Photos of My Child on Facebook

You are being way to sensitive here! Ask and the school and the person will think you are crazy. Let it go. This is not something to worry about for a second.

Personally I think you're making a big deal out of nothing, but if it truly bothers you so much (exactly what do you think will come of group field trip photos on her Facebook page?), you should contact her personally. Perhaps you should ask the school to add yet another addendum to field trip policy stating that people can't post photos of other's children online without written permission.

I think you are justified, this upsets me too as it's happened with us as well.

I would contact the school and request they ask her to remove the photos. You can also contact facebook.

Sorry but I think you're being over sensitive. I'm sure she meant no harm and put them up for other moms who are friends with her on fb to enjoy. If they were specifically of your child then I'd agree.
Do not complain to the school, that is overkill and it will only cause drama. Just contact her directly if you must but I really do think you're overreacting. I'm sure her being a mom and having a child your age she would not jeopardize any child's privacy or safety by posting them and having any wierdo or stranger be able to look at them. You can even ask her if her page is private or if the pics are private, just to be safe.

Good Lord....I think you are way sensitive.. a group shot of children having fun?

And to the person who made the comment about pedophiles doctoring up pictures, etc... Good grief....What a life you must live to be in so much paranoia.

Back to your question......If you choose to be THAT mom that is your choice but don't be passive aggressive about it and hide behind the school. The school did not take the pictures. It is not their business.

If it is that big of a deal then be a real person and ask the mom face to face like a mature adult vs going behind her back like some coward.

You also might want to make sure you child has a big note pinned on him/her so everyone knows to leave him/her out of all the fun activities where some pictures will be taken. Gees. I don't get how this violates you.... I just don't understand some people who live in such fear and paranoia and something so simple is a violation.

Is your child's name or other personally identifiable information on the photos?

If not, you're being way too sensitive. If there's no PII, she's just another kid.

So there are group shots of kids having fun...oh MY GOD!! As long as your daughter is not tagged or other identifying information is not provided, then can you please explain (I am being serious) why this is so violating to you? The only way I can see this bothering you is if your daughter is in a special school that you wish to keep private. I mean, is this really the first time someone has taken a picture of your child other than you and put it out into a public forum? I have asked that bad pictures of my son be either removed or a tag removed but I love it when people tag me on pictures of my son. So yeah, I might be one of those moms who takes pictures and posts them from a field trip.

And to all the moms worried about perverts, wackos, wierdos, and pedophiles on the internet, sorry to break it to you, but those types are everywhere. If you are worried about them, then look at your own circle or family, friends, and aquiantences. When a child is molested, it is usually by someone the family knows and trusts.

Is your child is some danger if someone sees that picture? Is someone looking for him/her?

Our photos from school events are regularly posted on our own facebook pages, and the school's facebook page and website. That's how we share pictures at our school. If there were a concern about the safety of a child then of course those pictures would be taken down.

If you have no issues like that, then yes, you're being oversensitive. This is the digital age. Without a valid reason I think you will look like a crazy person running from person to person -- or to the school -- asking them to remove photos of your child. It will keep happening because nowadays people post pictures. Soon your child will have a facebook and will be posting pictures of his/her own.

Updated

Okay - first, take a breath.
As long as your daughter is not tagged or identified in the photos, it doesn't really matter. If she's labeled your daughter or tagged her, then you might ask her to untag her. They are her pictures - her property - and really, she can do whatever she wants with them.
I think you are over reacting and need to relax a little bit. I don't like to see my kids' pictures posted by others, but as long as they aren't identified by name, I let it go - especially if they are group pictures. I also think it's really nice of those parents who can attend the event to take pictures for those who can't be there. Not once has anyone ever asked me NOT to take pictures... That said, I post my pix to Snapfish.com and give the parents access to the pictures -- which is much more private than FB. BUT you have to have everyone's email address to do that and honestly, it's a pain.
The other thing you have to remember is that if it's a group picture, it might even be published in the newspaper. Nothing is more public than that... So - think about it before you make a stink...

