Feeling Guilty - Cuba,MO

He got to go to a ballgame and you feel guilty for letting HIM take care of the baby for a while? Men are like kids sometimes. They test you to see what they can get away with. Don't let him fool you. He's fully capable of putting the baby down for a night.

AMEN Bethany C!!! the only thing is that he might not do it like you do. If you can let go of things needing to be done your way, it will help you in the long run.

One of my favorite sayings is, "If Mama ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy!"

Hubs has had his fun, you deserve a treat too. Enjoy that sundae sista! Would you like sprinkles with that?

WHY are you feeling guilty at all? He went out for the evening and you were watching the baby for 16 hours.

.

Do not feel guilty!! He went to a game tonight...that was his fun. You have been taking care of the baby all day. YOU need a break. He should put the baby to sleep without complaint.

How weird, I have had exactly the same day, except my husband is not home yet and the baby is already down for the night. But if he weren't already sleeping and my husband was home, I would have no problems handing him off. You shouldn't feel guilty. If your hubby is anything like mine, he probably feels less able to get the baby to sleep, and since you "know how" and you "are better at it" then he wants you to do it. Go ahead, eat your dessert at your leisure, and then go make sure hubby got the baby to sleep. That's what I would do. Hubby's had a long day, but so have you, and being the one at home all day with the baby is tough, especially when Daddy gets to go out and have fun after work.

You feel guilty because you're the mommy and that's what we do, but you needed to say no! Yes, he did work all day, but so did you and a longer day at that! He got to go to the game for some "me" time so it was not unreasonable for him to put the baby down for the night while you took a few moments to enjoy a much-needed chocolate break. :o)

Don't feel guilty... I think as women we feel like we have to be able to do it all, so good for you for asking for what you need. If he's away from the baby all day, it is good for the baby and for Dad to spend a little quality time with each other. So put your feet up, take some deep breaths and enjoy your sundae:)

He got to go to a game with the guys. His day was not that long. Your child is 50% his DNA also, so allow him to be the dad and put your child to sleep. And enjoy your brownie sundae!

don't feel guilty. think of it as your hubby hasn't seen his baby all day and needs to spend a moment with him. your baby probably missed his daddy anyways. and in the meantime, you get to regain your sanity =)

Mmmm... chocolate. Don't feel guilty, you are just teaching Daddy how to do it himself. One day you will have the flu or something, and Dad's all need to be able to comfort, feed, bathe, and put the kids to bed or get them ready for school, etc. When we had the child over to dad on occasion you are doing him and you and your child a favor. Just makes the family unit a little bit tighter.

This might be just a different perspective. I am a single parent and I have been basically since my daughter was born, but officially since she was six months old.
I loved that every night after work I got to spend time with her. I got to bathe her and feed her and rock her to sleep. There were certainly nights where I was tiered/stressed or it would have been so nice to get the break, but I am so greatful I didn't have that because I absolutely would have taken it here or there, but instead I bonded every night with my baby. It may have been an obligation sometimes but because I knew it wasn't an option to not care for my baby, I got that thought out of my head. And honestly it was really relaxing to have a wind down period with my daughter and to get out of the work mode and into the fun mommy mode.
So don't feel guilty you are giving your husband this gift and let him enjoy his time and dont' ever turn it into a work or obligation time but a calm relaxing ritual.

I think you feel guilty because SAHMs often think we need to do it all - that this is our job (unlike his job, which takes him out of the house, but gives him lunch breaks, an end time, and weekends). My husband works 50-60 hours a week, and I know it can be hard when he comes home tired to say, "Babe, I just can't keep going at this pace, either." However, since your husband got to go to the game and blow off some of his stress, it really isn't appropriate for him to ask you to keep working when he gets home. I'm glad you stood up for yourself! It is a balancing act with SAHMs these days, because our husbands need to realize that we work hard during the day, but we can't forget that they're tired at the end of the day, too. But everyone deserves some down time, and if one person has had it and one hasn't, well, that makes the decision easy!

It's hard to ask for help when it feels to you like you're whining. Really, though, parenting should be a shared thing. Doesn't mean it has to be exactly 50 - 50, if that doesn't work for you, but don't deprive your husband of that feeling of competence with his child that you only get from experience. If you, like most of us, are better at putting the child to bed or soothing or feeding or whatever, it's only because you've done it more. Give him the opportunity to improve.

When my kids were younger, my husband & I fell into that pattern where I did most of the parenting. Now, years later, my husband envies the closer relationship I have with our kids AND he feels guilty about how he treated me & the children when they were younger. Think of it this way: that brownie is helping your wonderful husband to feel better as a Dad (he just may not realize it yet).

Good for you for loving your husband enough to respect the effort he already puts in to his working day. Now, love him, your child and yourself enough to take a balanced look at things & parent TOGETHER.

Coffee ice cream on brownies is the best. Enjoy -- & then bring him one once the baby's down.