Effects of Abortion - Added Question

I have known 4 women who had abortions at some point and all of them have at least 2 children.now that they gave birth to.. Interesting, none of them ever had miscarriages either.

. And had no problems getting pregnant when they were ready..

I think the concerns over botched abortions causing infertility are history. I don't that should be her point of decision. Is she too far along for the abortion pill?

If her heart says she really doesn't want one, then there's her answer. She shouldn't have an abortion. She should start investigating her options, be they placing a child for adoption or finding out what help her family qualifies for with 2 children. For example, she may qualify for help with daycare, WIC or other services.

I had an abortion. It was my first semester of college and though I can't prove anything, I'm convinced the guy slipped something into my drink based solely on the way I felt, it wasn't like being drunk but it was like I was heavy, hard to move. That's not really important but I thought I'd mention it because people get judgmental (and trust me, you can flame all you want but I know I made the RIGHT choice FOR ME at the time).

So yes, I put myself in a bad situation and was taken advantage of and I paid the price. A few weeks later I found out I was pregnant. I scheduled the abortion and I'm not going to lie, even knowing it's the right thing it's still hard. It's hard because for the rest of your life you have to answer "# of pregnancies" on your medical history and check that box that says "abortion". It's hard because you sit in a room at the clinic with a bunch of other girls scheduled to have the same thing done. It's hard because you sit in that recovery room and imagine everyone is judging you. But, in time, you get over it. I healed and didn't have any issues. I finished college and got a good job, I married a nice man and 15 years after the abortion I was ready for a baby. I didn't have any issues with the pregnancy, my baby was born healthy, and the only lasting problem from the abortion is the shame I feel for having put myself in that situation in the first place.

As long as she is doing what SHE decides to do, no matter what anyone around her is saying, then she can come to terms with it herself. She'll be fine in time. If she is willing to endure 9 months of pregnancy and surrender the baby, that's fine, but that has its own issues - there will forever be a child out there, no matter how loving the adoptive parents are, that will wonder about her and may even try to find her one day. If she is like me and believes that an abortion is fine, people miscarry all the time at far further stages than a month or even two, that bringing a life into the world knowing you can not support it emotionally or financially is wrong, maybe she'll choose abortion. Maybe she'll decide to have the baby and deal with whatever course that sets her life on. It is her demon to fight, no matter which path she takes it's going to be hard. As a friend, the best thing you can do is remind her that the decision is hers and no matter what you will not judge her choice because NO ONE knows her capabilities or her life in the way that she does, and NO ONE has the right to tell her she is doing the right or the wrong thing.

Physically, as someone who had an abortion and then later went on to have a child, my body is fine. There was no damage at all. I am perfectly healthy and I don't regret my decision at all. That doesn't mean I didn't struggle with it, but my life would have been a lot different and the thought that I could be sitting here with a teenager (when in actuality I have a preschooler that I was READY for and it is a huge challenge) just reminds me that I did make the right choice. I was not fit to be a parent at that age, I could not afford medical care, I could not have finished college pregnant, I would have been a single parent, the list goes on. That choice was a fork in the road and as long as your friend realizes and can accept that once she starts down that road she can't take it back, she has to accept her choice, she'll be fine. But again, it must be HER CHOICE alone. Do not try to sway her with stories of people who have two children super close in age, because everybody is different and some people can take two kids and turn it into sunshine and lollipops, and some people just break emotionally and physically. Only your friend knows what she can handle.

And if anyone out there is tempted to send me a message about how God put that baby in my belly for me to love, save yourself the trouble. I made my decision years ago and I am okay with it, if I could go back in time and tell my 18 year old self what to do as she sat bawling and COMPLETELY ALONE over that stupid pregnancy test, I'd tell her to do the exact same thing.

