T.S.
I would never say to a mother "your child is acting up because you are working." However, you have a pretty unique situation which probably is hard on a three year old. I think it's not so much that you're not there as often, but rather that her schedule seems pretty inconsistent, different places and caregivers on different days, not to mention that being at daddy's workplace all day is probably pretty confining and dull for her.
Is there any possibility of sending her to daycare or preschool every day, or at least part or half time? That way she could get a chance to be around other kids and have fun, while you sleep and daddy works.
Cranky kids are usually bored kids, and that has nothing to do with whether mommy works or not.