Stopping Child from Blurting Secret

Sounds ok to gently place a hand over mouth over for a few seconds. Unless it totally freaks out that particular child, in which case maybe one finger across child's lips like shhh!

Ah, those little cuties. No big deal, especially if it's just a momentary movement.

May I suggest that you continue to use the word "surprise" instead of "secret"? We explained to our children that surprises are things we keep quiet about until the special day, when everyone knows about it. And surprises were always things they could tell one of your parents about. The emphasis here is on never keeping a secret from your parents, for child protection reasons.

All my best and have a great surprise for someone. I won't tell!

Don't tell them the secret in the first place!

Only way to prevent a child from blurting a secret is not to tell them.

I *HATE* it when people put their hands on my face, so I don't do it to my kids, but that's just me.

I think that would be the most common knee jerk reaction, cup their mouth and say "Shhhhh! It's a secret." That's how to teach them what secrets are in the first place I would suppose. You have to follow up later and explain of course.

If you didn't tell your child and it was a secret from somewhere else, then I don't see why you should stop it at all. If you don't want your own secrets about anything shared- talk, without your child present. Any other adult who said something in front of your child should use some common sense.Children don't edit for a very long time.

I feel just fine about it. As long as you are not cutting off your child's air supply, it won't hurt them!

My DD and I actually play a game that involves covering each other's mouths. :)

Um, I really don't feel strongly about the hand over the mouth thing - I don't have a problem with it nor have I done it.

I haven't had to do it as I realize kids blurt things out - some of the most favorite stories of my parents when they were little or me when I was little, etc. was telling some sort of secret...........so - lesson learned from that is, "If you don't want your secret told, don't tell a small child."

I like Rose K's differentiation between 'secret' and 'surprise'... this is a very thoughtful suggestion. Thanks, Rose!

I think that as long as we do this gently, in a loving way and let our child know we aren't upset with them, covering their mouth for just a second is fine. It IS hard when they are excited and want to let the cat out of the bag, isn't it?

there is a difference between a secret and a surprise.

You don't say how old your child is - so if they are younger - yes. Fine. I would most likely get down to their level and tell them - shhh!!! it's a SURPRISE!!!

However, they need to know the difference between a "secret" and a SURPRISE!!

in my opinion, though, there shouldn't be "secrets" because they can hurt...

A friend of mine made up a code word to blurt out. She and her children decided on a word (theirs was "Banana"). Whenever they were out and one of them came close to blurting out something they shouldn't, she'd blurt out "BANANA!" Not only was it not expected, it would often cause the group to crack up laughing.... :D

Explain what a surprise is and how you may NOT talk about it. I know that doesn't always work, when my dd was young, she would say "I'm not allowed to talk about the party" and of course would ruin it.

Tough situation....kids don't get it! The more you tell them not to do something, the more it's on their mind.

My exact first thought was: NEVER teach a child it is ok to keep "secrets". We have always used "surprise" and explained that it will be told/revealed soon, but waiting makes it more fun and exciting.
Secrets are things that are never told, and we don't do that. My children (when they are very small especially) should not have secrets.
Even mother's day or father's day things.... they are a "surprise" for the other parent, but ONE parent knows. :)

As for the hand over the mouth... meh. It isn't MY preference (I put one finger over their lips---like the "shhh" style finger), but I don't really see a problem with it.

Don't kids say the darndest things!? Sometimes you just want to crawl in a hole, the things that come out of their mouths.

Sometimes they know things they know and there's nothing to be done about it. If it's a matter of not talking in front of them, you should try to remember the old saying "little pitchers have big ears" so that they don't have that particular thing to divulge. And there's always the "rolling of the eyes" and saying to the person "I'm sorry about that - he is confused."

Personally, I don't have a problem with putting your hand over his mouth.

Dawn