Parenting Question

Same thing happened with me as Rebecca C...didn't know my little girl had DS until her birth. The Dr. knew immediately. She has been a gift to me and my family and has made our lives even better than they were. Good luck to you.

I have a son with downs. He is 21 years old now.. but it feels like yesterday that I was told of it.. I was told in the recovery room after delivery. .. I asked how they could tell.. it turns out there are many tell tale signs.. Small ears among them. It's funny that the first thing they told me was .. his little pinky finger is curved inwards.. I laughed at the time..because you see.. it is a strong family traight.. we all have the same curved inward pinkies..I figured he was just part of the family !!
But other things they spotted.. the almond shaped eyes..set slightly apart.. not the size so much.. but the placement ( slightly LOWER) of the ears.. The space between the big toe and the next toe..and the biggie of 'em all.. the simmian crease.( the "M" on the palm of the hand.) then there's the loose muscle tone. All things I'm sure your Dr. should have checked by now.. But like the others have answered.. call if there's ANYTHING that concerns you at all. I have listed these things not to make you paranoid, but rather to let you know.. one thing that may seem odd to you at this time.. may just be nothing to worry about.. at least .not by itself. Put your mind to ease.. call the Doc.

Oh.. Downs kids are frequently ( not always) born early..and often have heart defects..murmurs if you will.. at birth. These sometimes heal or close on thier own.. and some need surgery..but again.. the Drs. and nurses have already checked all this if you gave birth in a hospital.

As to my son... wouldn't trade him for the world !!

My ears are really small... I don't think I'm Down's. <grin>

I believe that the solution is not, in fact, in finding out if your daughter has trisomy as much as it is for you to find a healthy way to limit worrying time.

This is taking up a lot of energy, right?

You don't want anymore energy drained in such fruitless pursuits, right?

You really don't want to spend the next 20 years not sleeping because of whatever storm is roiling around in your head, yeah?

There are any number of worry-reduction plans that you can use, but the most effective one I've ever run into is the Reality Plan. It's based mostly on questions, like:

~ Is this really happening right now? (This matters because your body is responding to your thoughts as if it were... which beyond making your crazy is extremely draining, physically)

~ Do I have all the information I need? (you don't have the tools at home to diagnose D.S.... either do a lot more research or ask someone who knows and/or can actually find out and leave it alone until you know more.)

~ Am I distracting myself from something real that I need to attend to? (ooh, worry is a popular addiction -a fantastic way to avoid problems in front of your face is to invent a host of them in your head so you can't see out anymore.)

~ What is really happening now? (Look around and see what you can see, smell what you can smell, touch what you can reach, hear the sounds around you... it is not possible to be focused on what is actually happening AND what is not happening, so the more you pay attention to what is real around you the less time you'll have to spend being afraid of things that are not happening.)

~ If I worry about this for the next 30 years, will it stop it from happening?

When it all gets completely on top of you, lie down on the living room floor and stare at the ceiling until the feeling passes. It will.

K.,
From a nurse and a mom to a wonderfully handsome 5 year with Down syndrome, I would say to call your doctor for piece of mind. Worrying is not helping you or anyone else.

What made you think of Down syndrome? Did they metion it to you during the ultra sound?

As a nurse I can tell you that infants with Down syndrome have left the hopistal with out the diagnosis until later. But Down syndrome or not, a baby is a baby that needs love. I think your baby is very lucky to have a mommy that cares so much.
Just call the peditrician! My best friend is a peditrician and she gets calls all the time about different things so they are used to it!

By the way, I had twins and therefore 5 ultrasounds and there were never any markers of Down syndrome for my son. He just came into the world as a baby with Down syndrome and changed our lives for the better!

K.,
Next appointment, mention your concerns. They have you in every month at first then taper off. Just ask when you're there, don't freak and run in to see them over it. Take a breath, smooch your baby & try to enjoy this time. Would her having DS change how much you love her? Will worrying change it? I doubt it on both counts. It's easy for me to say but my daughter was born with a cleft palette & I worried so much I got shingles at age 23!! My worry only made things worse, so please, keep your cool, your babies need you. As my grandma would say, don't borrow trouble, it'll find you on its own.

Hugs,
D.

