New Neighbor's Kids

Updated on August 24, 2011
J.H. asks from Collins, OH
12 answers

We had some new neighbors move in across from us several weeks ago. They have two children, a boy and a girl, that regularly send outside to play with my kids when they're out. My kids are 13, 12, 12, and 8. The other neighborhood kids range from 12-8. Their kids are 4 and 3. They send them outside without adult supervision, expecting my kids to watch them.

We live on a busy street (the main street into our neighborhood) and neither of the kids pay attention when crossing the street. Last week, I stepped outside and there was a guy in a pickup truck parked in front of my house. He asked if the boy was my kid. I said no. And then his mother came out and yelled at the guy for harassing her son. He yelled at her because he almost hit him.

The boy also has a horrible temper. My kids told him they didn't want to play with him because he was being mean. He took his little riding truck (a motorized Tonka thing) home and pulled the wheels off and then took a hammer to the hood of it. His father came out and screamed at him.

Also, I've been outside and heard the mother screaming at them from inside the house. (They were all inside.) They live across the street and one house down (so not directly across the street). The mother screamed "Move your foot or I'll break it!" Then the boy started screaming.

I don't know what to do about any of this. I've told the kids not to play with them any more. First of all, I think they're too old to be playing with a 4 and 3 year old. Secondly, these parents have anger issues and it's reflected in their children. Lastly, the parents send the kids outside even when there is no one out there to watch them (not even older kids) and that worries me. Hubby says I should call the police and CPS next time any of this happens. I worry about the kids and I don't want them hurt.

So what should I do?

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K.O.

answers from Louisville on

You are doing the right thing by staying away from the situation. I would not get involved other than calling the police when you feel something is happening to the child that is unsafe or potentially unsafe or if the child is being abused. Other than that...do not associate.

3 moms found this helpful

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S.L.

answers from New York on

This is sad. I believe the kids moved in across from you because God knew you'd keep an eye out and do what you can for them. Complaining about them being outside alone will cause them to be trapped inside with their crazy mother. even sadder. Teach them ASAP to always ask for someone to cross them when they want to cross the street. and instruct your kids to look both ways and direct the little ones across the street. Encourage a mature 12 or 13 yr old to print up a flyer advertising (help them print the flyer even if its not your kid) Mother's Helper for 2.50 $ an hour, a tween who is interested in making some money and who wants to babysit down the line could get some experience and money playing with these kids. Continue to keep an eye our and gently question any bruises.
Bless you for being concerned about these poor little kids

5 moms found this helpful

L.W.

answers from Dallas on

I agree with your hubby. That's horrible. I would definitely call. No kids at that age should be left unsupervised outside and the parent's behavior towards the kids are also a red flag. Can only imagine what goes on behind closed doors. Sad.

5 moms found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from Tulsa on

Your husband is right. And please tell your kids they are NOT responsible for the other kids.

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3.B.

answers from Cleveland on

If they're outside unattended I would definitely call the police. Someone could hit them, take them etc.
I just don't get parents. At 3 and 4 there's no way they should be outside alone. But it sounds like these kids are just a burden to them. How sad!

5 moms found this helpful
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M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I too agree with your husband. What is going to hurt them more, if mom carries through with her threat or they get hit or taken on that busy street? You are trying to stay out of it, but as a concerned parent you can't. You can always make an anonymous call to CPS or police and they will investigate.

5 moms found this helpful
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L.P.

answers from Pittsfield on

I agree with hubby =o)

4 moms found this helpful

D.K.

answers from Sioux City on

I think your husband is right. Call the police and CPS.

4 moms found this helpful
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K.U.

answers from Detroit on

I would agree with your husband - I think you need to put a phone call in to the proper authorities and let them investigate it. Document what you have witnessed and heard - you can call anonymously.

4 moms found this helpful

K.F.

answers from Washington DC on

3 and 4 outside alone? Wow, I got nervous if my son was in another room alone at that age! How can that mother possibly allow that? Some man driving a truck told her he almost hit one of her children, and she STILL allows it? Child protective services, or the police is definitely the way to go. Next time you see either one out alone call the police right away, it can be anonymous. If the police saw that, they would surely take the child into protective custody. That's child endangerment. How sad.

3 moms found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

My neighbor does the same thing - she is pregnant with number 7 and all the 8 year old twins, 7, 5, and 4 year old play outside all the time alone. Sometimes we see the 2 and 1 year old outside alone also...with the older siblings, but they are all too young. I don't let me 8, 6, or 4 year old outside alone very often. I'm starting to let them play in the backyard on their own, but it still makes me NERVOUS! So I'd either say something to the parents, or just keep an eye the best you can on them...but let your kids know they are NOT responsible for them. CPS is always an option.

3 moms found this helpful
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A.M.

answers from San Francisco on

If you worry about the kids, forbidding your kids to play with them isn't the answer.

Unfortunately, it creates more work for the good parents of the world, but you have to step up and be a guardian angel for these somewhat abused and neglected kids.

If anything the parents do seems CPS-worthy, then call them. Until then, be a second mother to them.

2 moms found this helpful
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