Terrible 2'S

My son will be two on the 19th and he does the same thing. I've had a potty for a couple of months now, and he has refused to sit on it or even go near it. Last night he came and told me he pooped and I needed to change his diaper so he knows the concept. So I asked him if he wanted to sit on the big potty and he finally said yeah after me asking 1000 other times. So I took off his poopy diaper and sat him on the toilet and he actually sat for little while, then he tried to wipe like mommy does and he was done. He knows exactly what to do, minus the wiping thing, we'll have to work on that. I just think when they are ready they will let you know. I've heard boys will take longer than girls do. But then again every kid is different. I'm having a new baby in April, so I don't want to push the potty training thing until after the baby is here, way too much for him to handle. I don't want to have to potty train him twice.
Good Luck!

First off, I don't see how anyone could survive multiple 2-yr-old experiences. Having a 2 yr-old is birth control for me! I'm only on my second and I don't think I'd make it through another :-)

Since you have 3 other kids, you're certainly more experienced in this arena than I am, but I'm currently in the throes of toilet training my son, and it seems like I just finished with my daughter....
One thing I've learned is that you can lead a kid to a potty, but you can't make him pee in it.
I also believe that if I have to do more work and more thinking than the kid....then he's not ready. Going potty is HIS job, not mine.

You say he's ready but by the description of this potty training experience, I'd have to say he's not. Physiologically, boys typically aren't "ready" until they're nearly 3. Sure, there are kids who differ from this, but I'm speaking of averages. Also, not only does readiness involve the ability to control "output" and understand simple instructions, but also the ability to recognize the signs that he needs to go, the ability to dress and undress himself independently, and the willingness to go. It's the part about willingness to go that messes up our plans of a diaper-free existence. Since when is a 2 yr old willing to do ANYTHING? I'm met with a tantrum if I offer milk in a blue cup instead of a red one. Should I be surprised that I get resistance when I ask him to use the potty? This is reason enough to stick with diapers for a while longer and save my sanity.
Pretty much everyone I know with a boy waited until they were nearly 3, or just after their 3rd birthday, and got the job done pretty quickly. Those of us who began the process earlier spend way more time involved in it, and have way more poop and pee on our floors. I certainly did not intend to potty train before 2 1/2 with my son. My daughter potty trained right at age 2, but we had all sorts of control battles, regressions and set-backs for the next year. However, he wanted to be like his big sister, so I unwillingly entered potty-land several months earlier than I wanted. But, I've taken a completely hands-off approach this time around. Basically, we ask if he needs to go at logical times -- before sittig down to eat, before leaving the house, before bath, etc. If he goes, GREAT, he gets to put a sticker on an airplane printout (yes, we call it the potty plane...). If not, that's great too!
If he wants to wear underwear (which he prefers), GREAT! You can wear whichever pair you can put on. We give a little talk about how the underwear needs to stay dry, then be sure to ask about going potty at the times I mentioned earlier. If he has an accident, that's ok, get another pair of undies. If he wets himself because he was being defiant and didn't go potty when asked, "that's too bad. Guess we'll have to wear a diaper/pull-up for a while until you're ready to potty again."
I don't know if what we're doing is right or wrong, but we have seen him systematically progress through each stage of potty readiness over the past several months. Awareness, control, etc. Just recently, at 2 and 9 months, he can completely dress and undress himself head to toe without our help. He'll even turn around his shirt on his own if he gets it backwards. For whatever reason, this skill has brought us to a new level of potty training, where he can be dry for a couple hours at a time. It must have something to do with large motor development and independence, because a lot of our potty battles with our first child were over when she'd mastered that skill as well.
I know we'll get there eventually, and I'm trying to stay cool about the process.

As far as removing the diaper and smearing poop everywhere....ack! I've actually seen this problem discussed before on Mamasource. Seems like some good solutions were to put the diaper on backwards, use a pull-up (if it's harder to get off than a diaper), and duct tape.