No, there is no evidence that terminating a pregnancy causes difficulty with conception later. It's too bad that our society has chosen to vilify a valid medical procedure; if your friend isn't ready for another child, she doesn't have to continue with the pregnancy, and she shouldn't feel badly making the choice to value her existing family over a fetus that's the size of a grain of rice. It's her choice, and you're a good friend for trying to support her through this decision.

I had an abortion and then three months later, was pregnant again! So, at least in my case, it didn't cause any problems with getting pregnant.

It sounds like she feels like abortion would be the best option, but it doesn't sound like she's committed to having an abortion. I had no problems, physical or emotional, after my abortion because I was 100% positive I did not want another child. Unless she is completely, 100% committed to having the abortion, maybe she should not do it and when the time comes, consider adoption.

Some women have a hard time with abortion; some don't.

And both you and your friend need to get some birth control. Neither one of you are in a position to continue to have children. It is irresponsible of both of you to continue to engage in sexual activity without birth control considering your current circumstances.

First, your friend really needs to see a doctor to determine how far along she is. We can all speculate, but none of us can really know. It's all anecdotal evidence at best. The pregnancy test changing color quickly doesn't really indicate that there is more of the pregnancy hormone or less-- it may be more about the efficacy of the test itself.

Second, I know several women who have had abortions and have had no trouble getting pregnant later on in life. None. I also know plenty of people who have never had abortions (myself included) who experienced fertility issues and miscarriage. Suffice it to say, there is no guarantee of anything. And still, this is largely anecdotal, right?

ETA: to those who say that finances aren't a valid reason to have only one, I'd have to strongly disagree with you. We chose to have one child only largely for that reason. We didn't want to go bankrupt keeping up with what two children would mean for our family and our situation, both in the short and long term. I'm not saying it is the sole reason your friend should choose to abort or keep her baby, but what I am saying is that there are many of us who chose to be financially responsible and make our decisions accordingly. My sister chose to give up her second child for adoption for this reason, too. Just another opinion, no judgments.

No, doesn't matter how quickly the indicator turns to a +, there is no way knowing how far along she is. Some women, even early in pregnancy just have more hCG hormone present. She would have to have an ultrasound to determine how far along she is if she doesn't know her last period or date of conception.
Secondly, I had my second kid at 25...it is definitely NOT too young to start a family. My kids are 18 months apart and I would say the biggest expense is childcare...but if she's not working than this should be a non-issue. I absolutley cannot imagine my life without either of them and truly believe everything happens for a reason and that each child is a blessing. While in theory I support a woman's choice, I just can't imagine ever actually doing that except for extreme circumstances, and I don't believe finances fall into that category.
As for you...there is really only one way to become pregnant which you should know by now. If you are being a responsible adult, then you will not end up in your friends shoes, no matter how many similarities there are. And NO, nursing does not count as a birth control method.
Sorry if this comes off as bitchy, but your friend is not a victim. By having sex, everyone (especially those with kids already) should know this can happen. We all have tough things to deal with in our lives. Having a baby is a BLESSING...not something that needs sympathy. There as SO many families that want children but are unable to have them on their own...your friend is just throwing hers away. That's like winning the lottery and then tearing up the ticket.

Having an abortion will not affect her future fertility. The evidence (not a few Mamapedia readers' opinions) shows that the vast majority of women do not regret having an abortion. The emotion most experience is actually relief. And yes - many many people regret not having an abortion - even though they love the child when born it still may dramatically change their lives and the life of the child they already have. I think she should only bring a child into this world if the child is truly wanted.

Now - it is easier to get pregnant at 25 than at 30 or 35. So if she chooses to delay for a long time, it may become more difficult. However that has zero to do with having an abortion.

I've never had an abortion but know people who have. She shouldn't have a problem getting pregnant after an abortion. Also my friends sister-in-law has 3 kids all 10 months apart. The first one was born in July, the second the next May and the third the next March and she did fine and the kids are fine. Whether she gets an abortion or not as a friend I would talk to her about birth control so that she won't have to make this decision again. Good luck to your friend.

