4 Year Old Girl Wants to Call Her Daddy

I tell my 4yr old daughter "daddys busy" or "he's working" because if you tell her the truth she will be upset with you for saying bad things about her daddy. Its sad that he doesn't call her and even sadder that he doesn't let you call her because he doesn't wanna be a good parent he wants to make you look bad in her eyes as well. Don't stress too much she is almost to the age where she will be able to see what is really going on and have her own opinion of him. Good luck

You could say that her daddy is a boy and boys don't always like to talk on the phone as much as we girls do. Other than that, I wouldn't try too hard to make excuses for him, as she will figure it out as she gets older. When you place the call to him, hand her the phone and let HER be the one to ask to talk to him or to leave the message (since he doesn't want to go through you). Girls do just naturally love their daddy's, even if the mom seems to be doing most of the work. She obviously misses her daddy alot, so I would let her call him, even if it sometimes seems excessive. If she looks sad or disappointed, just give her extra hugs (you are not in her shoes) and maybe she will talk to you about her feelings. You don't have to solve all the problems, just give her the loving support. Sometimes we moms like to control and fix everything, but you know that usually people don't want advice or opinions as much as they want emotional support.
Linda C.

I experience this same scenario all the time. Just remember your daughter will grow up and realize the truth on her own. Just let her call as much as she wants. It will be for him to answer eventually. Just like the other mother said, she will she his true colors.

Oh poor baby! I really can't imagine her thoughts on this subject because I remember my feeling of loss when my parents divorced and my dad was nowhere to be found. I was ten and knew what kind of a man he was. She is innocent and more than likely still thinks her dad is the best! All I suggest is to call her dad with her not around and see if you can reach him. This way, she does not know that he is not answering or calling back. Take her for an icecream or tell her to go pick her favorite movie and watch it with her. Hopefully, it will just take her mind off of it for a while.
It's really not cool that dad is behaving this way because just like my dad, he will regret it after 20 years and wish he could go back and do it right. I still love my dad, but the respect will most likely never come back. And this was not based on anything my mom ever said, I was able to form my own opinion on him as I got older. So, my other suggestion would be not to protect him, but to protect her. It's a shame, but it happens.

Good luck!

It's hard but for the first 8 years of my daughters life I told her he was working so he was to busy to talk. So she left messages with no return call ever. She is now 12 and he has shown her his true colors when he told her if he wanted to talk to her he would call. He has also tried to get her to go over there for summer time (30 days) and turned around and tried to send her home after 3 days on a 12 hour bus ride by herself with her baby brother. (she was 9 at the time).

Best way to handle this is to go ahead and do the calls. Talk to your ex and let him know that your daughter wants to talk to him and tell him that he needs to start calling on his own if he wants to be apart of your daughters life. Kids remember. My daughter no longer wants anything from my ex unless he comes down her with money to buy her what she wants. She tells me (this is not the way I raised her-this is what he tried to do to her) if he wants to buy my love for a few minutes fine but I dont love him anymore.

My daughter knows now that her dad never did have anything to do with her life and now she doesnt care about him what so ever.