Technology Madness!

It has gotten completely out of hand. Everyone says oh they have activities. Yeah and so what. The kids who grew up before cell phones had activities too. Picked them up at a specific time. If for so e reason, they were still playing game etc., we waited. We also communicated with other parents so we all did not have to drive. I guess that is what is lacking these days, communication-verbal! I see this with my step grandchildren. When they are with me phone goes off. When they are home, I can't say anything but it makes me crazy. The 15 year old has a movie on her computer, has earplugs in phone, why trying to do dishes (complaining the whole time). I would take everything away if I were my DIL. However, her father says she does not have to do what her mother or my so. Says. That's another story. All this technology will backfire on the kids.

Originally everyone said I want my child to have phone so I know where they Are. That's a joke. They can be anywhere. When my kids said they would be at so and so house, they better be there when I called. I did know where my kids were. Not today.

My 15 yr olds do not have phones. We are looking at getting one that would be shared for activities if my one goes into cross country again next year but otherwise, don't really need them. As for their ipods, yes I watch and restrict both time and what they are allowed. Even for 15 yrs old.

When we get to this stage in life, my plan is to have a basket by the front door for friends' cell phones when they enter the house. If their parents need to get a hold of them, they can call the house or text me on my cell. Most parents in our community feel the same way and also limit unsupervised screen and phone time.

When younger kids (friends of my 8 & 9 year old sons) bring gadgets to our house, I take them and stash them somewhere and give them back when their parents come to pick them up. I gently let them know that they're here to play outside or downstairs, that I'll keep their devices safe and out of the way and they'll get them back later and that in the future, it's a good idea to leave them at home. I have a hard enough time supervising my own kids on the iPad that we let them use, I certainly don't have the time or patience to be supervising other kids, who should be running around and playing with toys and sports, etc. anyway. I am always shocked that other parents let their kids bring these things with them. Our iPad rarely leaves the house and certainly not for a play date.

My 11 year old JUST got his first cell phone - it's an OLD android.
My 13 year old has had his cell phone since he was in the 5th grade - he had baseball and the other had soccer, so we needed to communicate.

My kids KNOW my expectations and restrictions...no phone calls after 9PM unless it's an emergency - and an emergency is classified as fire, death, accident. No calls before 0900...now on school days when my oldest is trying to meet up with someone before school for a study - okay. but it's usually planned the night before.

I view my kids phones EVERY NIGHT...they are NOT allowed Insta-gram, FaceTime, etc. They know if they don't want me to read it or the whole world to see it? They don't text it or "say" it...or take a picture of it.

Luckily, when my kids go to sleepovers - it's about the XBOX or some sport so they aren't plugged in...

My son (8) does not have a phone. But I am curious - what is wrong with facetime? My son Facetimes with his grandparents on my phone and when I am out of town, I facetime with him (he uses DH's phone). Am I missing something?

It's not a sign of the times anymore than letting your kid sit in front of the TV all day was in 1973. I remember the first time I spent time at a friends house where the TV was on ALL THE TIME. I thought it was so weird and kinda gross, even at 7 I knew that was not the way I'd want to live.

I too am amazed at the freedom some parents allow with electronics and social media. So many issues arise when younger kids are given free reign with ANYTHING that requires maturity to use responsibly.

There is nothing wrong with setting limits in your own home for any child staying there. I would also encourage your daughter to have lots of friends and hopefully at least a few from families who also thinks it's crazy to give a 7 year old free reign online.

If that's the norm in their family there will be issues. It's cute you tube videos and texting right now but it'll be sexting and inappropriate posts in a few years. We have seen some pretty crazy stuff over the years and it's always the families who treat technology lightly, don't pay attention to what their kids are doing online and get them started early that have the problems.

Well, it's not your job to micromanage other peoples kids whether they are at your house or not.

Next time tell the parents you don't allow electronics so they need to keep them at home or you'll confiscate them. Watch the parents only allow your kids to come there from then on...

Anyway, it would have been proper for you to call the parents and ask them if it was okay for you to take the electronics so your kids wouldn't be around them or could they come get their kids.

The parents allow their kids to do what they do. Not your place to manage them. You don't want them? Then get rid of them.

And no, it doesn't creep me out. What creeps me out are parents who don't realize the times are not like they used to be. Kids have electronics and they use them 24 hours per day without intervention. We don't let the kids do that but when they have friends over that bring tablets or other stuff we let them participate and play too. I tell them if they get broken it's on them so they really ought to put them up. They usually do.

As for phones, our 10 year old hasn't earned one yet. She was told when she turned 10 we'd talk about it. We did, she can't take care of a living animal without being told then she sure isn't able to take care of a phone yet.

