Seeking Advise on How to Rid Namecalling

Trying reminding your son that there is NO such thing as a looser when someone is practing to become their best!

I tell my children a looser is "someone who never tries!"

Teaching you son to respond in positive manner when someone is negitive will take him far in life.

Sometime giving him the rights words to respond will help them to learn how to find the right words later.

Like helping him to respond to the boys "I am learning how to play; today I may not be good , but one day I'll be Great!"

Martial Arts. I was a picked on kiddo and my parents always told me to never strike the first blow but if someone hit me I was free to fight back. They even had me learn the sticks and stones phrase. Honestly though I was very timid and easily wounded by namecalling. I started taking kickboxing and can't tell you how much confidence that gave me. I was able to stand up for myself because I knew I could back it up. I never did get into a physical fight, but I was a stronger more confident kiddo. They teach you in martial arts to respect your knew found skill and not to use it on others.

I plan on teaching my three year old kickboxing and have already taught my teens. The older girls have never been in a fight at school and have confidence in themselves.

Simon's Hook; A Story About Teases and Put-downs
by Karen Gedig Burnett has great ideas. It's better for a slightly older child, but your son will benefit from you reading it to him and then role-playing the strategies with him. http://www.amazon.com/Simons-Story-About-Teases-Put-downs...

I know it's hard for your son to ignore the boy who is calling names since they are on a team together but I would
suggest just that. to ignore the kid and if he can walk away

explain to your son and reassure him that he is not a loser, that what his team mate is doing is mean and nasty and probably isn't sure of himself. anyways I hope this works. good luck

J.,
I work with the public, and I find that the best thing to do is just walk away at times. It usually seems that if you try to make them see differently they will come back and pick on you more and more, because you did react, and that is exactly what they wanted.
W.

I remember my Dad asking me, "if they call you Stupid and you answer them... doesn't that make you stupid?" Then he would explain...

There are 3 parts to this:

1. Just because they called you that... it doesn't make it who you are.

2. If you respond you are proving them right.

3. It's not your name. :-)

In other words, my dad was instilling confidence in knowing who I am and not believing someone else's interpretation of me. He put it in a question form so that I would think about it, so next time someone called me a poopoo head or something, it really didn't affect me because I realized that is not who I am.

Of course we aren't built the same way, but show him that his inner confidence is what should drive him and that you think he is the BEST no matter what others may say!!

P.S. My dad also taught us (and this was more in our teenage years) to, "Turn the other cheek, but when you run out of cheeks... fight back!" :-) I love that quote!

I think you did a great job by talking to both boys, and involving the coach, and I think his idea to take away batting practice was great too!

In regards to your son not standing up for himself... it's harsh, but maybe he didn't have a comeback because he thinks himself -or at least thought at the time- a loser? Perhaps he dropped a ball or something... and felt like he had let people down... because he already believed in what the kid said, he had nothing to stand on when it came to standing up for himself.

Perhaps a little more practice with you or dad, and he will be able to notice his own improvement, and be more confident of himself on and off the field... If baseball doesn't seem to be his game, perhaps try another activity, such as soccer, swimming, martial arts or even dance/gymnastics.

Best of luck, and who knows? That boy who called him a loser might be his best friend in a couple of months, so it will all be water under the bridge...