Temper Tamptrums from 2 Year Old

Updated on September 20, 2006
C.Y. asks from Maineville, OH
7 answers

I know this a typical 2 year old action, but my son has just started a day care one week ago after being in private day care since he was born. We have notice a a DRASTIC increase in temper tamptrums since he started. Is this normal and any advice on how to handle these outbursts? They dont seem to happen for any certain reason. Thanks!!

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M.R.

answers from Wheeling on

It's a phase. Most likely he thinks he's being thwarted by the change in everything and now is retesting all his boundaries- physically and socially.

Anytime a child goes through some changes it's bound to be stressful, and children who can't express themselves fully will almost always resort to tantrums.

There are several schools of thought for handling tantrums- some work on some kids, others work on other children.
1) Ignore it- If your child is tantruming for the attention, then ignoring the tantrum works well. Either sit in silence, turn your back, or carry the child to a room where they can't hurt themselves then leave. It works most often than not.
2) Demonstrate your own tantrum- Scream really loud, or as one of my friends does, she sits on the floor and copies their every cry and move. It normally makes them stop just to look at you and make sure YOU'RE okay.
3) Laugh at them. Same principle as above.
4) Distract them- This works best with tickling, because to try any other method of bribery is akin to giving in to the tantrum.

Do not give in to to tantrum. Doing so, will just increase the number of tantrums you have. If this has started since the change in caregivers, find out what their policy is on tantrums. It may be that they give in to have peace, just puts the power back into the hands of a child too young to appreciate it.

However, if you notice your child's tantrums are a result of fear, loud noises, startlement, or any other worrying signals, you may want to have a health care provider take a look to make certain they don't have another issue such as overly sensitive hearing, blood sugar problems, or are just with a caregiver that's not giving care.

Good luck. (BTW, you might want to keep a thin pillow around for the head-banging tantrum. You'll know it when you see it.)

2 moms found this helpful
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A.A.

answers from Kalamazoo on

There are of course many reasons children resort to tantrums, so it is important to figure out the reason and see if you can change anything. However, they are still not acceptable. Children must learn that tantrums are not an appropriate way to communicate. We had a small bout of tantrums when our daughter was 2 1/2. I read in a book that an effective way to handle them was this: When it starts, isolate them (with no one paying attention, it gets old faster). Either walk away or take them to their room and close the door (someplace safe). Tell them that when they are finished you will be back to punish them (be specific). Don't try to talk or reason with them or figure out the problem at that point. When they are finished, go back and administer punishment. Then explain that tantrums are not acceptable and tell/show them what is acceptable. After a week of this, the tantrums were gone at our house....thank goodness. Good luck!!

1 mom found this helpful
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K.P.

answers from Columbus on

My daughter went through that when she first transitioned into a toddler room. The teacher said that often children aren't comfortable enough "letting it out" in a new surrounding so they hold it all in while they're there... but release it all when they get home (where they're comfortable... so I guess that's a good thing).

I would think that you will find that this will be a phase.

When we were having problems, I read the book "The Happiest Toddler on the Block." You can get it from the Columbus Public Library. It had lots of good tips. Like repeat how they're feeling in 2-3 word phrases. Once they stop and realize that you're understanding them, then move on to YOUR message (again, in 2-3 word phrases).

Good luck!

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C.

answers from Cleveland on

If you haven't already, check out his daycare at this link to make sure they are in compliance on all regulations.

www.odjfs.state.oh.us/cdc/query.asp

Good Luck!

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K.D.

answers from Detroit on

Maybe it is becuase of the change or he wants more attention
be patient and watch his behavior a little more if it increases to the point it is hard for the dcare personel to handle it call someone.

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N.W.

answers from Detroit on

C.,
The transition to a new daycare is hard. We moved my son to a new daycare center at 18mos. It took at least 2 weeks to transition. He never cried at the old daycare and for the first 2 weeks at the new center he cried on and off all day. it was really hard...but after that he adjusted and loves it! Is your son verbal? Kids who are less verbal, or are just beginning to speak get very frustrated and that is probably the source of the tantrums. I'm sure as he adjusts and the daycare staff gets to know him, they will subside. IN the meantime encourgage him to "use his words" and show people what he wants. I wouldn't respond to the tantrums. Good luck.

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R.R.

answers from Cincinnati on

I have found my tot has tantrums for these reasons ( & every child is different)
He wants my attention
He can't express himself verbally & really wants to communicate
He wants something that we won't allow
He is over tired
He does not feel well

It's my guess (& this is just a guess- I may be way off) your private daycare provider became able to understand his non verbal signals of communication. My guess is they don't have time to learn those things from each child in a daycare room setting. That change most likely frustrates him. He most likely can't communicate with them as he could in the private setting.

This may all be making him over tired. You could try an earlier bedtime.

I bet once he becomes extremely verbal the tantrums will slow down.
We ignore our sons tantrums & thankfully they are few. I just walk away from him. He calms quickly.

Good luck to you

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