What Do You Think About Posting Labor Progress on Facebook?
Updated on
May 21, 2011
V.T.
asks from
McKinney, TX
39
answers
I have many friends who's husbands post their labor progress on Facebook. The one I just saw was "She's getting sick a lot, but she's doing great." Or I often see how many centimeters along they are. I guess the wives don't care, but personally, I would be upset if my husband posted this stuff on Facebook. Am I the only one that would be upset? I don't mind if he posts on the way to hospital, but the next post should be, baby XYZ is here, not my current status. And really, I don't want to read about labor progression. And while I'm talking about what I don't want to read, to the guy that posted a picture of his son's poop in the potty, I don't want to see that either. I'm happy he pooped on the potty, I was estatic when my daughter pooped on the potty, but i didn't want to capture it on film and share it with the world. (Sorry, last part was a vent)
I think it's funny that people think that their facebook world even cares about labor progression.
I can't imagine how updating facebook about giving birth could fall under the catagory of "education".
People do tend to overshare! Thankfully, with one little *click* we can go on to better things.
@Pamela, I am a big proponent of education, but I believe the birth of a child is a precious time, not an opportunity to push an agenda. Forcing a view on someone isn't education. The funny thing is, many of my friends choose homebirths, and each story is beautiful and a joy to hear. If they were pushing their views on me, assuming that I was ignorant, I wouldn't want to listen, because such an attitude is degrading.
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A.C.
answers from
Springfield
on
I think it's awesome to be able to do that! I'm having a baby in August and I live miles away from my family and close friends so I know they would love to read stuff like that as well as see a few photos here and there. The only problem is that my Hubby isn't facebook savy so I'll probably be the one posting all the updates! :)
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C.O.
answers from
Washington DC
on
Nope, in MY OPINION, it's just tmi....
they can find out when all is said and done...that's MY take!
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A.V.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Hahaha, I guess I am one of those tacky people. After I got my epidural I was all about posting my own progress on FB. Not that I included really graphic details but just general stuff about waiting around and that I thought epidurals were AMAZING. The people on my FB are all close friends and family so it saved some time on having to text or call everyone. I was bored. . .and there was nothing else to do at 3 in the morning.
The way I see it, if you don't like it, don't read it :P You can always ignore other people's posts on your newsfeed.
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R..
answers from
Chattanooga
on
Lol. I was the one who posted on FB during my labor... (I was in labor for over 20 hours... not counting the extra 10 hours a couple days before during a failed induction...) I wanted something to take my mind off the pain, plus my family was on the other side of the country. BUT only friends and family are on my FB... and they were cheering me on! lol. I was posting things like 'Good lord this sucks! when is baby getting here?' and 'Decided to get that epidural... Aaah, I just fell in LOVE with my anesthesiologist!!!' 'dialated to a 5, 1/2 way there!' etc. etc. etc.... I didn't get into any gross details but I did keep everyone posted. I figure that if someone doesn't want to read it... they could hide my posts for the next few hours... or just ignore it.
I actually like seeing progressions on facebook from the people I know... it makes me feel like I can be involved without actually BEING there.
as far as the poop... hmm. was it at least an interesting color? (LOL... just kidding... that is taking it too far.)
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D.P.
answers from
Pittsburgh
on
I agree with Dawn B 100%.
It's tacky and low class to post labor progress (and--God forbid--video coverage) of your labor & birth on FB or other social networking sites.
Guess what? (and tell me if I'm wrong here) We all go through labor/delivery in the best way for EACH of us. I don't wanna see/be told about anyone else's cooter! LOL Especially those t=with an agenda to "push" so to speak.
Why is it that those who are the least likeable/most obnoxious/most pushy about their private agendas ASSUME anyone else gives a flip and seem to want to cram it down everyone elses throats.
Seriously, even my closest friends--all I want to hear is THAT the baby is here and the health of mom & baby.