YMMV
LBC

Was your child identified by name? If not, I don't think it's that big of a deal. Unless it was an individual picture of your kid, yes you are being overly sensitive and unreasonable – it was a school group outing. You can ask the parent if her FB profile is private or public, and if public, ask her to remove the photos with your child. I know that in this age of FB some parents lack good judgment and post everything and anything. But group photos of classes, public activities, sporting events and so on where a child is part of a group should not be made into a big deal.

I take YB photos for my daughter's grade school throughout the year, and I do take pics of her on occasion at lunch, etc. I will always have some school adult in the cafeteria at some point in the year comment that I can't take pictures of any other kids but my own. I do not post any of these pics on FB. I would have an issue if my kid was named on FB or YouTube or some public forum, but if not I'm ok with it on private settings.

I think way too many people are going overboard on complaining about pictures. We live in an age where cameras are everywhere. People post stuff online with cell phones. Yes, common sense is needed, but being overly whiny about it is detrimental to all. My kids have been going to YMCA classes over the years for 9+ years. At a swim class last August, the teen lifeguards said I couldn’t take pictures of my child in swim class. A new policy was adopted for the "privacy" of the patrons. I inquired more and found out the photo ban was city wide in the greater Houston area. A worker there said there were complaints by some parents about photos taken with their kids and posted online.

Instead of the Y addressing the issue with a reasonable and common sense policy regarding photos and online postings, they punished everyone with a knee jerk response to ban all photos. How they will enforce this is have no idea. What about sports games, recitals, birthday parties there, etc.? How is taking pics at a dance recital different than taking photos a few times in classes? I paid for those classes and I want memories of my child in the classes. Their answer was to have the instructor or coach do a few posed pictures after the class. What? Give me a break. There is often no time with back to back classes there. Anyway, I will no longer waste my money to pay for classes at the YMCA because of this ridiculous policy.

So you see, many overly sensitive complainers and stupid corporate decisions ruined it for everyone at the YMCA. I can only hope other places don’t see this large business do this and follow suite. Unless there is a REAL threat to your child being in a FB positing, please lighten up. Discuss it with the other parent positing, but don’t complain to the school. Like most situations (especially with schools), instead of common sense in addressing an issue, a punitive zero tolerance policy goes into effect and penalizes everyone. Usually, a minority of complainers ruin things for the majority of parents who don’t overreact to issues that can be resolved through parents communicating with each other.

***By seeing the other responses and all the unreasonable ideas and paranoia, I guess there are a lot more complainers out there than I thought. Some of you people need to chill out and quit thinking the world only revolves around you and your offspring. People take pictures in public all the time. It must be exhausting looking at everyone as potential criminals and pedophiles. If you have issues, discuss them with the parent. It is NOT the school's business.

You are being sensitive. It is your life but you will come off as that mom and in the end she does not have to pull them down.

If they have your child's picture linked with her name then it would not be unreasonable to ask them to remove that.

Other than that she is just in a picture with the other person's child, nothing more. Can you just imagine some poor mom, oh hey!! I need to take a picture of my child, she is over there being cute. All you in the background, is it okay?? By that time the kid has graduated college.

Just NICELY with a BIG SMILE say, hey, those pictures are so cute, sorry to be a grump, but we actually don't want our child online for safety reasons. She'll take them right down. I've had to do that before getting tagged in photos, because my husband is "publicly known" and we have some stalker issues so I've asked people not to post me or the kids with names, but never angrily or uptightly. My kids have been posted in homeschool activities anonymously on various sites and that doesn't bug me. We recently went on a farm day and the farm posted my kids petting the sheep (no names) for their website which I thought was flattering. And I don't mind if friends post them with no names. They've also been in the newspaper a couple of times which I don't mind. Your reasoning doesn't really matter, just your tone. And reporting it to school? No. No need to seem like a super freaky mom. No need to make enemies. The person thought the pictures were cute and fun that's all. Although if it's important to you for everyone's safety that the school does not allow people to post kids, you may want to address that in general, but don't single out that teacher if other people do it too. Actually, my daughter was posted in her schools online shots too-no name, and our stalkers wouldn't know to look there. So I didn't care. If it's not against policy, you're trying to make it a policy, not attacking anyone.

