Single Parents - Fort Worth,TX

How sad for your little girl.

Do not try to tell her why her situation is not bad. Instead, when she is sad about it, mirror her emotions, telling her that it is sad that she doesn't get to see her father. And don't follow that statement with a "but." (Don't call him her "dad", the word "dad" has to be earned. He's only a father.) Her emotions need to be validated. Everyone needs to have their feelings validated. Also, very important - be sure to stress that it has NOTHING to do with her. Tell her some people are unable to be good parents, or however you want to explain his crappy, selfish, immature, uncaring behavior.

I learned the mirroring technique from a speaker at my kids' school many years ago. Having emotions mirrored is a strong human need. If you tell people why they should NOT feel the way they do, it makes their feelings stronger.

Would your other Children's father be willing to father her too. It is heart breaking to be unwanted.

My son had a similar experience. I have taught him about God being his father. He knows he can talk with God anytime and is learning principles and values to live by. He's a great kid but sill a kid. He goes through stuff but knowing God the way he does helps.

Psalm 139 is where we started. God wants us all to see and know him as a loving father and so much more.

I pray this helps, K.

awe, that is sad that her dad doesnt want to see her.
My son joined a counseling group at school. it helped him realize that his situation could be worse. and it helped him to have other kids to talk to and the counselor to help them deal with their feelings.

is there a big brother organization near you if so try it its like a susbstitute daddy. She goes to her big brother when the others go with daddy. Or if you have a close male friend they usually will step in if they are good dads. just ask the worse they can do is say no.

I agree with Page, and I was also going to suggest the Big Sister program, or some kind of mentoring program where she would get to have a special relationship of her own. Not the same thing, but it would make her feel like someone cares, and maybe stress to her that it's even better when someone cares simply because they want to, not because they are forced to.