Too Much or Too Little?

Bethany,

You could also let the older girl give a few things as a big sister...right of passage sort of thing. When you are X-years old you are old enough to GIVE... So she will be excited to WATCH the younger open "Her" gifts. That way you can explain that the younger sister isn't old enough to understand more/less, and the joy of giving someone else a gift.

T.

Well, that all depends on what she believes about Santa. My 9 year old just now knows, so she understands that it is real money being spent. We have always given our 5 children the same number of presents, but not the same "value" of gifts. What that actually means is that I spend way less on my younger children. Because, you are right, if you spend the same on both children, the 2 year old will have a TON. So, I might suggest cutting back on her stuff a bit, and then balancing it out with some extra's for your oldest. Should she "learn a lesson"..maybe, but she is still only 8 at honestly, I dont think Christmas morning is the time for teaching life lessons. Part of the fun is in the opening, not necessarily what is inside the gift. I buy things that I would normally be buying anyway. This year my girls are even getting their own shampoo and conditioner, brushes, hair stuff, and toothbrush with toothpaste. I would buy those things anyway, but I have out them together in a cute little container to help fill in because their gifts are more expensive. Teach her humility all through the season. Help her go through her toys and pick out some nice ones to give away. Give to the Salvation Money cans..you get the idea. And then, let Christmas morning be about the kids, and enjoy it! ~A.~

I think value is a very important lesson, but if it's not something you know she understands already, it probably won't register on Christmas day when she's finished opening her presents and her little sister still has a stack left to open. I think some filler gifts would work, or maybe less gifts for the younger one.

At 25 months, your younger daughter will probably be just as happy with 5 presents as 10. As adults, we want to be equitable with our kids, but we also need to remember that a 2 year old won't know how much that netbook cost as compared to her baby doll or a little people playhouse. I try to keep it even in numbers, not in monetary value, when they are that young. When your youngest gets old enough to understand value, that's when you'll have to worry about keeping the cost of the gifts more equitable.

Blessings,
N.

I think she will understand when she gets the computer. If you feel she NEEDS to open more gifts, wrap up some necessities like socks, undies, etc...

Of course, this is coming from someone who hates clutter.

GL and Happy Holidays!

My kids are aren't 8 yet, so maybe I am wrong- but I am pretty sure that an 8 yo can understand value. I also agree that this should be a process that you can work on all year for next Christmas. But for this year, would it help if she "helped" her sibling upwrap his or her gifts? Would that go over well with the toddler? You might also try taking her shopping to pick out a present for her sibling/father/grandparents etc, to get her in the giving spirit. I tried that this year and had my 3.5 yo give her 2yo sister a birthday present. We bought it and wrapped it together and she was so excited to see her open it that she didn't even notice that there were no presents for her. Good luck and Merry Christmas!

Maybe if she doesn't understand, it's about time she learns. She's getting some really expensive/nice gifts that most 8 yr olds do not get. I'm sure she'll turn around once she opens them. If not, perhaps you should have her donate them to someone who'd appreciate them??

I totally agree with Amber. She's getting some awesome gifts, no doubt.....better than I'm getting and I'm an adult, buying for myself, lol! But it's gonna take a concentrated effort to teach those kinds of lessons all year long, not just drop it on them on Christmas day. I remember I was in 4th grade when mom had that talk with me (I was getting a bike and stereo, so not so many gifts) but I DID know that Santa wasn't real so it was mom trying to come up with money, and I was perfectly ok with that. She actually gave me the choice: you can have a bike and stereo and just a couple other small surprises, OR you can have a lot of small gifts but no bike or stereo. What would you rather? I kinda wanted a lot of gifts, but the idea of letting my best friends see my new "cool" gifts was much better. My oldest is 3 but we try to teach him things in a way he can understand on a regular basis, already. It's a process, and not easy, but well worth it.

I think at this age that she can understand that her stuff is more expensive and for older girls. But I also understand kids seeing the quantity and not quality of stuff also. Just to make sure there's no whining and upset, at least for this year, I would fill in with underwear, socks, maybe hair stuff if she's into that, cheap little jewelry, maybe even a small bottle of cheap perfume. Just stuff to open and count.

I believe she'll understand when she sees her gifts. My daughter (one and only child) gets very nice things...she knows if there are just a couple of gifts under the tree..that it is a "good sign".

At 15 (on 12/27) she is getting $$$$ because she loves to shop and she has expensive tastes. She is a better shopper, quality wise, when I am not there to pay for her!! They get more frugal when it comes from their own pockets!!

Now I do put a lot of filler in the stocking, etc. Roll up $1, 5, 10 or whatever bills, wrap up her favorite candies, etc.

Happy Holidays!