Wow. I'm shocked people have an issue with this. A solo picture of my child with her name maybe I'd not be so happy about but group shots? Who cares? I'm sure this mother meant no harm. Nice of her to be the one to volunteer and go on the field trip... Don't forget that part. And there can easily be random pictures taken all over. Walking down the street - someone could snap a picture and post it. Will your kids ever be on a sports team? People will snap pictures then too and your children may be in those pictures that are then posted or even put in the newspaper. I would let it go.

I'm in agreement with the mom's that think you're being oversensitive here.

Do you not have any pictures of your kids on FB? Or anywhere on the internet?

I post the same kind of pictures, but am friends with most of the parents in my kids classes, or at least know it won't bother them. I wouldn't post a picture of kids who weren't mine - aside from my daughter's dance troupe where we basically are a big family. I've found pictures of my daughter on other people's pages and I just tag myself in them. It's nice to see the shots other people get. Sometimes they are of a better angle then mine and are exactly what I'm looking for in the "yearbook" I'm making for them.

If you don't want them on there (how do you know if you're not friends with her?) simply message her and nicely ask her to remove any photos that have your child in them. She should understand and remove them....but I'm sure she didn't think anyone would be upset by her posting them.

I would never post school pictures of other kids on facebook. People do it ALL the time though.
Things like where my daughter goes to school, etc are private. Who knows whos on her friends list.
I would contact the woman directly and ask that she take them down. Its against facebook rules anyways.

I would ask her to take down the ones of your child.

Then I would call the school to advise them of what happened stating you are not happy with that type of thing.

I'm in agreement with you. I'm very particular about what pictures I do post on FB (I get a lot of flack about not posting more and my stance).

Contact the school and request that chaperones are told not to post pictures of the field trips on their FB pages without permission from each child's parent (in the picture).

I attended a field trip and took a ton of pictures. My intention is to burn a CD to give to the school. I posted 2 pictures of the field trip on my FB page of JUST my daughter (and one with the back of a head of another kiddo).

I think talking about these topics (especially on here) makes more parents aware that we all look at things differently, and we need to respect one another.

I wouldn't like for somebody to take it upon him-/herself to do that with anybody's child. Regarding my child, I would go to the principal and ask that they be removed and that some policy be established for requesting permission before something like this or not taking photos at all. Even with my friends' children or family members I do not post pictures of other people's children on Facebook.

When I gave birth, my husband was not allowed to take pictures in the nursery because of the privacy of the other babies. Of course, he wasn't taking pictures of the other babies. We understood and complied. A similar policy should be applied to school-sponsored activities. The school should take more responsibility for this type of issue.

Maybe you're being way sensitive, maybe not, but it's your kid and your right. And should be your call. I am annoyed by the people who insist that you should not give this another thought. You have a right to parent in the way that you see fit--for whatever your reasons--just as they do. If it's no big deal to them, fine. They should treat it like it's no big deal. If it is a big deal to you, then you get to treat it like a big deal. You know why this matters to you, and you don't owe us any explanation so that we can determine if this decision gets our seal of approval.

I would ask her to take them down, then contact the principal to make her aware of your concerns. Our school makes us choose whether or not we give permission to be in published photos. Also, facebook allows parents to request removal of photos.

I think you're justified in being upset, not everyone has or wants to join the world of facebook and have their info out there. The only photos I post are of our family, because I think it's inconsiderate to assume someone else might not mind me posting photos of their child.

When parents take photos of the kids at my son's preschool, they always post them directly on the school's website which only the parents are allowed to view with a username and password. I've also had parents email me class photos which they post on a site like Shutterfly. I know the photos are still out there, but it's not the same as being posted on Facebook, many people do not have their settings set so that only "friends" can view them. And the reality is that there are a lot of wackos out there surfing the internet. I feel like this is just one more thing we now have to worry about!

I think you're totally justified. I do take pictures at my son's school when I go for recitals and parties, but I would NEVER put photos of anyone else's kid on Facebook or Flickr without their explicit permission. I either email the photos to the parents or get one-hour prints done at CVS and give them to the teacher to distribute to the parents I don't know.

Even though I'm not personally concerned about my kid's photo on Facebook, I have NO IDEA what each of the other children's personal situation is -- there could be custody issues, etc. that I'm unaware of -- and I don't know what each parent's position on the issue is. Even if it's not a privacy issue, and the parent is simply uncomfortable having their child's image online, that is their right! It's no different to me than a parent who asks that their kid not be allowed jump on a trampoline when visiting the neighbor's house, and the neighbor lets the kid jump anyway because she doesn't think it's a big deal.