I would think that the doctor's would have picked up on that already. If it bothers you, then take her in and ask specifically about her small ears. Part of the doctor's job is to reassure fretting mothers. I suspect that she just has really cute, little ears.

Hey, my ears are small....so small that at seven the guy that pierced them had a difficult time centering them...I have wop-sided piercings to this day and I'm 42.

K., I would think the Apgar score would have told the doctors whether there was a problem. I don't think they would have hidden information from you with all the potential for malpractice and all. Good luck and I hope that all turns out well.

Physicians have heard everything!! If there is something that is bothering you or causing you concern regarding your child and their health, ask your physician! They can assess the "concern" and answer you to their best ability. If there was nothing blatantly obvious at your child's birth, there wouldn't be anything bad to say especially at such a joyful time in a families life. Go to your doctor and voice your concerns, you'll feel so much better after you do. Health concerns don't make us love our children less, they make us more fiercely protective. I hope all will be well, best to you and your family!

I have two friends that have had children with Downs and one was caught before delivery, and one immediately after the baby was born because of characteristics they saw. I would not worry at this point. She may just be a petite little thing and that is okay! If you are concerned, to relieve your fears, I do think that it is okay to ask the doctor. After all, questions are never a dumb thing, but a place for us to gain knowledge.

The doctors would have notified you when she was born if she had Down Syndrome...it is obvious if your child has it

Are there any other signs of down syndrome? A thick tounge or slanted eyes? I wouldnt go to the dr just for her ears being small but you could bring it up at your one month check-up. If it makes you feel any better I am 25 I dont have down syndrome but I have ears that are way too small for my head.

Any concerns you have about your child warrant at the very least a call to the doctor.

From one overly-anxious mother to another, I would ask the Dr. about it. If you can wait until her next appointment then wait. If not, give them a call. Everything will most likely be fine and you may feel silly for calling afterwards, but it is the only thing that will ease your mind. Call, it will make you feel better.

My oldest daugher is 8 and her birthmother was 44 when she was born and she has extremely tiny ears, drs have noticed and she has had tons of tubes put in becaues of that and she notices, I just tell her they are perfect and she is beautiful and I know she does not have down syndrome. You might just have a sweet little one with sweet little ears. You are the mom though and you know. If the dr appt is nt too stressful and not too much money then take her in to have it documented and maybe theycan reassure you she does not have DS or they can tell you lets watch out for these signs and yo can keep your eye on it. Mothers instincts are good so do not ignore your heart. Hang in their you are blessed.
J.

If you're really that concerned, why not just run it past her doctors? Believe me, they get all kinds of calls for everything under the sun and if this concerns you, you should ask. I called my son's doctor more times than I care to think of when I first had him, but that's what they are there for. Now I have 2 children and never call because I have a little training under my belt. Every caugh, every cold, I laugh about it now because they knew my name when I called! There are 1001 things to freak you out as a new parent. Needless to say, if anything doesn't sit right with you, you need to investigate.

However, I do feel you're being overly concerned. First, I believe your doctors would have caught this. They are trained professionals and although some diseases are not diagnosed right away, this is almost always diagnosed before birth these days. Second, there are varying degrees of DS but all children with DS have very similar symptoms. Only having small ears is not one of them. The baby has to display many symptoms/signs and unless she's displaying other things, I really honestly truly feel you have nothing to worry about. Here's a link that explains what to look for:

http://www.babycentre.co.uk/baby/health/downssyndrome/

http://www.wrongdiagnosis.com/d/down_syndrome/symptoms.ht...

There's no question with most children born with DS, it's obvious. Even if they have a mild case, the symptoms are still all the same.

My sister has Down's, and I had early prenatal testing to know for sure (Amnio at 14 weeks with my first, CVS at 11 weeks with my twins). My feeling is that if your doctor had any doubts they would have done genetic testing -- it's relatively simple. However, I agree with many other moms, that you should not have to spend even a single minute worrying. If you have any doubts, call the doctor's office and ask them. I would expect if they had any concerns they would have run tests on him or her as a newborn and they could tell you conclusively. You have WAY too much to worry about as a parent of a newborn to waste any energy on this. If they can't resolve your concerns on a simple phone call, phoey on them, find someone else. And good luck with your baby -- congratulations!!

If it will give you piece of mind, ask the doc. Not a big deal!