C. S. Lewis wrote, "Crying is all right in its own way while it lasts. But you have to stop sooner or later, and then you still have to decide what to do.”
So here are a few random ideas that may help you ease your heart, and all the rest of you, too:
I suggest you sit down and plan your days *in detail* for the next six weeks. Before the sun rises on each day, decide what you will do that you need to do (your daily work); what you and your children will do together (playing a game, teaching them something); what you will do for yourself (window shopping for 15 minutes, getting a pedicure, getting a new book from the library - nothing fancy or expensive, just something for *you*); what you will do for fresh air (walking, running, playing, with and without your children); what you will do for a project (crafts? Writing? Building a room on your house? Taking an online class? Repairing your car?).
You want to fill up your days with scheduled (not random) activity. You should also "schedule" (or allow) a few minutes each day to cry. But set your timer! Don't slide into a mope.
When you're in a major transition of this kind, it's tempting to be ruled by hopelessness, and try to put the world on hold or seek escape in ways you wouldn't want your children to do. So take the initiative - take charge. Even if you can only do it on and off, do it.
Go overboard (practically) with healthy, optimistic, wholesome activity for you and your family.
Definitely start a journal and record everything you're thankful for every day.
Get a new hair style.
Read to your children every night when you can.
When you think about you-know-who, remember that he left you because he said you made his life boring ("routine"). Remember that he tried to make you feel as if HIS attitude were YOUR fault.
If you have supportive friends, see if you can get together with them once in a while. But not to whine, not to drink, and not to look at men. Be with friends who like themselves, who like you, and who *do* things.
Refuse to seek another relationship. You can stand alone. One of the best requirements for a woman to have a man is that she doesn't need to have one.
Find a copy of Jane Austen's "Sense and Sensibility" and read it. It's about a life-loving young woman who is fooled and dumped by a very charming man.
If you need to, see a counselor. You're not the only woman who has been left (but you're the one you know best). If your children need it, take them to a counselor.
I've been where you are, more or less, and so have many mamas on this site. We're your cheering section! This chapter in your life may be at an end - but the book will go on. Wait and see!