"Seeking Moms for Suggestions on Disipline"

Dear A., I can understand why you are at a loss with your daughter. It can be so frustrating when they push and push and push. One tactic I've found helpful, though it's very simple, is when they go through phases of defiance, do not give them choices. Your daughter (and my sons) need to learn to accept what parents expect of them. Until they can respect our authority, and trust that we know what is best for them, they cannot be given the responsibility of making their own choices. One time I remember was with breakfast. My older son refused everything. We went through about a week (a tough week) where we gave him no choice, and it really helped him cooperate and enjoy having choices later on. Sometimes without meaning too, we are expecting too much of our young kids, and since they can't handle the responsibility of making even these simple choices, they act out with power struggles.

maybe she thinks by doing something wrong its looking for attention..sounds to me lik shes trying to get somekind of attention but she doesnt know how to do it positivly?? im trying to make sense lol have you considered counseling for her? my 8 yo old just started counceling for emotional problems that stem from her "mother"....

Just a quick comment. I have a Nephew with ADD. They didn't find out until he was 7 and he showed alot of the same symptoms as you say your little girl is showing.
Does she have a hard time sitting still at dinner? Or maintaining eye contact during discipline? You might want to talk to your pediatrician about this. Hope my suggestion helps. Hope everything turns out okay.

Hi A.,
I have your same issue, only years later. My 2 girls are 9&12. My 12 year old is so very sweet and kind.... And I have NEVER heard a negative word on her behavior EVER!!! My 9 year old is a nice girl, good student, talented dancer. However, she has been rude, fresh , and down-right mean to her sisters and to others @ times. I think set the tone (as far as her being allowed to act badly) because she is the baby. She gets into trouble @ school as well @ home. I will tell you that she does NOT misbehave @ dance , where she has been for the past 5 years. The difference, the dance director will not tolerate it from her so, she doesn't even go there. I do punish my little one by putting her in her room and by taking away the things she loves like going to a friends house, etc. This works IF you stick to it which I have learned FINALLY ! All I can say and I guess what my point is is that you have the opportunity to set the tone and the rules now (while they are still so very young) and it will be less stresss later on. Just follow through, you didn't meantion a spouse or partner so , IF there is one, they need to be on board ,as well.Good Luck, stay stong, stick to your guns!!!
D. R.