My son will be 3 in May. For the last month, he has been in big boy undies and has been really successful urinating on the toilet with maybe one accident a day at most (with timely encouragement of course) However, he refuses to poop on the toilet even when he has to go and is visibly uncomfortable. We have tried a multitude of things from distraction (reading stories, singing songs), reward systems, touching toes, etc to no avail. He just poops in his undies. I've tried taking his pants off when he needs to go to see if that helps and it doesn't, it just prolongs the situation where he's on/off the toilet for an hour or so, still with no success. Any other ideas?
I've checked out the same website GrammaRocks suggests, and it looks sound and sensible. I've heard and read a number of good reports about this approach, although have not had to employ it with any kidlets.
Bear in mind that your son is still at the early end of completed training for average boys. He should get there with the right incentive.
I don't really have any good advice, other than to just be patient. He'll get it. My son did the same thing. He potty-trained just great, just before he turned 3, but would ask for a diaper to poop in (for about 4 months). I tried lots of different things. Finally one day, he had diarrhea and I gave him a diaper, but it ran down his leg and I told him that diapers don't work for diarrhea, he has to use the toilet. He did, and that was that! After that he never asked for another diaper. I never really pushed it, and we never had any issues, nor any accidents. All kids are different, but for us he had some 'fear' about it and I know there was also a power struggle going on. I know it's so frustrating though! I did read the article provided below and you could certainly try some of the things suggested. If he resists though, I wouldn't push it. You could create even larger problems. Best of luck!
I used the exact website GammaRocks suggested. It worked for my twins this summer. Follow it exactly as written and you'll see results.
If you're putting him on the regular toilet, it may be that it's too big and he doesn't feel secure enough.
Try getting a step stool that he can put his feet on while he's on the toilet. It makes them feel much more secure and he may feel comfortable enough to try to poop.
We had some luck with my little girl recently (who was potty trained, then started pooping her pants). She had just been wearing white cotton training undies. We went to the store together and picked out "decorative" undies. She calls them her "beautiful undies." I told her that when she poops in the toilet, she can choose a pair to wear. Within a day she had pooped in the pot, and gleefully asked for her undies. The first time she pooped in her lovely underwear, she cried and frankly has not pooped in her pants again since. Best of luck and remember, it will all come together in time :)
Yes, check out this link for many helpful ideas on how to help "poop holders" go on the potty. It's a very common problem for a multitude of reasons, but I will tell you, once you get him to poop on the potty it should be much easier for him to continue to do so. I used tips from the site and my guy, 26 months at the time, was literally running to poop in the potty in a little over a day, all due to his "power incentive" : ) It will happen!
