I really need help, i have no idea where to start. How can i begin the process of getting a divorce even though i have three kids? I cannot afford a really expensive dvorce right now but i need to get out and live my own life away from all the hurt and the drama of my husband. He was only abusive phycologically, verbally and mentally and i dont think that he would hit me but i am not living with him now. I do have a job to where i can support myself and my children but child support is something that i would like to apply for. I would not let him be alone with my kids though so full custody is on my mind. He has a severe temper problem that i would not trust him enough to be alone with my kids. I do think that he will leave us alone on his own but i also am scared about him stalking me becasue he has stated that if i move on he will hunt them down. Im just wanting to get away clean and safe with all of my kids.
Since you do have children, it is best that you obtain a lawyer to work out custody, visitation, and child support.
Divorce or not, if you are no longer living together, you CAN and SHOULD file for support and custody. Google family court in your county. Good Luck!
:)
He's already threatened you so contact the domestic violence hotline to learn how to keep yourself and your children safe during this process. A womens shelter is also a good resource. You may need a restraining order if you are afraid he will stalk you. Find a lawyer who can help you apply for child support and full custody. And start documenting anything your husband does that makes you feel that it's unsafe to leave your kids alone with him.
Hope's Door, in Plano offers free counseling for abused families. They also could refer you to some legal advice.
Hope's Door
820 F Avenue # 100
Plano, TX 75074
###-###-####
www.hopesdoorinc.org
Please call Leslie Martin @ Martin family law and @ least have her file a restraining order. She saved our lives and got me child support plus half my mortgage and took small monthly payments. If you have any of these frightening words from this man on voicemail or emails that you can save take them to her!
obtain a lawyer if it is someone you think may cause problems. If you partner is accepting of this you guys can go forward without one. You can I believe file through the court house the same way you do to get married. I am not expert on it. So I may be wrong. If anything you can call your county clerk. They will be able to tell you where to start.
First, I am so sorry you are going thru this - been there only mine was physically abusive as well. It is very hard to get supervised visitation - how old are your kids? You must plan as if you do not file immediately after leaving if he finds the kids he can take them and there is nothing legally you can do if he is their father. So, get help - I went to New Beginnings in Garland - great place. Take all the money you can get your hands on - I did not and that was a bad choice on my part. If you truly fear him you must be prepared to stay away from everywhere he can find you/kids - job, school, church, friends...document everything as you have to be able to prove it in court - it is not enough that it is your opinion...does he drink? us drugs? - you, yourself must be squeaky clean on all of this....so, you need to find a safe place to stay, have money, file immediately for divorce and temporary custody and support......I will add that unless you can prove physical danger for the kids, it will be very difficult to get supervised visitation but that should not stop you from trying and a lot depends on the ages of the children..
You kids deserve support from both of you, so don't even think about not applying for suppport! Since your husband had a temper problem and he has actually stated he would hunt you and the kids down, talk to a woman's shelter for advice. They have great resouces for going to court and finding legal representation and can even help to get a protective order in case he blows a gasket when you file. I would pursue full custody with supervised visitations and request a guardian representation for your children during the divorce. If you are scared of him stalking and he has made the threat to hunt you down, you need to go into this smartly and prepared and with all the help you can get. Do not underestimate what your husband can or will do!
I know it seems like you can't afford a lawyer but you can't afford to NOT have a lawyer. You've gotten some great suggestions, please use the law to your advantage. God bless and good luck!!!
You need a lawyer..... You need protection from your husband and so do ur kids! Google Diana Porter
Is there a law school by you?, you can always try to get a student to help you with paperwork, they do it for free or very little charge, so they can get experience. But, 1st off I would try and get him to leave, if he refuses pack up the kids and go! I would also get a restraining order against him, sounds like he means business, don't let him scare you!, if so he is getting his way! if he scares you think of how much he is scaring the kids!, hopefully you have family around that will help you, if not maybe you could stay with a friend, so that you have at least some type of protection, if you go to a shelter, they wont let you leave, until things are settled. Don't live your life in that situation! get the ball rolling! don't know if that helps much, but good luck!
I see that you are from Carrollton, Texas so you need to contact LegalAid of North Texas and depending on your income, you potentially will be provided a free attorney. Also, consider contacting Genesis Women's Shelter or The Family Place. Both of these are for abused women, physically or emotionally, they may have resources for you as well. Just a few options. Good luck.
Is your husband abusive? Will he leave on his own? What is your financial situation? If you fear for our safety and that of your children and have no place to go, you can go to a women's shelter. If you could provide a little more information, we could give you better suggestions. We are here for you, talk to us.
Blessings.....
I really do not have any advice on this but I saw your posting and wanted to tell you that I am sorry you are going through this. I grew up in an abusive home and the emotional wounds are awful. Be safe and know that another mom is thinking of you and praying for you.