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A.C.
answers from
Savannah
on
A good friend of mine from highschool just had a baby 2 days ago (woohoo!) and we were very excited. For geographical reasons, many people couldn't come. Her mother passed away so her twin sister (also a good friend!) was the one in the room and "in charge" of updates and being "the bad guy" to people who were excited and wanted to visit, etc.
Mom to be posted "Let the games begin" on FB to announce she was at the hospital. Lots of people commented---well wishers, some had questions, others had silly jokes. It was good! I suppose people started burning up mom to be's phone (I don't know why, it would never occur to me to do so) and her sister took over the FB on mom to be's page and said "Ok, Carla here, I'm in charge of updates, the phone is turned off" and she'd just say (like 8 hours later) that everyone was fine, they had given her the pit drip, or whatever, and that the baby was taking her time. She also posted that mom to be was tired and that they really didn't want visitors or anything until they announced to do so (small town, lots of family and friends around). The final announcement, with a picture of the beautiful baby, was exciting. I don't see anything wrong at all with keeping people who love the family posted....it's just WHAT is said may be "too much". We all thought it was awesome and exciting, and it was nice to chat amongst ourselves (some people, I haven't seen in 15 years) about the good news as it came through.
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M.V.
answers from
New York
on
Gosh, isn't ANYTHING sacred anymore?
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J.R.
answers from
San Diego
on
To each his own. A friend of mine posted my labor progress on FB for our friends, although it wasn't super detailed. Just that I was at the hospital, then pushing, then baby was born. I didn't see any of it until later and didn't know she was doing it, but it was very touching to see how many of my friends were cheering me on and how excited everyone was when the baby was born. I actually took screen captures of all the posts on my wall to include in her baby book. It's a lovely testament to how much she's been loved right from the beginning.
The great thing about FB is that you can hide people's statuses if they consistently post things you don't want to read. I have done this with a number of people.
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T.K.
answers from
Dallas
on
yuck. labor is very private. i dont mind a proud birth announcement, but lets show some class!
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T.F.
answers from
Dallas
on
TMI for me. I don't need to know all the details. Just tell me when the little one arrives!
I deleted an acquaintance from FB because she kept posting sonogram pictures that looked like real pictures. Really... I don't need to see the daily progress.
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K.M.
answers from
Chicago
on
I do not understand people posting updates like that on FB ... I think it is tacky ... I just want to know when the baby gets there ... plus, you can send a text to those who need details if they can not be at the hospital to get them.
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K.K.
answers from
Austin
on
I think it is extremely tacky. Birth is a very personal and intimate time. It is not to be shared with everyone. I doubt those couples posted the play by play details of how the baby got in the womb and people don't need to post the play by play details of how the baby got out.
I have 3 children and with all 3 I have had people just assume they would be invited to the birth. I started telling people that if they were present during the making of the baby they could be present during the birth. Needless to say the only people present were my husband and me and my supportive midwife. I did not even tell anyone I was in labor. It is a private time. As a society we need to go back to keeping some things private. Not everything has to be broadcast.
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B.B.
answers from
Atlanta
on
To each his own. You can always hide their posts. Lol. This way you can view them only when you want to and they won't be in your live feed.
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N.G.
answers from
Dallas
on
I think to each his own. Some people are more private than others. What's the harm? I have some very close family members on my FB. I'm sure they would appreciate it if I posted something like that if I were in the situation.
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K.K.
answers from
Iowa City
on
Doesn't bother me at all. Though no I do not want to see pics.
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M..
answers from
St. Louis
on
Ewwww! My friends and I have a rule that we dont talk about periods, potty training or any type of bodily fluid on facebook, who wants to hear about that? My husband thinks facebook is ridiculous. I have had several friends that bring their laptops to the hospital with them, which I also think is silly, you really cant find anything else to do while your in labor or just welcoming a brand new baby into the world, you need to be on facebook. Im not. I think its strange.
