Planning My Own Wedding

Updated on May 16, 2013
M.M. asks from Valdosta, GA
16 answers

I am getting married and I am not using a wedding planner, I am doing it myself. We found a venue but have not set a date yet. We are looking at a Saturday 2:00 pm to have just finger food. We have both been married before so we do not want to make a big deal of it. I am looking for suggestions not only for food but decoration ideas. The venue is a River Farm House with a large room with a full kitchen that seats 150. Outside is a long walkway bridge to cross over the pond to the gazebo which is surrounded by water for the ceremony. There is plenty of space for seating around the gazebo.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

What is the venue? We planned my daughter's wedding which was held in a hotel event space. We had appetizers only and the hotel provided those at a very reasonable cost. They gave us choices, too. The room was already tastefully decorated as a wine cellar and so we didn't have to do much for decorations. I did provide some candles and flowers which we had arranged at very little cost by Safeway. We also provided the cake. These arrangements were very inexpensive. We only had 20 or so guests. The entire cost, including the formal wedding and maid of honor gowns, was less than $500 if I remember correctly.

2 moms found this helpful

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I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

You'd probably have better luck on PInterest.com

6 moms found this helpful

O.H.

answers from Phoenix on

Jane is right. Weddings are a personal thing and you need your own taste and budget, etc. I got married for a second time and planned everything myself. Just google "wedding ideas" and "wedding check list" and see what comes up. Good luck.

3 moms found this helpful
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B.S.

answers from Chicago on

When I got married for the second time (hubby's first) we had the ceremony and reception at a big Victorian house/bed and breakfast. We had about 60 guests and my 11 year old son gave me away and read a poem. We also had a 'brunch' with finger foods - we got married in the morning and made it clear on the invite that food and cake would be served but not a 'sit down' dinner. We also got out of having the expense of a bar this way and later everyone told me that they had gotten plenty of food and hadn't missed the booze at all. You can totally do most of the stuff yourself- my biggest advice is to focus on what is REALLY important to you. If it is the dress- make that your splurge. If you have always dreamed of a certain cake- cut corners on other things, but get that cake! If you have always dreamed of peonies, don't get carnations. Be willing to cut costs and compromise on the things that really DON'T matter as much to you, but be very clear with yourself and hubby to be about how you both see the 'priorities'. For me, it was having beautiful photos- lots of candids and black and white photos- with the benefit of hindsight, I knew that I would be so busy and distracted during the actual event that I would miss seeing a lot!! So having a lot of great photos of the wedding and guests and my son and family was really important. Also- never lose sight of the MOST important thing: really, in the end, nothing about the wedding or reception is as important as the person you're marrying!! Sometimes it can be easy for that to get lost in all the commotion! Good luck and blessings to you and your husband to be!

3 moms found this helpful
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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Oriental Trading now has a lot of options they didn't used to have before.

http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-planning/wedding-budge...

If you avoid the word "wedding" you can often get a better deal. I used a "conference room" for my wedding. I would never have afforded the venue otherwise.

Friends did appetizers only but had a lot to choose from, and salad and drinks. It was wonderful.

Another friend of mine got some large vases from a thrift store and used them to make her own large arrangements for each table. I am not sure if she went to one of those places florists get flowers or if she went to the grocery store. I went to the grocery store to get my reception flowers (we vased them ourselves) but we ordered the wedding party flowers. Remember to delegate! I wish I had done more.

2 moms found this helpful

R.H.

answers from Houston on

I am so glad to hear that you are not going the millionaire wannabe route like most brides. I would enlist 5 good, crafty girlfriends (all ages) and fix a lunch for them every Friday and start planning. This sounds like so much fun, but no, do not take it all on yourself!

It seems that we all want to be a part of this? Can you tell by the responses? I smile at how we are all coming together on this.

Like Bronwyn, my son gave me away at my second wedding.

KiddiePshrink, gave very detailed lists. She is a team player!

Again, best wishes. I wish I were in your town! I would pitch in too!

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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I planned mine myself & it was great.
I did print out a Bridal checklist from the internet. I either got it from The Nest
or googled it.
That saved me because it covered everything so I didn't forget anything.
A few things that make the venue sparkle:
-strands of white lights
-white votive candles
-big hurricane candle holders w/big white candles

Be sure you have music (DJ or iPod set up to a speaker ((this one doesn't
work out as well in my opinion)).

