When Is It a Good Time for Childcare

Anytime and per circumstances... a child needs to go to Daycare. It can't be helped. In an ideal world... you can send them to daycare when you want. But this is not your situation.

Your Mom, has thankfully, said her feelings. It has to be respected. I personally know a lot of the Grandparents at my daughter's school... and they complain about how they just can't take it anymore... and even just driving back and forth to the school tires them out immensely... BUT, that their Mom/Dad RELIES on them... BUT, they get NO vacation even when the schools & the kids have vacation. One Grandparent sarcastically joked that "even if the parents has a vacation themselves they STILL bring the kids to my house to baby-sit... I get NO break. And I have to cancel my own appointments and socials..." AND they also commonly complain that they get NO appreciation for their sacrifices....SURE they LOVE their Grandkids...but that does not make them the default baby-sitter for anything and everything. One Grandpa I know says he spends ALL his day taking his Grandkids to and from school (they are different ages), and have to talk to the Teachers for the Parents, check with the school about events and ask questions too... JUST like a Parent...but they are not the Parent.

Using a Grandparent to save money is common.... but, it has to be fair. If a Grandparent is expressing exhaustion and/or that she get days off-- you NEED to do that. What if she gets sick? Hurt? Ill? Does it feel good knowing that she can't even go to her own Doctor or Dental appointments... that she can't even go out with her friends for extended luncheons, that she can't even take a nap? THIS is what the Grandparents complain about, that I know.

One Grandma told me that not once, did her kids tell her 'thank you' for babysitting EVERY DAY INCLUDING WEEKENDS. PLUS, she takes the kids to all their weekend extracurricular lessons and games too. Meanwhile, the parents just have a 'break' all weekend. And, a lot of Grandparents have a hard time saying 'no' so they just go along with it or they feel bad for their Grandkids.

Not saying this is you... but I really identify with the elderly and Grandparents... after seeing what my Dad went through when he was sick and then died. I did not have children yet at that time... but I saw with my own eyes, what the elderly & my Dad's friends did.... babysitting STILL even if they themselves are old/tired/fatigued/or sick themselves. My Parent's friends, all Grandparents, go through this too...

Respect your Mom's wishes... she probably had to really think about it hard and it was probably very hard for her to even ask for a day off. It shouldn't be so. Grandparents and elderly can't be taken for granted... for our babysitting.

Sorry for coming off so strongly about this... but I have Grandparents that are friends of mine...and they tell me all of this. But they "can't" tell their grown kids about it... because it is such a touchy subject, or their kids will not understand.

All the best,
Susan

Soooooo time for daycare. For all the reasons listed by everyone else. Bite the bullet now, while your mum's still with you.

Something to try:

Instead of switching from full-time Nana, to full time daycare... talk with your mum and see if she'd be willing to do some half days for you. That way you can ease everyone into the new situation. Make sure you keep easing in that direction though!!! Transitions can be tough, or like a knife through butter, and as I'm sure you know... we never know which it's going to be! And TALK with your mum. Find out (if she's willing to keep watching them for awhile) if she'd rather have mornings, or afternoons, over every other day...what have you. See what works for HER schedule...and keep her in the loop with the daycares you're checking out. If she's picking up at 3pm and taking them back to her house, you don't want a daycare that's 40 minutes away from her. If she's going to be continuing on helping out, she's going to need input.

Best of luck

Send them to a good daycare! There's nothing wrong with that. Lots of people don't have the advantage of grandparents who live around, and send their kids to daycare or have a nanny.

If your mom is expressing the desire to take days off, etc., you don't want to force her to babysit. Taking care of little ones is tough enough for those of us who are parents - it's just that much more tiring for our parents' generation.

Maybe you can do daycare 2 or 3 days a week and have grandma babysit the other days.

Great suggestions!

My son goes to preschool right now for 2 days, and the afternoons he spends with my Mom. This gives her the morning to rest and run errands, and then spend quality time with Grandma. Just find a place that fits your kids and you.

Your soooooo lucky to have grandma. but if she needs a break you can always look in to part time child care. I am a stay at home working mom. doing child care out of my home i have been for 18 years now. If I could be of help to you let me know. I have resonable rates and I have part time and full time avalible,I am cpr certified and lic by the state. Hope this helps Have a good day T.

You were so lucky to have your parents there. Not many people do. A couple suggestions. Look into a preschool setting for your 3 year old. 3 days a week for a few hours. I am a home daycare provider and run a daycare/preschool. If you can work out with your parents your 3 year old can start preschool and if they can keep your little one part time that might be easier for them. Depending on where you live I have anopening for your 3 year old for my preschool program.

M.

Hi K., there's no magical age for Childcare, I'm a Childcare provider and I get baby's as young as 6 weeks, if you have to work then childcare usually is a must. I have had many people come to me who's mom or grandmother or other family member were watching their child and decided they didn't want to do it anymore, the thing about using a unlicenced relative, theres no contract, so there is nothing for them to honor, a licensed provider does this for a living so you know they are not going to just up and quit on you. For you if you need to use childcare, try and find one that offers sibling discounts, what are you paying your mom if I can ask? Daycare can be exspensive, but if you find one that is really good, it's worth it, J. L.