Sorry, another pet peeve with facebook, when people are out having a good time, and giving a play by play of their whole night and posting pictures of it. Really? If you having such a good time why are you constantly on facebook? I facebook when Im bored, not when Im out with REAL people. Geez. How much attention do you need?
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M.J.
answers from
Sacramento
on
Ick to all of it! No, way too much information.
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M.K.
answers from
Kansas City
on
I'm with you. Not a fan.
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T.S.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Well I love updates on labor progression, as long as it's short, sweet and not graphic.
Also, it absolutely should be OK with the one in labor!!!
And if any of my FB friends decide to start posting photos of their kid's poop, I will "hide" them from that moment on, eeewww!!!
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L.S.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
I'd call both of those examples an "over-share."
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S.J.
answers from
St. Louis
on
You're funny....
People will always post way too much info on facebook and other social networking sites. One gal I have as a friend on there posts details about her ailments....even goes so far as to post pics of her most recent rashes, scars, etc. Yummy!!!
It honestly wouldn't bother me if my husband posted updates like centimeters dilated, etc. But, I am more laid back than most I think....esp given what I see on this site. Lol
So, hide the people if they annoy you so you don't have to read their posts/updates - my only advice.
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P.M.
answers from
Tampa
on
I'll be having a Home Birth VBAC... and I will definitely be updating my social networking sites (or my husband if I'm unavailable) as well as video documenting everything. It is important to me on so many levels that I let all my friends and family know that my choice for a Home Birth is going well - because I will not want anyone there but my husband and 5 y/o daughter.
Some people prefer to educate and share others even when they are in pain or in situations in where others run and hide.
******@ Sunshine*******
Education can be found in almost everything. In this situation - showing women you don't have to have your feet up in stirrups, lay flat on your back, tied to the bed due to fetal monitoring and IVs, having many hands up your vagina and having an OB who's ready to slice you open at any time - is definitely a form of much needed education.
***@ Sunshine and Dawn ****
You can spout all day that showing an alternative and safe way to birth a baby as 'pushing propaganda or an agenda" - doesn't make your statement truthful. Majority of my friends on FB are close friends and family and classmates of my Nursing School. They ALL know me to be very natural in my approach to birthing, breastfeeding, etc - and ALL of them have either had OB hospital births or cesareans. So yes, my FB ppl would be very curious and interested in learning that in fact having a VBAC or Homebirth (both in my situation) can be done without surgical or medical interventions.
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C.N.
answers from
Baton Rouge
on
Doesn't bother me if people want to post dilation or potty training progress.
What WOULD bother me was if the person who was supposed to be my labor coach was paying more attention to his iPhone than to me.
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T.L.
answers from
St. Louis
on
I am weird I posted my progress on my FB, BUT I only have family and a few friends on my page. I probably have the least amount of friends because I only allow family and people I speak to every week. :) This way they can check my page instead of constantly sending me text messages.
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T.M.
answers from
Philadelphia
on
It doesnt bother me. I think it is kind of neat. Especially if i am close to the person.
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J.K.
answers from
Kansas City
on
TMI - leave everyone in suspense
I agree with you in that it's ok to post when the baby has arrived
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D.
answers from
Houston
on
I'm with you on that. However, if you do post stuff about being in labor you should also post when the baby is born. A friend left us all hanging....what the heck happened? Did you get a kid or not? Grrrr!
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K.B.
answers from
Tulsa
on
Are there photos of her privates?
My exBIL videod EVERYTHING and shared it at a party while the wife was cooking. INAPPROPRIATE and DISGUSTING.
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J.J.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
people post far too much on FB. Which is the reason Ive deleted almost everyone from mine, except close friends & family & even then, some are blocked from my newsfeed. I cant imagine ANYONE, close family or otherwise, needing such personal updates. If they did, they'd either be there for the moments, or be in telephone contact, for updated info.
A picture of a poop, that would totally irritate me!