This is waht I know - the people I know who could not afford the pregnancy, had a baby that was only ___ months old and had a husband or boyfriend who freaked out and insisted they could never affored that baby - they have all found that that little baby has been their biggest blessing in life. My Aunt who had 4 kids, was horribly ill and told her kidney's could not handle another pregnancy had her 5th child. She's no in her 80s and her youngest child, my cousin is a surgeon. He's the sweetest guy in the world. My aunt survived as did her kidneys. My friend had 2 little kids a house under construction, no money to finish it since her husband was thisclose to being unemployed (he was a pilot, this was just after 9/11 when no one was flying anywhere). Her husband insisted she get an abortion and she couldn't do it. Her y oungest looks like a clone of her husband and he is their shining light. He's such a blessing to them both.

I know, for certain, that God honors those who do the right thing - expecially when it's really hard. My mom was born in the depression. Her family had very little. They ended up raising chicken in order to have food on the table! I don't think we're at that point yet!

Encourage your friend to follow her heart. I know the emotional scars can be tougher than the physical ones - and I speak from experience.

How quickly the pregnancy test turns positive does not indicate length of pregnancy. At all. The first positive pregnancy test I had lit up like a Christmas tree within seconds of peeing and I was 5 weeks pregnant at the time.

I'm going to jump on the you both need reliable birth control bandwagon. If you are not prepared for another child, please take extra precautions to prevent having one.

Assuming she has the procedure and it all goes smoothly, yes, she can have another baby in the future. There could be a complication that might cause her to become sterile but that is rare. She should be asking her doctor about the risks, etc. She should also go to Planned Parenthood - they are wonderful.

They can also provide her with some solid birth control. Sounds like you might want to check it out with her. If you don't want to get pregnant again, I suggest that you do something to avoid that situation PRONTO!! Good luck!

I know women who've had abortions and went on to have perfectly normal and healthy children. However, because of the love they have for their kids, they have a difficult time forgiving themselves or wondering what could have been.

I know a caucasian woman who was raped by someone of a different race and got pregnant. If she'd opted for an abortion, who could have blamed her? But, she didn't. Instead of being a reminder of something traumatic, that child was the light of her life and he was embraced by everyone.

I am pro-choice. I don't walk in anyone else's shoes. However, abortion is not a form of birth control. If a woman knows that she's in no position to have another kid and can't support it emotionally, financially, the man is just some dude she layed down with for 30 minutes of fun....she shouldn't be having sex if she's not on birth control. You don't rely on pills OR condoms, you double up. You get mirena. You triple up. Pregnancy isn't a joke.

When my daughter was a sophomore in high school, one of her friends got pregnant. My daughter was devastated that she wanted an abortion. She said that we would take the baby and she could see it any time she wanted.
Her friend told her that she HAD to have an abortion because there was no way she could ever give her baby to someone else. She was a very young girl, it was her choice, I don't hold it against her, but it messed her up emotionally. On the upside, my daughter didn't want anything to do with boys or sex because of it. It really impacted her.

How quickly a pregnancy test turns positive is not an indicator of how far along the pregnancy is. Her being pregnant is not an indicator of whether or not you are pregnant or how far along.

I just really urge women to take charge of their bodies, take charge of protection if they aren't in a position to have another baby. An abortion is a medical procedure that thankfully is done safely these days. But, there are also a million ways to avoid an unwanted pregnancy and not have to deal with that option.

Just my opinion and no offense to anyone.

Women will almost always regret having an abortion but will never regret not having one.

I suggest that your friend go to Planned Parenthood. She needs to know how far along she is before she will even know if abortion is an option. If she decides to keep the pregnancy, Planned Parenthood will help her with the resources she needs to do so. And if she decides to adopt they will help her with that too.

Because you say you're concerned about also being pregnant, I wonder how careful you are being with birth control. Take this opportunity to be sure that you're using effective birth control.

