Seeking Help on Transitioning My Son from My Room to His Own Seperate Room....

Highly recommend the book Healthy sleep, happy children which is full of wonderful advice tried and tested by this paediatrician and his families. Best of luck!

everyone is different, but i did the co-sleeping thing too, and guess what? my 7year old, my three year old, and myself all sleep in one bed, my husband in another.... lately they have been comfortable just with themselves, but only really recently. it is a hard transition, and who can blame the kid? sleeping next to a warm body is just more comforting. as a single mom, i bet you are ready for your space at the end of the day... good news is, your little one loves you!!

Well, I can tell you what worked for us. I have a 3 year old daughter and a 4 year old son. Bedtime used to be a nightmare for us. Our kids had also slept in our bed for a long time until we could just no longer all fit. Here's what we have done and it's still working great!

Start a bedtime routine at or around the same time each night. Ours is usually around 8pm. The kids go get dressed in their PJ's and brush their teeth. I get each child a sippy cup of chocolate milk (that they only get to drink during the Bible story), then I set each child next to me in the recliner. We read one bedtime story each night. Right now we are reading "My Good Night Bible". It has lots of short stories. There is even a cute little bedtime rhyme and song we say and sing with our kids to start the bedtime process each night. There are cute illustrations, a little prayer to go along with the story, and it takes less than 5 minutes to go thru. Anyway, after we read the story and say the prayer, We let each child pick out a book and we head to their beds. I take one child and my husband takes the other. We read another short story to them in bed, then we sing them a lullaby or song or two. Then we stay for about 5 minutes or so just laying there with them scratching their backs or something, then we are done. When we first started, the kids got out of bed a few times, but we put them right back in each time and kissed them goodnight. After about a week or two, they had the whole routine down.

Now, we also do one more thing. We let each of our kids have a "special night" once a week where they get to sleep in our beds. My son picked Friday's and my daughter picked Saturday's. On these nights, the bedtime routine is still the same except they head off to our bed instead. I think it has helped them thru the whole process without cutting them off cold turkey. They love it! We have a calendar on the wall and we have highlighted their "special nights" in different colors. We cross off each day and they just get so excited each time their "special night" approaches.

Anyway, you don't have to do the whole "special night" thing, but I'd definitely give the bedtime routine a try.

Hi there....
No worries, I know how hard it is. I am a single mom as well and battled the same issue (living with parents) and so on. It wasnt until I just absolutely put my foot down when she was SIX that she started sleeping in her own bed. I tried and gave up numerous times, but I can guarentee you that it gets harder the older they get. I bought her a special new grown up bed and eventually she just got used to it. There are still times now (almost a year later) that she still asks to sleep with me. When she is sick or on a rare special occasion I will oblige. Otherwise I remind her that she is a big girl and all of the other girls in her class are at home in their own beds. This has finally made a difference.
I know what its like adn I know how hard it is on you as well. Truthfully, I couldn't wait for her to sleep in her own bed, but at times, I really miss it too!! It's just the best thing for her, developmentally. And for me too!! Best of luck! Say some prayers and BE STRONG. He will cry, trust me. As will you!! But just know that he's not in any pain, there is nothing wrong with what you're doing and this will be the best thing for you both once you get through the rough part!!

My best
C.

This is normal. When he wakes up, walk him back to his room. You may need to lay on the floor near him until he falls asleep, then slowly sneak out. It may take 30 minutes or so. This may take up to a week or two. Each time lay further away from him, even right outside the door. Eventually, he will get the hang of it and sleep through the night. good luck, changing bad habits takes much work. It is always easy to take the easy way out and let him crawl in your bed.

Hi N.,

my son slept with me until he was about 2, and then we started telling him that he was so big now that he would get his very own room (we made it sound really special). We took him to Ikea and he got to pick out some little pieces of furniture and decorations, so he was really excited about it. It was a bit difficult to get him used to the idea of sleeping there, but it works now. I go to bed with him now (read a book then stay until he falls asleep. But falling asleep alone might take a while, I think.

Good luck!
G.

Hi!
I have three kids and i have to admit they all used to sleep in my bed. I recently (3 wks ago) moved my youngest out of our bed who is 4 yrs old. I did what one of the other moms suggested to you. I bought her a new bed and let her pick out new bedding and a new stuffed animal to sleep with. She loved it! We also told everyone...grandmas, uncles and aunts...all about her new bed and how she is a BIG girl. She loved to tell everyone she had a new bed. That might work too!

Good luck!

S.

hi N.--
i hope people aren't giving you a lot of static about co-sleeping with your son. we have done this with our 2 kids and they are very secure, very good sleepers. our son, who is almost 5, stopped sleeping with us a little over a year ago (so he was 3 when he moved to his own room). our daughter is almost 3 and has been sleeping in her own room for about 6 months. she almost always ends up in our bed by morning, but some nights we don't see her at all. i read to the kids in my bed every night, and then my husband puts them to bed. my daughter asks to go to her room if she gets sleepy before we are done reading.

what worked for us was having each child choose his/her own bed & bedding. that way, they were both sooo excited about their rooms. they are allowed to have as many stuffed animals as they want. my son likes to read to himself for a bit before turning off his light. this never lasts more than about 15 minutes before he is sound asleep. my daughter likes to be rocked and sung to before she will go to sleep.

it takes some patience. don't expect that your son will be in his own bed all night immediately. anticipate that it will take maybe a few months before he is in there permanently. don't give up but don't fuss at him either. allow it to be a gentle, loving transition.

good luck!

We had the same issue with my stepdaughter. Her mother lets her sleep in bed with her and always has, so when she would come to our house, she would expect to sleep with us or have daddy sleep with her. It took us about 6 months of being firm and consistent with her that the rules at daddy's house are different and she has her own room and her own bed to sleep in, for her to stop crying and asking every night for someone to sleep with her.

Now, bedtime is no issue at all, i tell her its bedtime, she goes in, we read a book and she's out. Her mother, still can't get her out of her bed.

I have 4 kids who range from 7-3 . What we do is be active with them all day . Tire them out ! Don't let them take any naps and then when they go to bed we put a movie on for them to watch in their beds until they fall a sleep which is usually not long . Maybe try a favorite movie ! Make sure you have a night light and he has his stuffed animal or blanket to sleep with . Good Luck !