Have 2 Babies and a 3Rd on the Way Freaking Out!!

I had a 15-month-old and a newborn, and then #3 came not too much later. Now we have 5 close together all under 7.
Lots of tot programs and preschool! I am at home with them and getting out helps a lot.

You could always adopt out the baby. SO many people who cannot have their own desperately want a baby.

It's hard, but it's a viable alternative.
Dawn

If you don't think you can deal with a third child and you don't want to abort, you could consider putting it up for adoption.
I would also consider a different method of birth control than whatever you're currently using, since it isn't working.

As a Catholic, I must tell you that I don't think you should go with an abortion. You have a living human being inside you that you and your husband created. You should consider adoption if you don't think you can raise it. However, I think you can:

3 babies won't cost that much more than 2. If your youngest is 1 yr, you should still have all if not most of the gear, crib, high chair, infant car seats, baby clothes etc.... You could breastfeed or pump to save on formula costs. Buy generic diapers and find ways to cut costs.

It will be stressful caring for 3 little ones, but you can do it. Many people have done it before you.

Best wishes!

My mother aborted her third child. It makes me sad that she did that. Having an unexpected child is hard but if I were you, I would have him/her. After that, get your tubes tied or your husband a vasectomy.

Have you considered adoption?

Girl, you hang in there! The news is still new and fresh. See if you can get someone to watch the kids...I'm sure some grandma or nursery worker at your church would watch the kids so you can have at least a morning or afternoon of peace and quiet. that is what the church is for - to minister those in need...and you are definitely in need!

Yes, God doesn't give us more than we can handle. Even when we think we can't handle it, that's when we are to turn to Him and find the strength to keep going, even if you are trying to survive day by day or in some cases, minute by minute. If life were easy, then noone would ever have a need for Him and in turn, no one would ever see how He can work in amazing ways.

As a fellow sister in Christ, I can't advocate or encourage you to have an abortion. As one who has lost a baby, I would encourage you to give up your baby to a woman who wants your baby and will love and cherish your baby. Search your heart, obey the Lord and and above all else, do what you will be able to live with 1 year from now, 5 years from now, 10 years from now, and so on.

Prayers for you and your precious baby.

My oldest three are 15, 14 and 13. If you choose to keep the baby, you can handle it. Will it be stressful? Yep. Will it be hard? You betcha. Can you make it work? Absolutely.

If you sit down, figure out that it's possible financially, or something else is preventing you from considering keeping the baby, then consider adoption. Open adoption is a wonderful thing!

Good luck!

I had a 2 year old, a 1 year old and and infant...not by choice! We had a couple of hard years.

Trust me when I say I was freaking out! I cried for months. I didn't know how I was going to handle it...God gave me strength. Shortly after my 3rd was born, I was diagnosed with two autoimmune diseases that were life altering. By God's grace, I had my third baby already, because the doctor told me I couldn't safely have anymore children.

We got through it. They are now all school aged and are best friends. They tell everyone that they are each others best friends and life is easy (most of the time) and wonderful.

If you ever need someone to talk to or any encouragement, please feel free to PM me.

I have a friend that has 4 under 5 right now. Her oldest will be 5 soon, but she literally has just been popping out the babies. A neighbor down the street has 4 under 5 right now too. These women are much younger than me, but they seem to be managing it.

My friend said getting a mother's helper for a few afternoons a week was a lifesaver when baby three came. She hired a 10 year old neighbor child, and the mom and her split the girl's wages. Maybe you can find a kid that could help you out a bit?

L.:

WELCOME TO MAMAPEDIA!!!

I know it sounds funky - but CONGRATULATIONS!!!

You need to talk with your OB/GYN. Since you are a Christian - I would STRONGLY suggest that you contact your Priest/Pastor to talk with him about your situation.

There are other options other than abortion - you can put your baby up for adoption.

You are right that God does not give us more than we can handle. We may bend, but we will never break. Pray on it. It's a shock right now...start looking at finances closely - go to the library and borrow books from Dave Ramsey or Suze Orman - so that you have control of your finances instead of them controlling you - once you find out that you might be able to afford this one (your oldest should be potty training soon - so the money you are spending on diapers really won't change - you could try stocking up - buying on sale with coupons (that's what I did!!)

Get your ducks in a row. Get a plan and COMMUNICATE. Do not shut each other out. This child is BOTH of yours. Yes, it's your body - but it's BOTH of yours child.

Good luck!! While I don't know you - I know that you will make the right decision for you and your family after doing some planning, research, soul searching...and LOTS AND LOTS of communicating...

Contact your church. They may have counseling, they may have support of some kind. Just the ability to talk to someone would probably help you. And you never know, there may be a childless couple in your church that would be blessed by this child if you feel it's too much to handle. Or there may be someone like a grandma that would help out. I wish you the best.

you'll get through-don't turn down any offers for help-before you know it, you'll being driving them to college!

My kids are (now) 7, 6 and 4. The first two are 20 months apart, then the last one came along 22 months after #2.

SO - I had 3 kids aged 3 and under...

I was fine.

Advice - don't worry about it. Will it be easy? No. Will it be terrible - heck now. I love my kids close in age. They play great together, they are all "into" the same things - meaning - no one is left behind in play or family activities.

Good luck!

L.,

My oldest just turned three this month, my youngest is 21 months and #3 is due in April. Both #2 and #3 were surprizes. I felt the exact same feelings of anxiety and stress. My husband and I spent a good four months in a total state of denial after finding out that we are pregnant again. But . . . it does get better. Recently, my daughters have been playing more independently and also playing nicely together. It just seems like they don't need me quite so much as they did when they were one and two.

I also look at my second daughter and when I think about how miserable I was to be pregnant with her and how much joy she brings me now. . . well ,I just assume that the same thing will happen with number #3! Hang in there and give yourself time to adjust to the news! Please feel free to PM me.

My friend has kids that are currently 4, 6, 7, and 8. The three oldest are each less than a year apart (oldest was 22 months when third was born). The total time from the first birth to the last is only 3 years, 9 months. Number 2 is her only boy.

Anyway, it was definitely hard in the beginning to juggle all the kids and outings were incredibly difficult. The older they got, the easier it became. The kids always have playmates so they aren't bored. They fight like any other siblings.

You'll make it work. It will be a big adjustment and won't be easy at first, but you can do it. For your own sanity, see if you can get some help/babysitting a couple of days a week (maybe trade with a friend or neighbor), once the the little one is about six months. Trust me - you'll need some time to yourself!

I had a 3yo, 2yo, 1yo and newborn. We wanted it that way. Was it wild?
You bet. Was it worth it, for sure. Everyday was an adventure! There was always someone to play with. We had a routine and stuck to it. Would do it the same way if I could turn back time. They are now adults with families of their own and very close. You can do it.

My oldest are 13, 12, 10. 16 months apart, then 23 months apart. and I went and did it again I have a 2 year old and a 1 year old that are 14 months apart. So it's something you will survive.

My kids are 25 months and 13 months. I never wanted kids so close together. I never thought I could manage it. But you just do it. What saved me was breastfeeding and using cloth diapers with both of them. Saved us lots of money. The youngest also inherits all of the older one's clothes and toys.

You can do it! My oldest were one and two when our 3rd was born. Now they are 7, 6, almost 5, and we have a 1 year old. Looking back, I found the hardest year of parenting to be the one you're in right now, having a 1 and 2 year old. The third coming along can't make things much crazier than they already are. Sometimes life sends you just what you need. We were unsure about #4 but can't imagine our world without him, he makes our family complete! Good luck and enjoy the ride, I really can't believe my 3rd is off to kindergarten next year.