Most of the women I know regret having an abortion...whether right or wrong...the what ifs...Abortion is painfail and lives with you forever. The post that says most women are relieved??? really? not the ones I know that 20 plus years later they still feel pain over their decision. If your friend doesn't want an abortion then she shouldn't have one period! I have to say if you don't want to get pregnant then you have to take responsibility and precautions so you don't. I take them and so far I've not had an unwanted or surprise pregnancy.

The world is full of "Irish Twins."
She's not nearly the first to have an "unscheduled" pregnancy.
She's not the first woman to bring a baby into a less-than-ready financial situation.
I think she needs to calm down and think logically!
This is definitely not the tone for rash or overly emotional decisions.
It won't cause it to be harder to conceive in the future.
Thank God (even though I wouldn't choose O.) abortion is available to those that really need it,
She needs to decide if she needs it.
If she goes choose an abortion or the morning after pill, I sure hope she puts a reliable birth control plan into place!
Good luck!

an abortion should not affect her fertility, but she really should go over all this with her doctor (but make sure she goes to PP or somewhere because some pro life doctors will lie, saying all kinds of things, even that an abortion can lead to cancer which is a bold face lie). But, if she wants to have it there are resources that can help, like WIC, to make things more affordable. In the end she has to do what is right in her heart.

My ex got me pregnant (on purpose, he actually sabotaged the condom) when my older son was 9 months old. My boys are just 18 months apart in age.

I wasn't married, was in no financial position to afford another baby, and really didn't want to have another child. I just didn't think I could.

But I also couldn't have an abortion. I'm pro-choice...but my choice is NO. I knew I would regret having an abortion and I knew that I would have to answer to God for it. I just couldn't.

And I'm so glad I didn't.

My boys are SO very close. They love one another and are best friends, even at ages 10 and 11. I really couldn't imagine it being any other way.

Yes, it's hard at first. Having a baby and a toddler is hard work! And costly. I was on WIC for 6 years, which really helped. It's hard, but it certainly can be done. I don't regret it one bit.

I pray for your friend. I pray that she chooses what is truly right for her...RIGHT isn't always easy.

What a difficult position for her to be in! She will be able to get pregnant again with no problems. This is, if she goes to a reputable clinic/doctor. One of my old friends was in a situation much like your friend. She was separated from her husband, going through a rough time and "hooked up" with a guy she met, got pregnant and got an abortion. She and her hubby got back together and about a year later, she got pregnant again with no problems whatsoever. Abortions are much safer now and with very little recovery time needed.

Best wishes for your friend!

I so don't have the answer for you but wanted to let you know my heart goes out to your friend, and you for being there to support her. Good luck and hugs to both of you.

I don't think the physical problems are a worry anymore, but the emotional ones are. The guilt and shame I've seen from women who did similar things is really hard to see.

My brother is 16 months older than me, and I have twin sisters 14 months younger, so we are all super close in age. And we are super close, I can't imagine any of them not being born. Sibs that age can be really close.

I feel badly for your friend, and you are sweet to support her. I agree that being broke is not a valid reason for an abortion. I hope she chooses adoption or to keep the baby.

I only know a few women who have had abortions - all when the fetuses were at 6-8 weeks. They all easily had babies when they were older. None had emotional trauma or regrets, although one got mastitis and anemia after it and had to take an iron supplement and antibiotics. She had no trouble nursing her babies.

But that is only from what I know of the women I've been close to in my life. And, I am not a doctor.

Why are either of you having unprotected sex when you are not ready for another child? I would think both mom and dad would want to be using something at this point. Please talk with your friend about the adoption option. The only scars I know of from a couple friends that had an abortion were emotional. One became very reckless and died in a motorcycle accident a couple years after and the other became a drinker.

It's not the physical obstacles, but the mental ones. I have a couple of friends that were young and stupid, had "flavour of the week" syndrome, and ended up doing such. Later, when they grew up, the overwhelming guilt of what they had done tore them apart, and they both ended up in counseling. One never ended up having children, and is a wreck.

