People That CIO

Not every child can CIO..i firmly believe this and this is why. We used CIO with our daughter at 5 months. It took exactly 2 nights of her crying for 30 minutes and it was over.

Now at 10 months we lay our girl down at 8 and she sleeps until 7 am. I cant even rock her anymore. After a bath I try to rock her a bit just to cuddle and she starts squirming-if you take her and lay her down, she rolls on her side and goes right to sleep.

She also isn't a 'needy' child. She doens't use pacifiers, I dont have to hold her alot, and she isn't whiney.

So from this I have decided that some children can handle and even look forward to going to bed on their own and some children prefer the comfort of their parents.

I think this is the only ting that explains the people who CIO and have night wakings for months later and the ones who get through it easy peasy, If you think your child isnt ready for it, try something else. Every child is different.

I did the CIO with my daughter, but it took us just 3 nights to get her sleeping. When I did CIO, I didn't just leave her to cry and never check back, I would go in at various intervals to let her know that I didn't abandon her. However, by the 3rd night, I didn't need to go in because she only cried for about 5-10 min and then was asleep, but she wasn't really crying just doing the whining moaning and I could tell it was her "tired" cry. I made sure I did the cry it out during a time that was completely normal...no holidays, schedule changes, illness, teething, etc. My son, on the other hand, is 9 months and he is a terrible sleeper. Up about every hour or so at night, wakes up at 5:30 am. I really need to sleep train him, however, we are in a temporary living situation until the end of the month and he is sleeping in our room. Once we move into our house, I will start with the CIO. I will give it a few days to get him acclimated to the change of the new house. My son has a much more sensitive personality than my daughter so I may need to change my strategy a L. with him. I would make sure your son is not going through a growth spurt, teething, sick, etc, but I would still try to stick to your routine as much as possible because if you throw it all out the window, you'll be back to square one. Good luck!

There is only one thing that breaks us from our typical schedule and that is illness. Otherwise we remain consistent and as a result, our baby takes a predictable morning nap, afternoon nap, goes to bed easily between 5:45 - 6:30 (hey, it's what he wants) and sleeps through the night, waking about 6:00. I'm sure you know this but around 8-9 months of age, the separation anxiety kicks in, so that might be influencing the behavior/waking. Still, we keep with our routine and the little 'bump in the road' with the schedule is really only a day or two and it's back to normal.

So yes, we follow the same routine regardless. Routine and regularity seems to help settle anxiety for our children and with our 8 month old, he knows when he goes down in the crib it is time to sleep. If he cries, it lasts maybe 3-5 minutes tops.

We tend to go with the developmental needs. So if he wakes for a few nights, we'll go to DS (2) and tuck him back in, etc...
But after about a week, if it's still going on, or if it appears to be becomming a habit, we'll do CIO. It's always been a last resort for us, but definiltely a reliable one.

With everything, we tend ot give it a week, and then let him cry, provided he's not sick or there are some other issues going on.

I think it'll depend a lot on where your comfort lies and what you consider a "gray area".

I agree a lot with Melissa. Give it a week or two. DON'T get into a habit, like you said. Babies LOVE to be able to predict what's coming and I read that a lot of waking in the middle of the night for babies is due to HABIT and not due to actual nursing NEED.

Rule out teething pain, gas, illness, etc before going back to CIO.

I also agree with Jennifer - go back in there and remind your kiddo that you're not abandoning him. I would not let him CIO for an hour. With my son, I'd go in there after 5 or 10 minutes and soothe him while he stayed in his crib. Good luck!

Trust me unless you are making it HAPPY FUN TIME and playing the child doesn't want to keep waking at night anymore than you. It doesn't become habit if you tend to their needs as needed. I tried the CIO with my son oh boy do I ever regret that. I feel stupid but I kept trying the CIO because I was a young mom and everyone kept telling me that it would work and to try this variant on it including doctors. After months of trying everything I just told everyone to F*** off because it was easier on everyone if I just kept doing the nighttime feedings and not go in his room every few minutes and back out or that he would eventually cry himself to sleep because that never happened he just cried until his throat was raw (poor thing). He needed the night time wakings and once he stopped needing them he slept through the night with no work needed on my part. It was like some flipped a switch in him.

The same thing happened/happens with my daughter. She still goes through the wonder weeks where suddenly she is up every hour or more wanting to nurse or just be comforted. She is growing out of comfort nursing of her own will and my own surprise and will get angry if I offer her a breast (she thinks bottles/pacifiers are evil) instead of immediately sing her a lullaby and rock her.

However every kid is very different. You have to adapt your parenting to their needs and some kids as strange as it sounds would prefer to fuss on their own for a few minutes alone while others need that constant attention and some could be unhappy no matter what you do. We all are trying to meet our kids needs as best we can in the way we think will benefit them the most.