Today I received an email from my sister describing her visit with another sister. It was hilarious, and I laughed out loud at a number of her comments. When my daughter (14) asked me what was funny, I told her how Aunt X was describing her visit with Aunt Y. My daughter said, 'Mom, you're not being CATTY, are you?' With humor, of course, a little conspiring tone (can't imagine where she gets THAT!).
I have three sisters (well, 4 counting my SIL who is a jewel). We are all very close, we enjoy each other's company, support each other's choices, but still are not above poking a little fun at each other from time to time.
I personally always thought of 'cattiness' as sort of a deliberate action on the part of two or more friends, to exclude another friend. Not so much sharing a giggle about a friend when said friend is not present.
So what do you think? Where my one sister and I committing cattiness against the third sister? Even though we all know we talk about each other frequently, with humor and fondness, but with honesty as well?
If so, man, we are the cattiest bunch of sisters alive! And it's worked very well for us for 44 years!
Thanks Ladies, have a great night!
:)
I think the key to cattiness is sneaky so if y'all know you do it there really isn't anything sneaky about it.
Stinky agrees it just isn't catty without the sneaky factor. Now where is my dinner.....
when i think of "catty" i think "negative, conspiring, mean-spirited" so i don't think you and your sisters are catty with each other. you all just sound really close and fun!
To me, cattiness has a slight undertone of meanness about it. Like, although, you're "joking", deep down, you *really* think those nasty things. What you're doing with your sisters doesn't sound catty to me - it sounds like honest, real, sister relationships and the teasing and fun that goes along with that. In fact, it sounds just like MY relationship with MY sister!
I think it's more the "spirit intended" than the action or comment.
For example, I have O. sibling that is very characteristically late. All. The. Time. It's just part of him.
We make reference to that all the time, but he knows how he is! LOL
I say very few things that I wouldn't (and haven't) said to someones face personally. Even on this board. I call a spade a spade and people don't like it. Too bad.
I find it amusing how people can send me nasty PMs because I don't "agree" with them. Many people think if they get nasty enough, you'll change your mind. Ummm...no. I mean it' great to point out facts and examples, but not to the point of blindly following something someone they perceive as being "in the know" or "in power" tells them to say. If there's O. thing I cannot stand it's someone who simply regurgitates the buzz words of the day.
But I digress.
Cattiness is all about the intent and the attitude.
And I agree with your theory about deliberate exclusion.
Ever notice how when someone is pushed to the wall and reflected in a bad light, they tend to resort to the old junior high trick of "chumming up" with everyone? Same thing. The reaction to cattiness is to try to preserve their own arse!
You've got a lot of nerve Theresa--asking this Q and then going to bed! LOL
Here's a good example. Responding to this question by saying "oooh I can use a name or two but that wouldn't be right.." Now THAT is cattiness and biotchiness!
I would equate cattiness with bitchiness. It doesn't sound to me like you were being catty!
Your post made me miss my sisters! I have a very similar relationship with my 2 sisters. We are like the 3 Muskateers. We get a good laugh at each others expense quite a bit. But we love each other and would do anything for each other. And, NO you were not being catty. I think being catty is when someone is being petty and bitchy. Doesn't sound like you :)
Ditto all the below responses defining cattiness. There is an underlining meanness covered up by false interest.
It sounds like your daughter is just learning the word and trying it out on you to check your personal definition. Perhaps she has heard it from other girlfriends at school? And those types of girlfriend relationships can, for sure, be catty.
Your and your sisters sound like healthy, fun, phenomenal gals.
PS - what does Rot Roh Raggy mean?
Do you remember back in the old days when one person would say something a little insulting or tit for tat, malicious...and someone else (often a guy) would do the "reowww" noise like a cat, or hiss? That's when you know for sure you're being catty. :P
I know what cattiness is because I have two felines upstairs doing it right now.
But seriously... Being catty is being "slyly spiteful and malicious," according to the dictionary. And it's only fun when everybody is laughing. Was your daughter not laughing? You might ask her why - not in order to tell her she's wrong, but because you can know her better by her answer. Females don't know everything about each other, and you might get some insight into things she has to deal with every day.
It is possible for cattiness to be performed by one person, not just two or more, and performed if the person being catted about is either present or absent. I know from first-hand experience. I won't tell you what I was doing.
I find it fascinating that my sons (age 15 & 24) consider all of the women in our family to be somewhat catty, bitchy, mouthy, & funny ....all at the same time. To them, each of these terms mean the same thing.
It all breaks down to symantics, doesn't it? !!