The other one lost her husband at the time over that, and met, married, adopted, and very long later, finally got over her grief, and had one of her own. With the second friend, what saved her was her second husband. As soon as she told him, he dragged her as fast as possible to grief counseling(her second round, but much more supportive this time). He was there every step of the way, didn't judge, let her cry it out on his shoulder. She's older and in her eyes, wiser. She says if she had a do-over, she'd have carried it full term and put it up for adoption.

For the record, I believe there's only a few reasons for having one, and poor finances are not a good enough reason.

{EDIT: Nope. It all depends on the amount of HGH that your body produces. Some women go full term and not have it show up on the test, and other's can barely wet the stick and it's +. This information came to me from my friends Mother back in the day(She was a Direct-Entry Midwife, and oversaw 1,000's of births), when I had cried that the stick never changed until I was about 2 months or more along. I asked my family doctor, who agreed with that.}

Agree or disagree, as always it's...

Just my 2cp.

Sounds like she is using abortion as birth control. That is so sad.

Someone very close to me had an abortion years ago, and really she has never gotten over it mentally. Maybe it doesn't leave physical scars, but it is a lifelong thing to know that you stopped a beating heart for no reason other than irresponsibility. For her it is anyway.

Think adoption, and think birth control in the future, or this will happen again and again. Pregnancy truly IS preventable.

Having an abortion does not make it harder to conceive in the future. That is a myth. If someone had 10 or 20 abortions, maybe, but not with one.

If she's truly not comfortable with abortion, though, I would second the recommendation of adoption. You might try helping her connect with a really good adoption agency, perhaps one that facilitates open adoptions.

I'm pro-choice, for whatever it's worth, but I'm also VERY pro-adoption.

After delivering a baby is one of the most fertile times for a woman, so if she has a test that's reading positive then I sincerely doubt it's a false positive from hormones from her last pregnancy. It's partly why you're supposed to wait six weeks after you deliver before having sex... but it's also why it's highly recommended to use a back-up method of birth control during that first year after the baby is born especially when breastfeeding.

Anyway, yes, your friend is likely pregnant.

If you believe she doesn't want to terminate the pregnancy then she shouldn't regardless of anything else. She shouldn't be pressured into an abortion by anyone, not even her boyfriend. Her situation doesn't have to automatically mean that she "should" have an abortion. If she doesn't want one and wants the baby, then an abortion should be taken off the table as an option. Period.

As for questions about how abortions will affect her future fertility, those are only questions she should be asking her OB based on her specific situation and medical history. In theory, her fertility won't be affected but that doesn't mean she'll always remain fertile and have an easy time getting pregnant. Other circumstances could occur in her late 20's, in her 30's or 40's, affecting her ability to get pregnant and have more children.

My girls are 12 months apart. Their birthdays are within a week of each other. It's a lot of work, finances are tight, and we were not ready AT ALL. But there's no way I'd ever have an abortion. And it's actually turned out alright. I breastfed both of them and use cloth diapers. The older one is now 2 and potty trained. They share toys and clothes. And now we're done having kids so I have my tubes tied.

Your friend needs to know that it can be done if she wants it to work.

And I'm sure she'll have no issues with getting pregnant later on if she does terminate the pregnancy.

Nothing to LOL about in either of your situations.

Your friend seems more concerned about what will happen if she decides "down the road", to get pregnant again.

You are both dependent on your parents to give you shelter and are unemployed.

Your friend will have to make the choice to carry her baby to term, keep the child, give it up for adoption to a loving home, or abort. This is a very personal and profound decision that only she should make after weighing all the possibilities.

Sounds like you have some difficult decisions to make as well.