Daughter is 13, plenty of activities (four dance classes a week, dance rehearsals many weeks, Girl Scouts, afterschool clubs, etc.) and no phone at all. I drive her to and from things. Her buddies in dance and at school call parents to say "I'm ready to leave now" but I don't quite get why -- don't the parents know the end times of events? None of my kid's activities have moveable end times or run very late and they certainly don't end early. None of these is an activity where the kids are walking to somewhere else to wait, or catching a public bus or otherwise leaving where they need to stay for pickup, and the dance studio and school have phones and staffers there in the office if there's a real need to call urgently....

When friends come over wtih gadgets (and I know which friends have them and are likely to want to play on them when here) I will let them for a short time, but NO live stuff like FaceTime or Skype, and I have had to tell one friend, nope, you can't video yourselves being goofy and post it on YouTube, period. After that request (which the girl nicely agreed to, immediately) I just say, hey, gadgets stay put away. I try to make sure I can offer them lots to do since we have tons of craft stuff they can use, and my own kid has known since a very young age that visits are for visiting, not for vegging out in front of a screen. I think you are right and agree that next time you can just say no gadgets. At SEVEN kids have zero business spending a play date on electronics.

My kids have iPods, but no phones. I encouraged them to get facetime so they can chat with their friends without tying up my landline. They have restrictions as to how much screen time they get, and they need my approval to buy apps. We generally keep busy enough that too much screen time isn't possible anyway. They often bring their iPods on sleepovers, and their friends do the same when they come here. They won't be getting phones until they have jobs and can afford the monthly payments. As for online safety, I teach my kids what is and isn't safe and they learn about internet safety at school. I do check up on what they are doing from time to time, but I also trust that my kids will do the right thing (most of the time, anyway). I recently took an internet safety class for parents, and they said that rather than use a filter for the net, teach your kids to be their own filter.

My dd has an iPod. We got it for her last year for her 11th bday. We have a lot of restrictions, and I carefully monitor her usage.

Many of her friends have now graduated to the iPhone, but we're not ready for that yet. She is not at the point where I am dropping her off alone, and so I don't feel she needs one yet.

Children model their parents. The see their parents on the cell at dinner, in restaurants, and even while driving. ,

My dd has a smart phone...we put it on "Airplane Mode" when her friends are over (that blocks all calls and internet). That way they can use it to make movies with the movie app, but they can't go online. When friends aren't over, she usually uses the computer in a common area...I can see what she's looking at. She does go on youtube and watches videos about braiding hair, making bracelets with a rainbow loom, etc. There's plenty of age appropriate stuff online...
It's just like TV...you have to monitor what they watch.

Okay:
1) Kids no matter what age, may have these gadgets. For whatever reason the parents decided this.
2) That does not mean, your kid or you, has to, too.
3) If a kid wants something "because everybody has one!" type attitude, then, before they are even of this age, they should have been taught about how... that is not a reason. To have something. Or do something. They ideally should be taught, before this age, how to discern... things/situations and what not.
So that,
4) they can have their own minds and discern situations, with you. The parent. Openly. And know that things are "discussed."
5) Not all kids are like that in the example you gave.
I work at a school. Too.
I also have 2 kids that are 7 and 11.
Since Toddlerhood, I just taught them to have their own minds and just because other kids are doing things, does not mean you have to, too.
And if other kids are having things or doing things, their parents may be letting them, or the parents don't even know.
But that is not, always, best. Or right. Or appropriate.
And we have always taught them about technology. And at school, they are taught that too.

i'm clearly behind the times, and i have read carefully and think i understand why modern parents do allow so many gadgets that seem over the top to me.
but surely it's not being a fuddy-duddy to put some restrictions on them, both internet access, and how much they can be used.
surely.
khairete
S.

My 8 year old doesn't have a phone. She doesn't need one either, but that's because she is always with a well-trusted adult who has a phone. When she reaches the age that she could potentially go somewhere by herself, we'll get her a basic phone.
That said, I'm not opposed to kids having smartphones ig their parents believe they should have them. Mine borrows mine to Facetime friends & family or to use various educational apps.
As a teacher, I feel like we've become so afraid of the online predator that we forget about the dangerous people we interact with in person. right here in Maryland, two teenage girls recently sexually abused a 16 year old boy who believed they were his friends.
Another Mama just asked about confiscating phones from kids at social gatherings like sleepovers. I think this is a great idea! I attended a wedding recently where the bride and groom asked that everyone put their phones in baskets before the ceremony. Some diehards refused. They gave everyone who gave up their phone a disposable camera to take pictures during the ceremony. When we got our phones back, they each had an iTunes gift card taped to them as a thank you. Why not ask the kids who come to your house to socialize to give you their phones and then return them with a candy bar or other treat attached. Or use the phones as "raffle tickets" for a $10 iTunes card.