People who post every detail of their "life" on FB, have no life.
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A.F.
answers from
Chicago
on
Ick! I am glad none of my friends' hubbies do that! Mine WILL NOT be doing that! There are VERY FEW people that I tell my dilation/effacement status to (unless you count my post here last week when I bled after my internal). But I will not be posting my labor status. I may post "Today is the day" when I head to the hospital....and then of course birth stats after -- but who really really needs to know the details of the in-between? Really? Potty-poop photos -- YUCK! You need to defriend or hide a few people IMHO :) ha!
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J.S.
answers from
Chicago
on
My husband posted my progress on our facebook account...Nothing detailed with dilation, etc., just when we arrived, got the pain meds, and when I was ready to go, and finally when she arrived. BUT our facebook is composed ONLY of family & very close friends. We aren't those who have hundreds of "friends" just because. So, for us it was more for our family to know what was going on, especially since we have so much family out of state. However, if we did have random people as our friends, I would NOT be happy about it. It's a personal moment in your life, and should be treated as that!
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M.D.
answers from
Minneapolis
on
I had a friend who had a baby 2 years ago and her husband kept everyone posted as to how she was doing and when she and their baby would want visitors come.
When I had my twins 5 almost 6 years ago my husband emailed his friends after they were born and let them all know how they were (since they were born at 34 weeks) and how I was doing (it was a horrible pregnancy, too many complications). He also kept them in the loop whenever I did have to go to the hospital and when I did our one friend who worked down by the hospital came and visited me, and she was the first "non family" person to see the twins.
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K.C.
answers from
Orlando
on
I did post updates via Facebook on my phone, while in the hospital with my second. Most of our family lives hours, or states, away, but they all have facebook. If someone didn't want to read it all they had to do is click "unfriend" haha
I didn't post anything too detailed or "gross" or even personal. I posted on the way to the hospital and then when the "doctor said it won't be long now, she should be here within the hour" little things like that. It also helped to keep my mind off of pain and such, when I could read peoples kind comments.
To each their own.
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D.P.
answers from
Greenville
on
Obviously these people want others to hide their posts permanently. Because that is what I would do. lol
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C.W.
answers from
Washington DC
on
It wouldn't bother me to read a post about how many centimeters dilated someone was, her labor progress, etc. I have a friend that did just that and that is how we knew she was in labor and how far a long she was and she was the one that posted it. If you don't want to read it, then don't. I draw the line at a picture of pooping on the potty or anything truly gross, but I don't see anything gross about centimeters dilation. Now that I have a smart phone, I will probably post labor status too.
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A.B.
answers from
Pittsburgh
on
Ew. Our cousin did this w/his wife - right down to centimeters dilated, baby's station and effacement. Really?!
I remember joking to my husband that if I was in labor and he was at his computer posting a play-by-play when he should have been helping me, I would have punched him in the face. LOL.
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L.Z.
answers from
Boston
on
First of all, M.R., is there really a STFU Parents on FB? I am very excited to go home from work today and check that out! That is right up my alley! I am NOT only not a fan of posting labor progress (major oversharing), but as a fairly active FB member, I observe that many parents use it as a bragging tool for themselves and their kids, and their parenting in general. Almost daily I see examples of people posting every little cutesie thing their kid says and does, ranging from toilet training to saying something sweet to a sibling to their report card grades. It's just another example of the attitude many in this self-obsessed culture have about themselves; that no one is better or more important! This is why I use FB to catch up with old high school or college friends, and leave it at that. If I posted what was really "on my mind" it would be pretty funny!
I agree that announcing the birth is totally appropriate and a great way to use a social networking site. Vent away, V., there are many who agree with you!!
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B.B.
answers from
Evansville
on
It wouldn't have bothered me and doesn't bother me with other people. I find it interesting to know how things are progressing so I'm fine with updates as long as there aren't any pictures of the process. Lol