Some women have difficulty conceiving after an abortion, some don't. If she knows that it is best for her, her boyfriend, and their daughter not to have another baby right now, the "what if" of another pregnancy that hasn't even happened really ought not to be a factor in that decision. If she wants more klids later and can't have them, there is no shortage of already-born children waiting to be adopted.

ETA: I don't know anything about the speed at which the + sign comes up being an indicator of how far along you are.

ETA: As for the statement that most women who abort feel regret, not relief, I guess I 'm not most women. I had an abortion when my daughter was four. It was the best decision for everyone involved, and I have no regrets whatsoever. Faced with the same circumstances, I would make the same decision.

I had my first when I was 18 yrs old. My second one was born 14 mos later. Fast forward 17 years.... have four daughters and married to the same man :) It can work. It is very hard when you are young. Especially with babies that close in age. I chose to fight for my babies and and my marriage. Both were and are still worth it ;)

Mom, does it really matter how many weeks she is right now if she's going to get an abortion? She's not that far along to be TOO far along, right?

Long ago when women got abortions in back alleys, it was much worse. Nowadays abortions are a lot more safe and fewer women are ruined by them.

I don't think that she should make this decision based solely on the fear of the future.

Please don't put her situation in your head, mom. Be careful with your form of birth control so that you don't have to face this decision. Some people use two forms of birth control - that might be what you could consider.

Good luck to your friend.

Dawn

Has she considered adoption?

There's lots of evidence that abortion has many detrimental side effects. A simple web search or even a search of medical literature (www.pubmed.com) will show you that.

Here's one site with a lot of stats:
http://www.prochoice.com/abortion_safe04.html

and a news story:
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2011/01/22/women-claim-abortion...

My cousin had multiple abortions and now can't conceieve.
I would go to an expert doctor if she does it, not some free clinic.

I truly hate to see anyone go through an abortion. It is something they will live with every day of the rest of their lives. They will see a child and think, my little one could be right about that age if I had kept him, or similar thoughts. It is not as easy as some would think.

I know a young woman who has had at least 1 and I feel strongly she has had 2 for sure. I know it plays on her mind every day and she regrets not letting those pregnancy's continue. She has even said that if she had let them be adopted they would at least be with a family and loved.

If her mind is made up and she is going to do this then there is nothing that can be done. She should have your support as much as you are comfortable giving. If you do not support his idea then just let her know you love her but don't want to be around an abortion. She must accept that. If you are okay with the whole thing then you need to be there for her to give her the best hugs you can.

For two of my pregnancies, I took the test 3 days before my period and the line popped up even before I was done peeing. So I was about 3 weeks along with both pregnancies.

I know abortion is a personal choice. I am pro choice. But I know so many great women and couples who are spending tons of money and time and tears to try to have a baby. Myself included. Please please please if you or someone you know wants an abortion I know at least a handful of professional very wonderful people who would love to give any baby of any race or gender a loving home. :) it just seems to me that if you're going to throw a fetus away, you mind as well give it away to someone who would adore it :) (Sorry if this is too one sided.)

I have several friends/family that had children very close together. 11 months apart. They were young, late teens and early 20's. Although I don't think 25 is too young to have a family. They needed help, it is tough, but people make it work. Parents can work opposite shifts and rely on some friends/family to avoid child care costs. Breastfeeding to reduce formula costs. Getting things second hand. Finances can be dealt with, assistances are available, and family may help. Just make sure you are working hard to do your best, and maybe others can help fill in the gaps.
There are more things to consider when deciding on an abortion other than "abortion affecting future pregnancy vs. financial instability." Which may be the case but you obviously can't go into tremendous detail in your post. But she really needs to decide if she wants the baby or not, regardless of her situation, because I know people can make it work.

I was TTC, so I tested the day I missed my period. It was positive immediately, while I was peeing on the test.