I would have to agree with the other moms that 2 might be a little young for a boy to start, but each child is different. We are just starting to actively train my daughter (she just turned 2 last Friday) and I'm not convinced she is ready either. She has been sitting on the potty when she wants to (no pressure) for several months now and goes some of the time, but it was more just to get her comfortable with it and generate interest. Now, I'm taking her every hour or so. Yesterday was the first day she had NO accidents in her pullup. She was dry all day with the exception of during her nap. What worked for us is that she wanted a sticker chart. We got her a couple of potty books (they have them for boys and girls) and it had a sticker chart in the back, so we made one for her. She LOVES to go on the potty so that she can get a sticker. And, when she stays dry and clean all day (like yesterday), she gets a special treat at the end of the day. I just got a few cheap things like little balls, a neat little cup and some other small things to use as prizes. She also gets a tic tac (she likes the fruit flavored ones) if she is dry all day. This way, she isn't getting candy all day long. I like to use the stickers instead. Anyway, just try to use some incentives and see if that works. I would stop putting too much pressure on him though because that will just make it a battle and as we all know, we can't win with a toddler! As for the poop smearing, duct tape is beautiful thing.

Good luck!

With my son i would tell him mommy has to go potty do you have to go, if he said yes then he would go, if no i would tell him ok then mommy is ganna go. Usually kids will want to go since someone else is doing it. Also, not sure if this is a option for you or how you feel about it, but we have a privacy fence and my son liked to potty outside, so i would let him do that and he would start going more in the bathroom. He hated the potty chair and that "attachment" for the "big" potty, instead he would turn backwards on his knees on the seat and go, since he was too short for his "business" to reach over the side. As far as smearing his poop everywhere, sorry my son hasnt done anything like that (he hates to be or get dirty). Hope this was helpful.

Try to let it go for now. Dont ask him to go potty. What you can try to do is let him know everytime you have to go and let him come in and watch you. It has worked wonders for my son and it makes them feel like it is something fun and grown up that they can do. He can prob sense that it is stressing you out some and making it an unfun experience for him. Dont feel like it is a big deal that he isnt learning as fast as the others did. Maybe he just needs more time and some encouragement. I would just not mention it and i think it will come to him in his own time. I hope that things work out and God bless!

How frustrating for you! I too have 4 kids. My oldest was easy to potty train, but my 4 year old has been a different story. We are finally almost done, but it has been an uphill battle. We had poop smearing issues with one of ours at about the age of 2 and we found duct tape to be very helpful. When we put his diaper on we would wrap a piece of duct tape from front to back - not overlapping- so that we could pull it off to change his diaper.
2 is young for a boy, in general, to be using the potty. Lots of boys are not ready to try until age 3 - but all are different. It may be that he understands the concept, but his body is just not giving him the signal consistently enough yet. If you want to encourage him to use the potty, toss a Cheerio in the bowl and have his daddy show him how to sink it! Also, my nephew got excited when we got him his own urinal. My sister could not keep him out of the bathroom! I think we got it for like $20 at Walmart. I hope that helps.

J. Rogers
www.ToxinFreeHome.biz

It sounds like even though he understands what the potty is for, he's just not ready to potty train. When he's ready, he'll let you know. Until then (and it may be a while) you'll be spinning your wheels driving yourself crazy. I'd suggest laying off the potty training and put him in onsies tucked into pants that are hard to get off. This should help you avoid the smearing thing (I'd hope). He could be the undressing boy genius though. ;)

He's not even 2 so I think that is really really early for a boy. Boys are typically later to learn to talk and potty train. Mine potty trained way earlier than his peers at 2 1/2 and he did it on his own for the most part. Most of them were 3 or older but it seemed like the more pressure they had, the more they resisted. Once they made up their minds, it happened almost all at once. I think like many grown men, they need to think it's their own idea and not their mother's.

My son wasnt ready till bout three and it was still a hassle. I took the diapers away. Closed the doors to the bedrooms and left the bathroom open. It took about 4 days of him running naked. but it worked. Keep your eyes open though if you have furniture he can hide behind, or put his potty chair in the living room or where he spends most his time.