Crying When She Sees Me

hey my daughter use to do that to my grandma told me when she is playing and starts to do that to show a toy and get her occupied with it an dshe would stop crying ,or to sit down and and do the same thing it was because i was standing and every time i was standing she thought i should be holding her
S. g

Probably just a phase, but I would recommend directing her attention to something else in the room that might fascinate her and discourage this behavior. You can direct her attention with your own eyes if you catch her before the melt down and make putting her down extra fun for awhile by sitting with her briefly. It won't always work, but don't give up trying.
Been there,
C. S.

That is normal behavior for a baby her age, it can be hard to deal with though, I know.

Have you thought about purchasing a sling so that she will be with you, but your hands will be free to do whatever it is that you need to do?

A good website to check out is www.wearyourbaby.com.

HTH!

hi M.,
I agree with the Dr. Sears mentality! My 6 month old is the same way and I pick her up because i feel like if my baby is crying it means she needs something and i want her to know i will always respond to her. I think because i have always done this she doesn't have loud cries...she makes a noise before the cry and i know she is wanting something and i respond. at 6 and 7 months they need a lot of holding/contact with us that is why they cry when we come in the room.

good luck, i know it is hard when we have to get something done and our little ones need to be held!!! I am getting really strong doing things around the house and holding my daughter at the same time.

Hi M.,

You may want to check out www.askdrsears.com. I love his advice. His attachment-parenting philosophies have worked beautifully on my daughter. The idea is the more secure they feel, the less these types of things will happen. She's four now, and pretty secure.
Check out this article: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/5/T051200.asp#T051201

Or his The Fussy Baby Book. Changing the behavior will probably take more effort on your part at first, but it pays off! You'll be glad you did. :-)

Check out these excerpts from the article on the page I cited above:

Up until that time parents had been led to believe that if they picked up their baby every time she cried she would never learn to settle herself and would become more demanding. Bell and Ainsworth's research showed the opposite. Babies who developed a secure attachment and had their cues responded to in a prompt and nurturing way became less clingy and demanding. More studies were done to shoot down the spoiling theory, showing that babies whose cries were not promptly responded to begin to cry more, longer, and in a more disturbing way. In one study comparing two groups of crying babies, one group of infants received an immediate, nurturant response to their cries, while the other group was left to cry-it-out. The babies whose cries were sensitively attended to cried seventy percent less. The babies in the cry-it-out group, on the other hand, did not decrease their crying. In essence, crying research has shown that babies whose cries were listened and responded to learned to "cry better"; the infants who were the product of a more restrained style of parenting learned to "cry harder." It is interesting that the studies revealed differences not only in how the babies communicated with the parents based on the response they got to their cries, but there were also differences in the mothers, too. Studies showed that mothers who gave a more restrained and less nurturant response gradually became more insensitive to their baby's cries, and this insensitivity carried over to other aspects of their parent-child relationship. Research showed that leaving baby to cry-it- out spoils the whole family.

And...

Crying isn't "good for baby's lungs." One of the most ridiculous pieces of medical folklore is the dictum: "Let baby cry, it's good for his lungs." In the late 1970's, research showed that babies who were left to cry had heart rates that reached worrisome levels, and lowered oxygen levels in their blood. When these infants' cries were soothed, their cardiovascular system rapidly returned to normal, showing how quickly babies recognize the status of well being on a physiologic level. When a baby's cries are not soothed, he remains in physiologic as well as psychological distress.

Hi M.
how is everything going.
I dont have good advice, but I can say that my daughter has done the same thing. I let her cry for 3 days and I even woud go in to my room and cry and she finlly stoped. How ever over the holidays she was with grandma and she stared it all over agian. she is now 1 1/2 and the letting her cry dose not do anything sje is only getting louder. So what I am saying is nip it in the butt know before she gets out of controll.
Always tricia

I can feel your pain, my 8 month old daughter is currently in a phase of chasing through the house to hold her constantly. Don't worry though, this is very normal developmentally. Seperation anxiety, while difficult for us as parents, is a good sign that your baby is bonded to you. When she cries when she sees you, she is just reminded of how much she misses you when you are out of sight. When babies get to this more mobile age they suddenly understand how easily you can be gone and how much they still need you. Give her a pat, caress, some reassurance or maybe a song to let her know that she is okay and that you aren't leaving. She will learn that she is okay.

i second reading up on dr sears, a 7 month old cannot be spoiled. good luck!

Please don't let your baby cry it out...

My son did exactly this same thing, and it started at about 3 months. It actually just stopped this week (13 months old). I think, depending on the situation, mine just missed me all day and wanted me to spend some time with him. He would even do it if I left the room and came back not acknowledging him. He just wanted me to say hi to him and love on him a little, and then he was fine. I didn't let him cry because I knew he just wanted some acknowlegment. In my opinion, that's not spoiling him but showing him that he's loved.

I will say that I have let my son cry in other instances where I know he was just being whiny, but I don't feel this is the case with the other. I hope this makes sense and helps.

I only briefly reviewed the responses so forgive me if someone has asked...when is this happening? at home? or just at day care? or at a neighbor's house? these are very different environments and could signal many things. Based on your posting, I am guessing you are a foreign national writing in English. This could also cause misinterpretations. I disagree that a 7 month old cannot be spoiled. All three of my children were and are to this day SPOILED! Remember you are a single mother and just as she is all you have, you are all she has. It can be scary. I know it is easier said than done but you will have to be very patient and try to ignore the crying as annoying. I ignored it to the point of bedtime. At that point, you should put in the earplugs and let her cry it out for a few days until she can settle down and sleep. That was my ONLY firm rule in my house about crying. Good luck!