Wedding/Shower Gift Giving

I'm a event planner, and in my experience from all types of showers, I'd get a wedding gift and a shower gift. If you are not able to attend the shower, you do not need to get a gift.

Yes, absolutely 2 gifts if you are attending the shower and the wedding. If you are not attending the shower then I would give a little more for the wedding gift and no shower gift. If you are not attending the wedding then I would give a very generous shower gift.
I just always make sure that my gift covers the cost of my attendance plus a little extra for the actual gift. So in PA, I would give $200 for the wedding gift assuming that it cost the couple about $150 for my husband and I to attend their wedding plus a little extra.

Yes - if you are going to the shower, a gift for the shower - then another for the wedding. If you can't attend the shower, I don't think you need to send a gift - or maybe just a small well-wishing one. Fun stuff huh?

You are supposed to give a gift for the shower and one for the wedding. I have never heard of the shower gift being the wedding gift. That must be a new thing?

For a couples shower, you could do a gift certificate to their favorite restaurant. I have also done a nice bottle of wine with 2 glasses. I put them in a basket and filled the 2 wine glasses with chocolates :)

Do you mean a bridal shower if so then yes 2 gifts. If not then what do you mean by couple shower?

I would say only give a gift for the shower if you are attending. Otherwise 1 wedding gift is appropriate.

If they are super close friends then both. But if not and you are not attending the shower I'd just buy the wedding gift....a nice one.

Guess what--you are not obligated to give a gift at all. That should take some pressure off. Sounds harsh, but gifting should not be so difficult. If it doesn't come more naturally or comfortably, then it's not for you. If you insist on gifting, one is enough, especially within the same time-frame.

If you are not attending the shower, just bring a wedding gift to the wedding. If the bride is your very best friend and you can't attend the shower, I'd give a shower gift also and bring her the shower gift ahead of time so she has it at the shower. If you end up being able to go to the shower, then bring a gift to it. It doesn't have to be expensive, since you are also bringing a wedding gift to the wedding.

A couple's shower meaning both bride and groom there, with men and women there to have fun and celebrate? I believe you don't need to buy two gifts (but can get scented candles with chocolates and a little lingerie piece (tasteful)) or give a card and express your enthusiasm for the wedding, then give wedding gift. But if you are NOT going to the shower, just send a polite RSVP and then get the gift for the wedding.

No, it is not necessary to buy two separate gifts. However, whenever I am in this position, I prefer to do two smaller gifts so that I do bring one to each event. It's your preference, really. However, wedding etiquette is one gift for a couple. You will not be the "rude one" if you buy them one gift. You can always buy them a gift and then take a decent bottle of champagne or wine to the couple's shower. Or make it fun and do some sort of romantic gag gift.

what is a couple shower? I only give one gift per wedding. So if I gave a gift at a shower, I don't give them another gift at the wedding. Showers imply wedding gifts in my mind. But I'm not quite sure if that is what your talking about. If I don't attend the shower, then I simply given them one gift at the wedding.

ADDED: That sounds more like an engagement party to me I guess and not a shower. I guess we all have different rhetoric for things. If I go to a wedding shower, where the purpose is to give gifts to a couple because they are getting married, then is that not the same as giving them a gift at the wedding because they are getting married? I have never known people to do two wedding gifts and often the shower gifts that I've seen people receive are gifts from their wedding registries.

If it's what I would consider an engagement party, I could understand more just getting something small like some wine and glasses or something along those lines, which seems to be what most people are describing anyway. But, I would think if you don't go, your not really obligated to get them anything, unless you just want to cause they are good friends.

if your not able to attend the shower then you just rsvp that your sorry you can't attend. no gift is neccesary unless they are close friends. I would say a gift would be expected if you attend the wedding and or shower. and couples showers are fun I have been to one.

If you're attending both, two gifts.

If you're not attending the shower, r.s.v.p. as such and you don't need to send a gift.

But you do need to give a gift for the wedding. Even if you're not going. Really, it's proper to send a gift to the bride's home BEFORE the wedding.

AND if you're especially close to the couple, I would send a shower gift as well.

It depends on how well you know this couple. If they are close friends or family, you might want to send them something small as a shower gift, even if you don't go to the shower. But if they are just casual acquaintances and you don't attend the shower, then you can skip the shower gift. A wedding gift should be enough.

I only give one gift. Of course I'm still young and broke.