Seeking Advice on Non Stop Crying 8 Month Old I Babysit

Updated on August 27, 2008
R.J. asks from Las Vegas, NV
4 answers

HELP! I just started watching a 8 month old a couple days ago and already I'm ready to throw in the towel. But, I honestly need the money too. Here's the thing; he cries cries cries UNLESS he's being held!! I have a little boy of my own so of course I can't nor honestly want to. I interact with both of them on the floor but if I'm not holding the 8 month old its a complete nightmare playtime for everyone. My husband has now found ways to not come home until the 8 month old has gone home. I'm soo worn out and I guess a bit irritated by the end of the day that I just want to be left alone. Well, having a little one of my own also thats not logical. I was told by the mom that the older siblings got the little one spoiled but there has got to be a way that he's happy WITHOUT being held.

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So What Happened?

Well today is another day and so far he's had a couple screaming fits but I just softly talked to him and told him that he was alright. Right now he's in the jumparoo whinning but not screaming. His brother keeps going up to him from time to time to tell him he's alright so I think that helps too. I did get him to take a nap this mroning but unfortunately he was laying with me on the couch but I was not holding him. Slowly I will move him into the playpen but don't want to move too quickly through this transition. I'll keep everyone updated. Thanks for all your help and advice. Well, he's screaming mad right now but I am in the same room so he can see me.

More Answers

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N.D.

answers from Reno on

I agree about the seperation thing, all my kids went thru it at about the same age. Dont throw in the towel just yet! Give this boys some time to adjust to both you and all his changes. I would try to not hold him everytiem he cries though, maybe some kind of reassurance with out holding. Sit with him on the floor so he learns that you will be there when he needs you, but you are not holding him all the time. Pray that the adjustment period is fast and I am sure all will be better soon. Also even if a child is spoiled at home at his age he will quickly learn that what happens at home is NOT the same as what happens outside of home. All three of my kids (9,4,3) behave differently everyplace else then they do at home, they just learn that there are different rules at different places and they are okay with that as soon as they learn those rules. Hang in there!!

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

Hi R., If having this baby there keeps your husband from coming home, quit with this child, and get another one, 8 months is to big to hold all day. not only that but depending on the age of your little one if he sees this baby get his way by crying, your son may start doing it, I run a home daycare and I have this all too often, not with my kids, their grown, but other kids in my daycare. Honestly you can't enjoy this time with your child, with one crying all the time? I would give the mom notice, and tell her why. If he is held on the time at home, that's all he knows, it might change after he adjusts being with you, but the fact that your husband waits for the baby to leave before her comes, would be all I would need to let this baby go. There's a lot of working parents out there, you'll get another child, what area are you in, and how old is your son? J. L.

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M.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

Just hang in there. As a provider i have noticed at or around age 8 months, some boys seem to go through a seperation anxiety. Even though they have been with me since 6 weeks. I have 6 boys and 4 have gone through it. You just have to hang in there, give them reassurance and TLC and try not to hold them more than normal. The more you hold them the longer the transition. Remember he needs to feel he is okay and holding him more he will not learn as fast. It lasts about 3 weeks. It may be longer for you since this is all new to him he is going through double seperation anxiety.

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D.B.

answers from San Diego on

It sounds like he might be scared! He is probably getting used to you, at this age he might be having some separation anxiety and needing some major TLC! Try and spend some quality time with him and then little by little show him some different toys or things to look at and draw his attention to- a mirror, looking at pictures on the walls, playing peek-boo or singing silly songs can go a long way at this way to distract and entertain. Once he is calm do you have an exersaucer for him? My son loved that if he isn't really into crawling yet. Take him outside to look at the trees blowing and leaves and flowers, this is a great distraction too. If possible, get a double stroller and take them for a walk- when my son is fussy, I will take him for 2 or 3 walks a day as needed, he loves the wind and the trees and the stuff to look at. Don't give up, just try some new things. Of course this is assuming he isn't hungry or tired. Make sure he is full and that he isn't over tired. At 8 months he shouldn't go more then 3 hours or so without a nap. he also should be getting some babyfood, rice cereal and water/and or juice....just some thoughts----- good luck-

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