C., please don’t feel obligated to read this whole response. And I hope you will forgive me if this doesn't feel kind – my intentions are entirely kind to tender life everywhere. So, up front, it may be perfect for you to have another child; I only hope you will wait until you are certain that's what is right for you. That can only be your own choice.
This response is overflowing with the pain I’m feeling with the state of the whole crazy world, so ladies, I excuse you in advance unless you feel able to consider my views. It may seem a bit off-topic, but I’m hoping for a more expanded picture. I’m awfully tired, so perhaps should hold my silence until I’m less disturbed. I have hardly been sleeping. Last night was one of many during which I have struggled and cried and prayed over the suffering of children in the world, trying to understand how to help those people who are least equipped to cope and adapt. Especially children, whose pain is so evident in every level of existence.
It’s a simple fact that we are designed to reproduce – God/Nature/Life worked it out it so we adore babies, we want babies, we even crave babies enough to willingly face the pain and challenges of birthing and raising them. And we have become so successful as a species that we're now quite capable of ruining the earth for ourselves and most other life. (I'll note that we’re designed to love eating, too, but for health and comfort we learn to live within reasonable bounds.)
There's no right number of kids for any particular woman; some will have several, some none. But too many of us are making too many babies, already to the detriment of every baby's future. Population pressure is already harming health, opportunity, innocence and hope in poorer areas. Too much consumption of natural resources and space, too much garbage, too much toxic pollution, too much social stress, too much competition for space, jobs, and in some places even air, water, food, or farmable land.
Moms, I might be losing my mind, but I don't think it's just me. We humans are SEVEN BILLION STRONG and increasing quickly – when I was born in 1947, there were "only" about a third as many souls, but social scientists and agronomists were already deeply concerned about population growth, resource depletion, and pollution. And now it’s clear that we’ve changed the environment, probably irreversibly.
It's far too easy to numb ourselves with bread and circus, with more of everything we can possibly desire, and that's all that some of us learn to live for. We're the greatest consumers in the world. I have chosen to stop with one child and live simply for the health of the world, and I may be one of the lowest-income participants on this board… but I'm pretty damn comfortable compared to many mothers and children today, even right here in our own great nation.
I expect some annoyed readers will report this, but please notice that I'm not trashing anything beyond our “want it – have it now” economic model. I'm not angry, just terribly sad for all the suffering and deprivation I’m seeing in children everywhere. I believe the whole blessed world in in some degree of crisis. Action, new choices, and change are very much needed.
A note of hope that keeps me going sometimes: Crisis is good IF it prompts us to be more responsible, loving, and creative. Change for the better seldom happens without crisis. I’m reaching for responsible and creative ways to care for this beautiful world, and all the beautiful children we have already birthed.