Nothing worth having comes easy. What seems like an easy quick fix can have life long consequences of regret. I know many families that have had two close together unplanned and yes it is difficult at first but if you ask them a few years later when their family is established they would not have it any other way. I believe that God makes no mistakes and you could be on birth control or anything and still get pregnant because that little soul has a purpose in this life that only God knows and we cannot judge the value of a life lost. I know it would be hard for you to tell your friend this because you don't want to appear judgemental but just love her and be there for her as much as you can and tell her you'll be there to help her and it will all work out. I wish you the best. To me personally it is not worth a lifetime of what ifs just to have the convenience now. Life doesn't have a quick fix, everything has consequences and trickle down effects and every life is worth living poor or not. Please have her contact a pregnancy care center in her area they will provide her with a free screening of her baby and all kinds of services to help her along even housing if she needs it.
BTW the woman that said she was 100% sure she wanted an abortion but yet states she was able to get pregnant three months later? What did three months make a difference in having a baby idk.

Best of luck with whatever is decided.

"but she says she is worried though that once she has an abortion, if she decides a couple years from now that they want to have another baby it will be difficult for her to get pregnant... is that true??”
http://www.nrlc.org/abortion/ASMF/asmf13.html

Abortion risks: a list of physical complications related to abortion
http://afterabortion.org/1999/abortion-risks-a-list-of-ma...

The 2nd link numerates the risks below. I've added more links on the ones I could find recent news about. You can find the information on line or your local library. It requires your time to do it.

Do a google search on “pro-life” and “abortion risks” and that should give you the links you are looking for. The pro-choice links will always downplay this stuff.

Death
http://www.suntimes.com/news/metro/14774459-418/lawsuit-f...
http://www.lifenews.com/2012/07/26/planned-parenthood-may...

Cervical, Ovarian, and liver cancer

Uterine perforation
http://clinicquotes.com/abortionist-on-the-danger-of-uter...

Cerival lacerations

Placenta previa
subsequent pre-term deliveries and other complications of labor
http://www.lifenews.com/2012/06/01/127-studies-show-abort...
http://www.lifenews.com/2009/06/29/int-1246/

Handicapped newborns (references are in that link)

Ectopic pregnancy

Pelvic inflammatory disease

Immediate complications – a lot of bleeding afterwards
http://clinicquotes.com/woman-beyond-he-breaking-point-af...

Increased risks for women seeking multiple abortions

Lower general heath

Increased risk for contributing health risk factors

Psychological problems
http://www.lifenews.com/2005/12/12/nat-1895/

If I were your friend (age 25, 1 child, 1 boyfriend, living at home, not engaged and broke), I would not have an abortion. First, I'd be terminating my baby's life (a no-no for me). I would not do it in a million years. Secondly, (and the 2nd biggie for me) there are risks to any medical procedure.

I am near-sighted. I know I can have a Lasik surgery to “correct” this. And I am sure hundreds to thousands of people have done it and are “fine.” But I won't risk it. I'd rather live with contacts and glasses than risk blurry vision or a bigger problem down the road. (Do a google search for “Lasik complications” and boy I'm glad I never did this.)

IMO, same thing with abortion. It's not as safe as people are telling themselves here. I follow a FB page called Life News. They list all the news stories regarding abortion that you won't hear about on your local news. That's how I know this is not as safe as people are led to believe.

Finally, I have 2 kids, 4 years apart. It was still hard. Parenting is hard. At least your friend has her mom to help her. And * hopefully * the boyfriend will step up. If he doesn't, she needs to re-evaluate that situation. Some people have 3 kids under the age of 5 (2 parents) and make it work. My sister and I are 1 year and 10 months apart. I love her so much and I'm so happy to have her.

And like the previous poster wrote, God has a plan for every life.

Not judging but asking -- why are you and your friends not absolutely sure you are using a reliable method of birth control?

Is abortion the best "option" for the developing baby? I don't think so. While it might be inconvenient for another 8 months, I hope your friend will choose life ( and hopefully the "adoption option" ). And I hope she gets the counseling she needs. Good luck to you both and your children.