What's Best for Her?

I think you should do what the case worker tells you to do and document the effort. If there is no actual case, then I would not make the extra effort. I would make the mother prove interest in her child...or not...and take steps to obtain legal custody of the child. My nephew found out the hard way that with no CO, he has only as much "right" as his child's mother allows. If you keep her, you should make it official.

I think you should keep her longer. If her mother hasn't been spending much time with her, that speaks to the kind of mother she will be -- i.e. not a good one. I think she's more interested in her boyfriend.

Maybe you should continue to raise this child. The mother does not sound ready. Marda has very wise advice.

Are you ready to be the child's mom?

You already are. Can you take it on full time?

If yes, do it. I know someone who did it and it's the most rewarding relationship for them both.

Follow your heart, and do what's best for the baby. You can't fix your daughter.

Does your daughter WANT to raise her child?
Because it doesn't sound like she wants the child back.
The child has bonded with you - she's going to be traumatized when ever she leaves you to go live with someone else.
Your daughter is putting her boyfriend ahead of her kids and it doesn't sound like child raising is her main priority.

It sure would be tough turning that little girl over to a "mother" that has put forth the minimum effort to help her daughter.
Adopt her!

This child is obviously not a priority for your daughter. It is sad but your daughter is displaying her true colors.

In no way, would I put a child in an environment that I did not know was 100% safe and the child a priority.

In this case, I'd file to adopt my grandchild in order to save her from her bio mom and who knows is in the house with her.

Put this child's safety first. Yiur grandchild relies on you to make sure she is ok. Your daughter does not care about anything but herself.

You should be working with a team of professionals on this one. Your granddaughter may need a guardian ad litem, a case worker/social worker, even a pediatrician or other medical professional. You should be in touch with support for kinship fostering, a family law attorney, probably a family therapist, and someone from your state's administrative body that oversees kinship fostering. In my non-professional opinion, simply handing a toddler over to a stranger, especially at the height of the "stranger-danger" phase, sounds like a horrible idea that could mess her up royally.

Is there not a case worker who can advise you on this? Or are those resources not available in cases that stay within families?

If I were you, I would work with a counselor/psychologist who has experience with reunification of very young children. Someone should be able to observe the mother and baby together and determine where they are in the reunification process and what the next steps are. One of our family therapists actually does this kind of work through the courts and there is a large body of literature, cases etc. that can help inform how/when (if ever) it is best to make the transition.

the childs mother is a "mother",not a" mom,", dont bother to try to get the "mother" fully involved..its not going to happen. instead, look at giving the child what they need..a"mom"..is it gonna be easy? probably not, but you are probably the childs best chance at a decent life. will the "mother" come around? sure, if you win the lottery..otherwise the mother is gonna be in and out of the childs life, file for custody and be done with it. K. h.

Does your daughter want the child back? The fact that she has not made spending time with the child and getting to know the child a priority would make me wonder. Talk with her and the father and set up some kind of visitation to make this adjustment easier, assuming they want the child at all.

Sounds like this little girl is barely on her mom's radar. I think you should be figuring out what is best for your granddaughter. Children are not property unfortunately our court and society treat them this way by putting so much emphasis on biology. Please take time to reflect or pray on the child's best interest and then act on that.

She needs a transition time. I would recommend her spending 5 days a week with her for at least 2 hours a day, with you and then 5 days a week 4 hours a day away from you and then 2 nights a week overnight, and then full time overnight. You should also be sure that she is stable, not using drugs (assuming that has a role with why she was incarcerated). Make sure she's ready for her daughter.

is keeping her for a LOT longer- ie permanently- an option?
cuz it sounds like that's what would be in the best interest of the child.
khairete
S.

Does her mother actually want her? Or is she expecting that you'll be raising her? I think you need to have a sit-down with your daughter to determine just what it is she's planning on doing, or is she's planning leaving her with you.

Looks like mother has her priorities and they are not her daughter. If you love this little person my suggestion is or perhaps thoughts are, why take her to her daughter at all, just wait and see.

I have no answer. But I want to tell you that you are doing an amazing thing by taking care of this little one. Keep up the good work :)

We cant really judge. We dont know whether your daughter is working hard to rebuild a relationship with her boys (how old and how much support they need?) and if that keeps her from taking more time with her youngest. I would not rush this. I would ask my daughter to read about how to bond with an older baby. She needs to go backwards and baby this girl, rock her, give her lot's of time on her lap, spend a lot of time bathing her and brushing her hair, physically bonding with her to make up for the bonding time they missed. She cant just assume that having the little one come live with her will create an instant bond, and losing you could be traumatic to your grandaughter