Teaching Your Toddler to Be a Good Sport.

Very normal for her age. But you can help by leading by example and continueing to put her in these types of situations so she gets practice.

One thing you could do is use words so that she see's you understand. I used to say to my kids, - change the words around as you need - "Oh my gosh, you are really upset, aren't you?" "That was hard not getting all the butterflies, wasn't it?" - Here you've stopped her in her tracks and she's thinking, "My parents understand how I feel!!" Very cool thing for a toddler by the way.. Then just keep the dialogue, short, sweet and simple - "I know it's hard but maybe next time you can get more butterflies, are you ready to play again?" etc...

Don't worry about it and move on, punishing, drawing too much attention, etc.. won't help because she's just not there yet.

This is a tricky age. My three year old is having a hard time with it as well. In his situation, it's that he doesn't get to have the soccer ball ALL the time and that people other than him get to run and kick too. It's going to take some time and we're currently working on it.

With our daughter who's now six, we led by example. For instance, we'd be shooting a nerf ball into the little tykes' basketball hoop. Some times Mommy would make a basket (yay! we'd all say) Some times Mommy would airball (boo! we'd all say - myself included along with the overacting thumbs down) As long as she saw that I wasn't too upset about it, and even a little amused by my shortfall, little by little she got the message that it's not the end of the world. Then we'd react the same way with her performance. She'd get the 'boos' along with the 'yays'.

It sounds like you've got a perfect attitude about it and that it's just going to take some time.

My daughter is not totally okay with losing. She is human. She still wants to win and succeed and be good at things. I just have to keep reminding her and my son that sometimes you win and sometimes you lose and, golly jeepers, wasn't that a fun game of basketball?

Nope, I think it's just a maturation thing. DS could not play Candyland when he was 3 - way too much chance of a meltdown - he wasn't a good winner either. At 5 he can play games with his peers and does a fairly good job with us. It does help to play 'teams' .

I think what you and your hubby did was excellent. I also have worked hard at giving my kiddos lots of practice at winning and losing by playing a lot of games with them - even if it just me and them.
This repetition, or practicing being a good winner/loser and me being able to model appropriate behavior has helped my boys be good sports.
It also helps that both my husband and I are athletic and participate in group sports where our children have seen us win and lose and how to appropriately act either way:)

Nope, except just keep playing games with her and showing her that sometimes you don't win all the time. Show her how to properly handle losing. She will catch on in time.

my daughter does pageants and she is 4 and old enough to understand when she doesnt win her age group. her best little friend beat her this last time and she cried on stage. i was embarrassed but there was nothing i could do. when we got off stage i took her aside and told her that it was ok to be upset but it wasnt our turn to win and that we should be happy for our friends that win. so we took the girls to get a treat and they were fine.

its just hard for them to do things as easy as older kids. they get easily frustrated and its normal. just reassure her to keep trying her best and that your proud of her for being a good player :) also hugs work great too lol

Additionally:
Well she is 3 and this is a hard age.
They don't even have fully developed impulse-control yet nor are their emotions fully developed.

Play games with her at home.
She will learn, gradually.
It takes time. More than once.
Practice.

Also, if you or Hubby "lose" a game... then you both model your reactions to it. So she 'sees' how others react, to games etc.

Concentrate on it being "fun" and feeling happy/excited about just playing a game.
Not the 'quantity' of things won.

Sounds like you handled it well; just keep up the discussions. This is one of those issues that isn't solved by one conversation and you're done. You will have many "teaching moments" in the future; and as always, the lessons with the biggest impact are those that are taught by example.

3 year olds haven't developed empathy yet. Keep leading by example and she'll be good to go when she hits that developmental stage.