As a parent, YOU get to make decisions like this for your child. I would contact the woman personally and ask her to take down the pictures of your child, and I would also contact the school. Obviously everyone doesn't understand the general etiquette of Facebook, so the school should make an effort to outline a policy and share it with visiting parents.

Per school rules at my kids' school: there are privacy rules and you cannot take photos of some kids and then post them publicly.
So what that Mom Volunteer did, is against school regulations. Per my kids' school.

You need to tell the school.
And, if that Mom posted the school's name and the child's name, this can be uncomfortable for a parent.

Tell the school.
Let them handle it.
Because then, it is "official" business and the school, telling her. Not some random Mom that she can just disregard and make drama about.

Whether or not you are over sensitive or justified, is not the problem.
The issue is, this makes you uncomfortable and if you are one that does not like your child's photos being publicly posted someplace, then tell the school. Because I am sure, the school has privacy rules about this.

Justified! Although the mother probably did this as what she considered a good gesture, "Look at all the fun the class had", she has no right to post pictures of your child.

Contact the school because she needs to remove all of the children's pictures, not just yours.

I see a comment about the waiver. Does she work for the school? If she does, I would still ask about it. I don't think the school has a FB. It is likely it is her private FB account under her name. Still ask the school to ask her to remove them.

Seems like some of you are making a big deal about nothing. Simply ask the lady to take the photo down, end of story. I'm sure she didn't mean any harm. She was simply including your child in the field trip pics. It's not like she put a pic of your daughter with name, address, and phone number or something. It's a group pic from her field trip. One of the comments here said that this lady that posted the pics must not have a life for posting pics on Facebook. That is ridiculous. More people than you know use Facebook these days. Have a good day and God Bless!!

i dont see where the issue is.. I scanned my daughters ballet groups photo and posted it to FB. One of the parents is a friend of one of my co workers who is on my FB. If she or anyone were to ask me to take them down, and they werent even my FB friend, I would say no.. Sorry.

I don't know if this has been mentioned but you may have no say in it with the school if you signed the handbook and did not specifically check the box for no pictures...yes this mom does not work at the school but it was a school function...I don't know the "rules" or specifics.

I used to be like you...all up in arms if someone posted a picture of my kids on their FB...but I soon realized that if they're not tagged in the photo or specifically named then there is not much I can do. I have gone straight to the source and asked them to remove photos...some have been nice and removed and others well "Sure I will"...doesn't mean they did.

If you are going to ask it be removed then you should go straight to the parent...like someone else said "don't hide behind the school".

Did you sign a photo permission paper work at school? this is a big no, no.

What kind of person would post somebody else' kids pics? Btw she seems she has too much free time.

Facebook was suppose to be a networking site for successful adults not for desprate people with no lives.....

Many people don't think twice about it, but it doesn't take much for someone to crop a picture these days. There's a photo going around FB supposedly a 13 yr old who thinks he's all that and the image is really from an interview where he ran from a bear or something. Totally different but not everyone knows what the image is from. Or there was some jerk who got into an online tiff with someone else and stole his image so he took her profile picture which she now claims isn't even hers....there are some wacky people out there.

We routinely go to a large event and people take pictures. I can't keep DD out of all of them, but if I see people taking her picture, I remind them to please not post it on FB. If you can see your child and you are not FB friends, you know their settings are NOT set to private.

Anyway, I would talk to the school about it. They need to let her know (and other parents) that it's not a given that people want their kids online. If the school had you sign a form, then you need to review that form. Does it apply to chaperone's own pages? Or just school use? It's different now than when pictures went from camera/film to photo center to fridge. Now the whole world can see it and depending on the person's internet smarts, the world may know that these young children, with these names (tags) go to x school and visited the zoo. It doesn't take much for someone who means a child harm to have a nice little story going there. "I'm a friend of Bryan's mom, Mary. You know, the one who took you to the zoo with Joe and Susan and Ricky..."

If you can catch her at the school or if you are on FB yourself (I know not everyone is - my DH is not) you can send her a message and ask her to please take them down. I've done that route, too, but I'd still bring the concern to the school as well.

