Custody Question - Dallas,TX

He can fight for custody (but he needs to be the one to file everything not you, even if you are married). I don't really think that even as a stepparent you have much rights past the rights of the non-custodial parent, and the non-custodial parent still has to do everything. You need to document everything that she is violating (i.e. not letting him see his kid, violating by moving, etc.). But he needs to prove that she's a unfit mother. Get a lawyer, because you guys will need it. Men fighting for full custody is hard.

Even if you are married, unless bio mom gives up her rights and you adopt, you have no rights to the child.

My question, if the situation is as bad as you make it out to be, why is he waiting to get married? Why is he not already fighting to get his son? Why is he not filing contempt charges every time he doesn't get his son on his court ordered days? Why is he not continuing to call CPS every single time she's using? He doesn't need to be married to do what's right for his child NOW.

If she isn't following the court order he needs to file contempt against her if he doesn't it will look like he doesn't really care if he sees his son or not.

Hi Nino,

The other mamas have given great advice. Your marital status won't matter in a custody fight. It's not about who would be a better "mom".

But I have a question - you say that the biomom "keeps him away from us even though he is supposed to get everyother weekend, once during the week, and every other holiday".

Do you have a formal custody agreement in place - filed with the state?

If your bf is supposed to get his son, THEN HE GOES TO THE HOUSE AND GETS HIS SON. If the biomom doesn't hand over the kid he calls the police and a lawyer, shows them the custody agreement, and she is in contempt of court.

HE WILL NEVER GET CUSTODY IF HE IS NOT EVEN TAKING HIS SON THE MINIMUM AMOUNT OF TIME THAT HE CURRENTLY HAS AVAILABLE. The ex will go infront of the judge and lie and say that the biodad doesn't take him for visits.

So that is were he MUST start. If you DON'T have a custody agreement filed in court then he MUST do this TODAY. It is the only legal protection he has to see his son.

As far as moving - most states say that you can move no more than 45-60 miles from the current address without letting the other parent know 60 days before the move. When she lets you know, he contests and then SHE CAN'T MOVE WITH THE BOY.

Good Luck.

Your marital status really doesn't have much to do with this. He should be fighting for custody now. The only difference in being married is the court may look at the situation as your boyfriend has a more stable household.

Even if you are married, you have no rights as far as the child is concerned, unless you adopt the child.

The other moms have given you a lot of good advice. The bottom line is if your soon to be husband cares about his baby he needs to act now. If he is truly the best parent and based on the information you provide, with a good attorney, he will be able to eventually get custody. It may take some time, but the sooner he acts the better chances he is going to have. Rationalizing that she cleans up or she neglects him to spend time with her other child, etc. it's not going to help. If he lets her prevent him from exercising his visitation he is telling the courts he doesn't care enough about his child and that the mom is not that bad. In Texas, the Orders usually stripulate geographical restrictions such as the child cannot not be moved out of county. The sooner your boyfriend acts, the better chances he will have at achieving his goals. John Haugen at The Haugen Law Firm is a great attorney. Have your boyfriend schedule in a consult. Their website is www. haugenlawfirm.com, phone# ###-###-####, Best wishes and God bless!!!

laborlawtalk.com, they should be able to help. i know in oklahoma you CAN NOT give up your rights unless there is another person to take over responsibility for the child. must be married at least one year to start the aoption process otherwise at 6 months you can file and it will costs an extra $500. and i know here there is no way to get parental rights unless the mother is willing to give her rights up or has lost custody of another child, abandonment is also another way, must be out of childs lfe for 6months then u file abandonment then after another six months she could be served with papers, charging her with child abandonment or something i really dont remember. my sons bio dad wants to give my DH rights and were still having so many problems and road blocks and were going to have to pay for his lawyer and his couseling so that my dh can adopt my son. but every state is different, call a local lawyer and see if they can give u some advice.

If/when you marry this child's father, you will be his step-mother. You still will not have any legal rights except that for insurance and tax purposes he will also be your dependent (you can add him to you insurance etc).

His father can file for full custody at any time. If he has a set (court ordered) visitation then he should follow it. He should have a copy of the order with him when he shows up (not in hand but available in his car if necessary). If he shows up to pick up his son and she isn't home, he should call her and find out how soon she will be there or bring the son to him. If she is home but doesn't let the son go w/ dad, he should demand that she comply. If these things still result and her not allowing the son to go he should contact the police, they will look at the court order and enforce it.

Why on earth would you want to use her doing what is right by her daughter against her in court? Why would doing what is right by her daughter be a bad thing in court? Unless she is neglecting the son it is unlikely that the court would see anything other than her being a good mom. Would you want what you are doing in the best interest of one child to cost you another?

If your boyfriend is being denied his visitation then he needs to call his attorney and file contempt of court charges against her. It is his responsibility to file and to fight. If you interfere the judge could get pissed off and dislike your boyfriend because of it. Too many people talking and saying different stuff is just aggravating, They have heard it over and over and over every day.

One thing my daughter and her oldest sons dad did was show up for visitation and they had their court papers in their pocket. They would call the police every time the other didn't comply. It got to be where they just started going along and let the other pick up or deliver the baby when it was time. Another thing they finally did was swap the boy at the Police station. That way if there was ANY fighting or stupid stuff the police were right there.

They had it set up where they swapped him on Sunday night at 6pm, the other was allowed to visit him during the others week ANYTIME they wanted, stupid huh? The dad would show up at all hours and she had to let him in and visit the baby....but if she went to his house to visit he had her arrested for trespassing. It was a silly situation and is finally resolved due to the child g\being taken away by the state and he's now being adopted by my ex and his wife.