What Would You Do? Re: Your Siblings

She blocked you on Facebook because you didn't see her as much as she wanted?

Oh, dear-- is she very young? That sounds incredibly immature.

Let her flap in the wind for a bit. Seriously. Let her reach out when she's done having a hissy fit. I know people like this and I simply will not accept their guilt. They are all thunder and no action-- they can talk about how unfair it is-- whatever. Roads go both ways. Is she *incapable* of visiting you? Would she have been incapable of coming to where you were for a visit?

Like I said, if it were me, I'd give her time to get over herself and let her reach out first when she's done trying to punish you. I don't deal with immature 12 year olds-- which is what she's behaving like. Good grief.

Why didn't she come to where you were? Why are you the one running all over the place? I hate that. You go visit family and you are expected to continue with all the running around.

I would not contact her again. I like the idea of a letter explaining your feelings to her. The fact that she has never come to visit you at your home is telling. Sounds like she likes to be pissed at people. Just a thought.

I think you handled it the same way I would. You have every right to be hurt, I would be if I was you. That was really unfair. I'm not sure the age of your sister, or yourself, is she still in her early 20's, sounds very immature. The facebook wouldn't bother me either, but truly showing her immaturity. Does she even have a family, I mean husband and kids? One day she'll realize, hopefully she'll grow up in the meantime.

hugs going out to you!!!

High maintenance personalities, will always be high maintenance. And no one can ever, satisfy them.
And, for that kind of person, it is never their fault or their responsibility.
Meanwhile, they hold everyone as a hostage, emotionally.

You CANNOT ever, please people like that.
They will make issues when there are none.
They will make, any normal thing, an emotional hardship for the other person and create so much drama.
You CANNOT ever, satisfy people like that.
And even if you were PERFECT and could read her mind, it still would not be enough, and she will never be satisfied.

People like that are high maintenance and like to "control" people with their antics and passive aggressiveness and egregious imagined hurts. Which they blame others for.

Yeah, she's acting REALLY immature.

But she's your sister. Family. Don't deal with this via text. Call her. If she doesn't answer, try to call her again. Someone has to be mature and resolve this. It obviously isn't going to be her.

If one of my siblings lived out of state, came to visit, and only bothered to visit me once, I'd be fiercely heartbroken. But our situations may not be even remotely similar, so I'm not comparing. You may have tried. She may not have reciprocated. Who knows. Either way, this is your sister. Try to fix it.

Is your sister my brother?

::sigh:: My youngest brother is a drama llama. He has hissy fits over the stupidest things and I've learned to just let him take whatever time he needs to get over himself. He's deleted me off of his Facebook, like, four times now. Including yesterday. I called him to clear up a miscommunication, he took it as criticism, and he hung up on me to boot. I called him back and left a message. I wasn't very nice and called him a spoiled brat. He called me back four hours later to apologize and we worked things out. That's just how he is. He's right, you can't convince him otherwise most times, and I just smile and nod.

IF my brother were still alive, I would do anything I could to see him.

I would be very angry with her. She is a grown woman who is acting like a 4 year old. When is the last time she came to see you? I'm going to guess its been a long time. The fact that she knew all you had planned for your vacation and STILL thought you should drop everything to spend every minute with her or she'd throw a temper tantrum is absurd. The fact that she'd throw away her entire relationship with you is even more absurd than that.

I would suggest sending a written letter to her outlining your feelings and confusion over the situation. Don't apologize unless there is something you really need to apologize for. After the letter was sent out, I'd stop 'chasing' her around. She obviously wants to remain angry and every time she gets a contact from you it's feeding her anger. Let her know, in her letter, that the next move is hers.

My mom and her sister and a back & forth letter correspondence for about 2 years before they both decided to part ways permanently. But at least, at that time, they both felt they had had their say and knew what emotional factors were driving each other. It made the break up much more bearable, even a relief, to the both of them. What started out as hurt feelings ended up with "Good to be done" feelings.

I'm afraid I am going to be dealing with this situation very soon. My sisters are coming to town in a few weeks- the busiest weekend we've had for a while, and it will be tough to carve out time. Add this to the fact that we've been struggling to keep our relationships healthy and it's tough. I don't know you and you sisters ages, but sometimes it's just tough to keep relationships drama free during life phase changes, maybe she's just missing you and having a tough time accepting something.

Yes, she is being immature. But unless things are just toxic, I would say to try to work it out. Sounds like some time and space may work wonders to bring her back. If this is just how she handles things, then you just need to work on not letting it stress you out. This is family, I agree that you should do what you need to work it out, even if that means dealing with her temper tantrum.

I will admit that if I get mad at my sisters, I will 'hide' them on FB, just because it hurts my feelings and riles me up to see them on there. Then when I feel better, I unhide. Bigger step to unfriend! Good luck.