Sticking to Your Plan

I'm pretty good at it, but there are other people in my house. Sometimes what's convenient for me, isn't for them. I may have a great plan, but it gets derailed because I didn't take my husbands agenda into consideration. For instance, I took a whole day off work and had a whole list of things to get done. He tells me that morning he has a big drs appt that day and really wanted me to go with him and how grateful he was that i took the day off to go with him. So, what's a girl to do. I went to the dr with my man and threw my plans out the window.

Just depends.. If I really WANT to do something, I will change my plan. If I want to do it, but HAVE to finish working, running errands, etc.. sometimes, I cannot..

But I am like a tree, I can bend and bounce back from some changes.. I just have to have the time, drive and energy..

I do not just stick to a plan to prove some point.. I want my daughter to learn that plans can change, but be prepared to make up whatever you missed..

I guess I'm not seeing the point here. To me there is a fine line b/w "sticking to your plan" and being "rigid". I have a list of things every day that need to get done, but that list is reasonable and allows for flexibility. So yes, I get done what I need to get done but I don't allow that rigidity (or stubborness) to get in the way of seeing a friend.

What do you need to get done today that can't be flexed? Doctors appointments or are these just errands? In this case, I probably would have suggested that I could pick my daughter up early IF the friend was able to take her to do something for a while- meaning I would drop her off and come back a few hours later.

If I were on the receiving end of this conversation I would be a little miffed. This isn't someone your daughter gets to see every day and it sounds like your daughter is pretty special to this person. If you blew off your visiting friend to grocery shop... well, your choice but I probably would have seen this as a reason to "flex" my plan.

Yes. And I have no problem telling anyone we cant meet at this time or I need to be home by this time to accomadate naptimes. Most people are understanding but a few cant seem to understand that breaking a routine is hard on little kids ( and their parents) I say stay firm with your friend, maybe suggest a late afternoon or early evening time to get together

It's BECOME easy, but it wasn't always.

Especially being a SAHP, people often assume you have NO schedule, or that your schedule isn't "as important" as, say, someone at a paying job. Then, when I became a homeschooler, it became even worse. After a year of it I finally blew my top. After 2 years homeschooling I finally did a 'major gripe/rant' See this Q and the phenomenal response http://www.mamapedia.com/questions/17804342602795974657

A couple years ago was the WORST. We were new to homeschooling (after doing montessori preschool, and public K) and so called friends kept trying to use me as free babysitting. Or even paid babysitting. School breaks were actually ridiculous. Sorry, WE still have school. Or kiddo was at camp and that was/is my time to rock the 'self care', but others felt that "since I wasn't doing anything"... Nope. Huh-uh. Sorry!

If I take a day off THESE days, it's intentional. Just like someone taking a day off work (and I may be a stay at home homeschooling mom NOW, but I've worked paying jobs for more than half my life), I'll take a day or 3 off. For playdates (kid or adult), appointments, etc. But if I DIDN'T stand firm? I'd never get anything done. i'd get burned out, and stressed out, and behind.

Which I know, because I didn't always stick to my plans. And I do now. Which is heaven.

I used to bend over backwards to make things happen with people. Drive all over the place, take off of work, rip and run. I'm still flexible but only if I can still take care of my needs first. It took some severe stress for me to make this change but I think sticking to my plans is for the better.

I feel a little bad at times because I am very blunt with people (when I need to be) that I will not do something that is going to result in my kids being confused about why something was okay under certain circumstances and not okay under other circumstances. So I guess in a way it is "my schedule" and that is why I am inclined to stick to it but my siblings live anywhere from an hour and a half to a whole day's drive away from us. My sister in particular is really bad thinking it means nothing for us to drive an hour and a half to get there and an hour and a half back and in the middle we are there just to watch a TV show with her that we could have watched at our house and gotten in some quality activity and running around time for the kids.