Teachers

I have put two sons through high school and experienced this problem with one of them. He said he didn't like the teacher for various reasons but we explained to him that it didn't matter, he still had to do his best in the class and wait it out. Sometimes kids will want to switch classes because they don't like a teacher, it isn't a good idea for that reason alone. We all know from experience that we have to work and deal with people we may not like or get along with but will have no choice in the matter. It's a good life lesson to teach her to adjust to these situations or better yet address the reason why she doesn't like the teacher and try to change that. Learning to forge good relationships is the hardest but wisest thing we will ever do.

S.

I wish I had an answer for you. I just wanted you to know that my son seems to do the same thing. My son is a senior now and I'm worried about college. I hope you get a lot of helpful answers that may benefit me as well. Good luck.

I think this is a good life lesson for her to learn that sometimes you just have to deal with people you dislike - later in life it might be a co-worker, a boss, an in-law, etc. I would be honest with her and tell her that she just needs to get through this and do the best she can - don't let other people hold her back or prevent her from doing the best she can.

Good luck!

I have a son in this same age range and my conversation goes like this....you cannot change the teacher you can control your ability to learn in the class. Liking or disliking the teacher is irrevelvant you still have to do the best you can. Unfortunately there will always be ppl we don't like we can control only our own behaviors in dealing with them to make ourselves the best we can be. If I recognize the problem early on I will ask why and then continue to pursue it with him as the year progresses. This year in 7th we have two teachers that he didn't like when I asked why he gave me a reason one he felt the teacher said something in appropriate, we talked alot about forgiving the teacher and to let me know if it happened again...it hasn't(teachers make mistakes too). The other teacher he has really focused on "trying".....and we are doing excellent in both classes but I ask all the time how is this class or that one to be sure we are focused.

It is also her learning style the teachers she likes the most appeal to her learning style and therefore she relates to them well. The ones she doesn't like interestingly appeal to someone elses styles and so it might be someone elses favorite teacher and good for her to experience alternative styles of teaching. Maybe you and your daughter work together to identify her style of learning and then she has that knowledge to move forward with into high school. She could even use the knowledge to be more successful in other classes with teachers she does not like as much.

That is tough. I have a daughter in the 7th grade now that had a problem with a teacher in the 6th grade. I had to ride it out. I tried to explain to her that the teacher is there to do her job and you are there to be a student. Even though she did not like her, AT ALL, I boosted her confidance that she would only have her for a few more months. She would not have to see her the rest of her high school years. It is tough, I know. Her grades dropped due to her hatred towards this teacher, at least your daugher is still getting good grades. Trying to make her realize there is a light at the end of the tunnel is all I can give. Now, my daughter just tells me that she is so glad she does not have that teacher this year!

Is she flunking the class with the disliked teacher? If not maybe it's just she doesn't like the teacher. Otherwise, Sylvan might be a way to emphasize the class and material. If she's doing fine in the class with A's or a B, I don't see the problem. She'll be away from the teacher in HS anyway.
Just don't set so high a standard that she stresses out to achieve your standards. It's good to be successful and smart, but more importantly to be loved anyway, even if she was average.

If she is going to be in high school next year, I'm assuming she won't have to deal with that teacher? I've always told my kids that they will not always have teachers they like but they won't have them forever and they still have to do the work and be respectful. I let them vent to me about their hard day and just remind them that tough teachers only help them learn how to deal with tough situations. It was harder when they were younger but now they are old enough to understand how to deal with a teacher they don't like. Good luck!

T., This is a tough one, You want to teach your daughter, she will not always like her teachers, (and later in life, maybe her bosses!) But, the work still needs to be done! Time for a long talk, first with your daughter, what doesn't she like in the teacher, how can she "learn" from this teacher?
Next, go to the teacher, talk about your daughters learning troubles and how can you work TOGETHER to help your daughter. If the trouble continues, have your daughter change teachers,
(if possible) Good luck. Been there, wish I would have switched my son out! K.

What do you know about this teacher? Can they actually teach? Your daughter may not like her becasue she is not a good teacher, or she may be inappropiate in class. Are allof the students doing badly in this class or just her? Find out specifics as to why she doesn't like her. Does the teacher answer questions or make the student feel bad for asking? Has the teacher made your daughter feel bad? Are her grades lower because she doesn't understand the work or was it one project/unit that brought her grade down? It sounds like there is more going on that needs to be figured out before you proceed. Your daughter might need some help in figuring out what is her responsibilities in this situation, and what is out of her control. Sometimes just knowing that your parents are willing to help can give her the motivation to take it a step higher.

What about a study buddy? Earlier in the year she might have been able to transfer out of the class. Now, unfortunately, she gets to learn the lesson that we won't like all of our teachers, but we still have to respect and learn from them

S.

Good luck!

Hi T. W

As a High School teacher (and Grandmother)remind your daughter that I cannot please every student. Ask her what would happen if I didn't work for my students who I did not like or who were mean to me? The outcome of our lives depend upon the actions we take or ignore regardless of our circumstances. Tell her there were plenty of weird professors in college I didn't like, but I knew I wanted to meet my goals so I did everything they asked of me. As parents or grandparents we explain, suggest and hopefully pray, but the rest is up to your daughter. I remind my students that they may have bosses they don't like, but it's wonderful to be independent and pay our own bills. Getting along with everyone, regardless of what we really think, is part of life!!

I understand your question. I think you need to get into why she doesn't like the teacher. For example: She may not like teachers who are disorganized. Their disorganization may have something to do with her lower marks. A solution maybe to ask more questions about the schedule/ organization items, either of a friend or the teacher.

She may also have trouble understanding the teachers directions, again she may need to ask more questions.

But getting into the "Why" might help find the answer.