll probably start taking it away for naps soon.
Sleeping, she sometimes comes to bed with us when she is not feeling well (and when we are too tired to get her back down). Is he still in a crib? On nights when she does wake up, most of the time she just needs a drink of water or her binky back and then she will go back to sleep. If he is still in a crib I would go in and comfort him without picking him up and get him to lay back down and then just leave. He might cry a little bit but eventually he'll get the idea and go back to sleep.

I hope this helps. Good luck!

M.

I wouldn't try to change anything until after the baby comes.
About the sleeping with you just tell him he needs stay in his own bed. Good luck.

I would say eliminate the pacifier. He'll probably fuss a little more the first couple days, but he just needs to find something to substitute. Maybe pick up a new stuffed animal that you give him each time. Even if he throws it down, he'll eventually decide to either go with it or choose something else. We could never quite understand the whole paci issue for some people. What's to train? You either give it to them or you don't. If you don't want them to have it, then get rid of it. Yes, they may fuss a little, but they'll get over it and really it's only as hard on you as you let it be.

As for potty training I would just keep being consistent at using the potty. One day he'll decide on his own to really do it. At this age it's more about wanting to decide for themselves is where their resistance stems from. So if we provide the consistency then they'll come along.

I am in a parenting class and they say to ignore the tantrums. I just had a baby and my daughter does the same thing. Just make sure he knows that you understand how he is feeling. Have empathy for him but don't let him control things. I didn't have to start over with my daughter. Every child is different, just do what you feel is best for your child.

M.-
I have to say that with my first one having a baby was the greatest thing. She wanted to show her baby sister that she was a big girl...We never had an issue with the biki because we had already taken that away, but the potty training she was determined to be a BIG GIRL!! But that was her decision! She was just wanting a duty when the baby was born so she titled herself the diaper getter. She was also 18 months old when the second baby got here so we were really excited to have only one in diapers. Now I am having baby #3 and things aren't so easy! My middle daughter is not interested in the new baby. She refuses to go potty in the potty chair and she wants to sleep in the babies room (that used to be her room). I say that things are so easier to dod them when they are ready. I have never pushed potty training when they are ready they will go.
I would however push the big boy thing for the pacifire...I would tell him that the baby will need them so we should get rid of them. It is always better to have them gather them and toss them. With Easter coming here is an idea... Gather all the pacifires and laeve them for the Easter Bunny...Then next morning there will be a suprise. Good Luck

Dear M. T.,
I have the same problem with my 8 year old grandson, he still sleeps with grandma & grandpa. When he is with his mother he sleeps in his own bed and his own room. Please try to break him out of this as soon as possible.I think it is too late for us. Now I let him have a friend stay the night and that helps alot. He doesn't want other kids to know that he sleeps with us. When friends stay over he will not sleep in our bed.
My son slept with me till he was 5. I would sometimes get up and put him back to bed at least 5 times a night. But I would get very little sleep. Maybe you can give that a try. I tried everything!!!! Finally I started letting him have a friend for a sleep over. That seemed to help.
As for the temper I would say this is soooooo normal. I always said 2's are the terrible 2's, but 3's are TRIBLE TROUBLE. But 4's it will get better.
As for potty training I can't help you there. I have never had good luck with this.
A little about myself- I am a recently retire 46 year old with 4 grown children (ages 31,28,25, 23) and 10 grandchildren and one on the way. I am also raising my neices daughter since 10 months old, now she is 12. I have also 3 grandchildren that leave with us.
Best Wishes,
D.