Be sure you have enough food or guests will leave because they are starving. While your ceremony is at 2pm & you have finger food, that is very
light fare & your celebration will run into the 5pm dinner hour. Guests will be
hungry. I would make sure your menu includes heartier fare (like roast beef,
dinner rolls or sliced deli meat, sliced cheeses, rolls. Add in veggie trays,
salads, etc.).

Congratulations! May your day be beautiful and your life together blessed!

2 moms found this helpful

J.S.

answers from Hartford on

Get the Martha Stewart wedding planner. It's AWESOME in helping you keep track of your wedding planning and giving you ideas. You can also keep all of your contracts and receipts and all other paperwork in order in this planner, and the whole thing acts as a keepsake later on. I still have mine 15 years later.

http://www.amazon.com/Martha-Stewarts-Keepsake-Wedding-Pl...

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L.M.

answers from Orlando on

I'd check pintrest - and also...... what kind of venue is it? That would make a difference too......and how many people are you inviting.

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Hit your library and see if they have any good books. I got "1001 ways to save money and still have a fabulous wedding" at a discount bookstore. You can also google, and hit pintrest as well. A theme should help give you direction. Simple and classic always works. We did a basic cake, and had an ice cream sundae bar for dessert - LOVED it. Whatever you think is fun, let that guide you.

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K.P.

answers from Miami on

I love this idea! Congratulations... for what it's worth most people do not use a wedding planner. We had a huge formal wedding and planned the whole thing without one, so don't stress about that!

I would suggest hiring a caterer because they will be able to give you guidance. They are not nearly as expensive as you would expect. Most caterers will work within your budget and find ways to feed your guests without breaking your budget! If you are willing to have the event on a Sunday, it will be even less expensive.

Suggestions:
- Limit your beverage choices to control costs... beer, wine, champagne (for the toast), water and soft drinks
- Consider a "garden party" during which you get married. Have your guests arrive and the food and drinks available. I would suggest having them arrive at 2:00 and plan on walking over the bridge around 2:30. The ceremony will likely be short, so you can continue your party immediately after. Maybe plan on cutting the cake around 4:00 with your "exit" at 5!

Food thoughts:
- Avoid "dips" b/c they are tough to "hold" and "carry"
- Things on toothpicks and skewers are great!

Meatballs, fruit kebabs, chicken satay, caprese skewers, shrimp, oysters, empanadas, egg rolls, spring rolls, sliders (burgers or pulled pork)

Definitely get some catering quotes. If you have an idea of your budget and find someone you like... they will help you find a way to make it work!

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J.K.

answers from Kansas City on

Well, my first thought is picnic tables and mason jars. Can you make some table decorations with mason jars? Maybe you could put some wildflowers in them. Might fit the theme of where you will be. I agree with the others on checking Pinterest, they will have lots of food ideas. I'm sure anything that is an appetizer or finger food will be a hit. Congrats!!

1 mom found this helpful

S.S.

answers from Dallas on

I am planning a vow renewal and have found literally hundreds of ideas for DIY stuff on Pinterest!

1 mom found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I'd sure make sure it was earlier in the day for an outside wedding or the midst of winter when it might be a little cooler in Georgia......

I planned my last wedding too. I had been married and used a wedding planner and did all that. This time hubby had not been married before and we had a really nice church wedding. I think you'll do just fine other than I would hate being so hot and sweaty outdoors. I am sooooo not an outdoor person..

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D.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

I think it will be easy for you to come up with ideas just by checking out sites like Pintrest. One thing I would recommend is not to try to do everything yourself the day of the wedding. Find/hire someone to help on the day of. You will be too involved and want to mingle with guests and don't want to be worrying about getting the food brought out and other details.

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

It this it?
http://www.theriversfarmhouse.com/amenities.html

Chair rental - for the ceremony and the reception
Chairs and about 6 round tables (6-8 person) for the reception
1 table for drinks
1 table for gifts
Lots of mini lights (Christmas lights)
Some type of garland/lights/bells for the bridge
White tableclothes

Food.
Items that don't have to be kept cool or hot
veggie tray
cupcakes
mini pies
petite fours
cookie tray

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