Relationships Between Me and Mother in Law

Hi Em
Glad you think it is important. God Bless you and your family - and by that I mean everyone whose life you touch as well - because of your role in making your environment a peaceful and loving one.
On this particular matter, my take is that every mintute we can spend with each other is a precious memory. We want to be there as often as possible but other factors like cost and comfort must step in. I think if you were to say to your Mother-in-law straight up - "Mom we loving spending all our time with you here but I do feel that because the driving is a little hard for (husband), would you mind if we slept at the hotel and come over on mornings I think this may help him be more comfortable for the drive back" .
On the other hand "I know that she is going to be a little hurt because it is the being altogether - seeing you last thing before each one goes to bed first thing in the morning (in case of her son/grand is a little memory that is precious now)but God will guide you both. Maybe - buy a blow up bed - single or double as space permits it could be taken down every day. It could be left there just for visits.
One of my memories (can you imagine it)one day/night of a family week-end in Maryland - 21 persons in a 3-bedroom house - every sofa and makeshift bed in basement/living room - ("wherever there was room in the inn") - children/adults/seniors everyone taken care of. None of us will ever forget the fun/talks etc. being right there for each other or whoever not having to leave just yet. I am sorry to be so long but the reason I am doing this is because my eldest sister and her husband who took the head of household responsibility for a family of 12 ranging from 21 - 1 year on the death of my mother/father within one year of each other(this in her 20s, married 1 year and just having had her 1st child). They had previously lived with their daughter and that's where I stay when my family goes to visit. Recently,they decided to get an apartment in a small (senior citizen)building. She has been asking be to come over to that same 'sofa situation'. When we go we are very comfortable at my niece's (and like you are suggesting when we get up and get things together that's where go and spend all our time too, but on considering your question - it made me understnad the importance of "every moment availability. My sister makes sure she speaks to everyone of us eavery day if only to say "just wanted to know what you are doind. We are now 9 still alive. Hope this helps you make your decision and in this busy world we live in we sometimes trip over the little important things. Peace and Love FayeG

E.
I think you should first explain to your husband why you want to stay in the hotel. To answer your question,no you are not wrong fro wanting to stay in a hotel. You are concerned for your daughter and husband. the best to you.

It sounds like u want to spend time together-the fight is only about sleeping arrangements. U don't seem to mind the drive up and if you Mil and daughter get along and are happy spending time together, all the better!
Also really nice of your husband to make the drive and sleep on sofa. He is making a sacrifice bc he wants everyone together. So maybe best for him to tell his mom that it hurts his back and he is the one who decided on a hotel stay. Its harder if it comes from you.

absolutely not--stay in the hotel. It might even help you view the situation in a better light. You can tell her that it is also for her benefit, fewer meals to cook, no laundry, no one to share the shower with. You can spin this in a positive light.

E.,

I think staying in a hotel is an excellent idea. She still gets to see her grandchild and everyone is more comfortable. If it works out maybe you will be able to visit more often. She should like that a lot.

Good luck,
R.

Mother-in-laws can always be a problem. It's better to do what's best for you and your family now rather than later. she will be mad and probably make a big fuss but it will pass. Doing this also could give you and your husband time alone once you baby gets old enough to spend the night with grandma. good luck, stand up for yourself.

Staying at a hotel is an option.

When my family journeys to the south to the family house, we bring fans in the summer and space heaters in the winter anong with sheets, towels and any other necessities of life.

Perhaps an air mattress to accomodate both you and your husband may be an option as well to act as a substitute to the uncomfortable accomodations.

Apologise for the argument and try to gently express to her how you feel. Ask if she would be open to some suggestions on how to make her space more accomodating. Also consider making arrangements for her down to visit with you more often.

It is important for your little one to see the adults playing nice and working things out. Hope this is helpful to you.