It's not the popular stance, so be prepared to just let the negativity roll. Speak up for your kid. I've been speaking to people about my DD's pictures since she was born and people know now. There are a lot fewer pictures, and most people do take them down. What I've told people (even her big sibs) is that right now she's too young to decide if she wants to be on FB, so I decide for her. And right now, the answer is no.

There are a lot of reasons people don't want their information posted. And, no, other than a few back of the head images, my child is offline. I do not post her. If she's in the far background or her face is not showing, I usually let it roll but, as hard as it is to believe, some parents DO NOT post their child to FB or anywhere online. My sister has taken the same stance with her son and the mother of my great-niece asked that her child not be posted once she was past the infant stage.

I think you are justified. Since this is a school trip, the school may be able to have her take them down. In reality though, we are all randomly at any given time, at the mercy of "paparazzi" nowadays. With all the camera phones around, any one of us, including children, can be victimized.

Contact the school to see if there are rules.

In my child school we sign a permission slip on the first day of school to use images of your child for the year.

In my daughters gymnastics class we have a 'closed' Facebook group and its strictly expressed your not allowed to post images of other kids just your own kids. Unless its a team photo. Ive uploaded images of the team to that group but not individual images. Most of the time Im taking pics of my child and if someone else gets in there I dont upload that image.

I can understand your concern...however, if you were to take pictures of your child's birthday party and happened to snap a shot of other children with him/her then you shouldn't post it on Facebook. If you take the kids out somewhere and you take a picture and there happens to be a kid running in the background, don't post it.

If this mother was taking pictures of her kid, and her kid happened to be part of a group, and she wants to share that photo with friends, I don't see an issue with it. However, if her child isn't in half of the pictures and she's just posting other people's kids on the internet, then yeah, that's weird.

Have you seen the photos? Is her kid in the photos that she posted and your kid just happens to have gotten into a few of them? If it's that she was taking pictures of her kid and what they were experiencing and your kid got snapped then teach your kid to shy away from cameras so this doesn't happen again. If I had an issue with it, I would also message her and let her know that you don't appreciate her posting pictures of your child and to remove them immediately.

**I apologize if I sound snotty, but after I've had a woman hack my Facebook and steal pictures of my kids and post them as her own, this seems very incidental and not at all like something to get in a huff over. If 99% of her pictures are of your child and the caption reads "My son..." "My daughter..." then yeah, I'd be pissed. (This is what happened to me. She took my photos and posted them on her Facebook page with captions like "Isn't my son such a cutie?!" and "My daughter loves her new bike!" Freaked me the hell out!)

I am torn here.....I don't think anyone should post pics of your child on the internet w/ out your permission. I'm sure that she didn't even think about it. But thats kind of the problem these days.

I'd contact the school. There should be a policy regarding chaperones taking pictures of kids and posting them on the internet.

you have a right to protest them being there. no reason you can't do it politely though. some people just don't think. but no i don't think posting pictures of other peoples' children is okay. you are right to point that out. the next mom might be psycho sue crazy mom!

Giving permission for electronic publication is strictly for school use only - the waiver does not apply to a persons personal Facebook page.

It is a SPOKEN rule not to post pics of other's w/o their permission.

Saying that, with all of the entitlement issues kids have these days - well I wonder where they get it from. Of course this mom feels the rules didn't apply to her. Contact the principal and let her know she posted pics of students w/o permission. The principal SHOULD contact her to take them down. If she doesn't feel the need to do so, then just send the mom a polite FB message telling her take down the pics of your child.

At the beginning of the school year we had to sign a paper saying if we wanted our kids picture pubished... if you signed a paper saying you didn't & this was a school field trip - the school letting her take her picture is a school issue. If you said she could have her pictures pubished all you can do is ask the mom nicely to remove any pics of her by herself. The ones as a groups - I don't know what to do... because her daughter might be in them also.

But since it was a school field trip & she was assisting during that trip - it may be better to have the school handle it... that way you might be able to stay annonomus & maybe keep a little more peace.

Personnaly, I only post my kids pictures online (which only my friends can see) - although I have taken pictures of school awards & classroom parties. I keep the group picture for the kids in hopes to make them a scrapbook someday. But I don't feel one parent should post another parent's child's picture without first talking to them.

contact this woman directly and RIGHT now, asking her to take the pictures with your child in them down RIGHT NOW!! a pedophile with the right software can doctor the picture and make the appear that he is "DOING" your child !we dont allow ANYONE to take a picture of our child without our permission,and without us knowing the person personally.
sounds paranoid ?? not if you watched the special on pedophiles that thought they "meeting" a child for sex.the police arrested so many men, of all ages, occupations, races, and religions that the police ran out of handcuffs.it took the police about six weeks to process them all !!
K. h.
dear jt, do you kiss your mother with that mouth ??obviously, you know very little about possible software applications and how pedophiles can and do manipulate pictures of children, so we wont even bother to go there, alright ? you want to live in a fantasy land where monsters cant possibly exist, go right ahead, i wont try to stop you.

Times are changing. I post my friends kids pictures all the time. If they don't want them on then I would take them off but so far no one has ever said anything. I do have to say I am friends with most of their families and friends too. I get lots of comments on them since the grandma's, Aunts and Uncles, etc...are all commenting on them.

I think telling the school is the right way to go. If she has posted them on a school page then she has every right to do this. Some of the papers you signed when you enrolled your child is a publicity release for pictures or they would not be able to take any pictures of classroom activities or parties, nothing. Technically not even school pictures. You would have to sign papers allowing them to photograph your child for any reason.

Did she tag you in them or name your daughter?

Otherwise, I don't see how there's much ground for complaint as it's really just a picture where your daughter is in the background, you know? I totally get what you're saying, and generally try not to TAKE pictures that include other peoples' kids for this very reason, but you're going to have to just agree to be unhappy about it this time.

Perhaps let your daughter know that she is not allowed to pose in people's pictures. Beyond that, it's just a hazard of being in public places or participating in group activities.

HTH

I think it's inappropriate to post pictures of someone else's kid on the internet without their parent's permission. If this was a school event, I would let the principal know that the mom did this. This really does need to be part of a school's policy, that parents can't post pictures anywhere online of other people's kids without their parents' okay, from school events. There is an internet form that we have to sign for school, for 4H, for scouts, for camp, about whether our kids' pictures can be used on their websites. If there's no identifying information on this woman's pictures, there's probably no danger to your child but I still think it's not okay to post the pictures.

You are not being overly sensitive. A lot of the new cameras (and cell phone cameras) will include location and other pretty specific information in the EXIF part of the picture.

If I were in your place, I'd ask nicely to make sure it doesn't happen again. There are just a majority of internet users who are not aware of the dangers hidden in a seemingly simple picture. Internet stalkers _will_ look for such!

I had a problem when someone wanted to post a picture of my son when he was wearing a school t-shirt!

P.S.
The problem with simply asking her to remove the picture(s) is that a lot of web browsers have already stored the picture on the computer! "Once on the internet, always on the internet" is a _real_ problem.

P.P.S.
The school has no control over what any parent does on the internet.
Other parents may not care.

I understand you want to not have your child on the internet. I would contact the person who posted them and inform her you are also going to contact the school so everyone is aware before pictures are taken that they must blur out your child or not post any images of your child. Including there body not just there face. Assuming you dont want them due to the enormous amount of child perves online :(

Yes, you are being oversensitive, and yes, you are justified.

I try really hard, when posting pics on Facebook, to not put pics of kids that aren't mine. If I know the parent, and know they don't mind, I will tag them. Otherwise, I either don't post the pic, or I will send an email to the parent asking if they mind if I post.

I would contact the school and have them ask the parent to remove the photos. I would also ask if there is a policy against parents posting pics of children that are not theirs. I know the school needs a release to use your kids in their promotional literature.

Good Luck

Schools are not aloud to put any pictures if children on any website without parents permission. So I would go to the school principal and let her know. She is probably not aware of this. PTA Historians are usually the person that takes those pictures and post them not the school.

Let her in a nice way. You don't want this to happen again.

The answer depends a lot on circumstances. You "heard" about these pictures, so maybe the mom has limited access to her FB page to close friends and family - not for every pedophile to see on the internet. Is there any personal info with hte pics such as the name of your child, name of the school or other people in the picture?